DEFIANCE Uncut 84

The screen fades up from black ...

Energetic music begins to fade up ...

A glitch effect, accompanied by a digital glitch sound effect ushers in the UNCUT logo with a slow dissolve.

The logo fades and on a black screen. Words in white appear one at a time.

THIS.

IS. 

UNCUT.

The scene opens up in the DEFIANCE WrestlePlex, as the camera takes a few sweeping shots over the screaming throngs of wrestling fans. Finally, it comes to rest on the Interview Stage off the side of the entryway, where we can spy junior reporter CHRIS TRUTT standing in a stylish caramel-colored leisure suit. He looks paradoxically excited to be there and at the same time unsure of himself.

Chris Trutt:
GOOD EVENING, FAT-FULL… wait, I mean FAITHFUL! And um, welcome to another action packed episode of UNCUT!

”RRRAAAAAHHHHH!!”

He looks legit surprised by getting such a positive crowd reaction. Clearly, he's not used to being the spotlight, but seems to be enjoying it for now.

Chris Trutt:
We’ve got a wonderful show for you all tonight! The FROZEN TAG TEAM Championships are on the line! The SUBURBAN HERMITAGE Championship on the line in our main event! And on top of all that, we’ve got--

He’s cut off by an unprecedented squeal of noise rock feedback, which can only mean… 

♫ “I Have A Prepared Statement” by Whores. ♫

”BOOOOOOO!!”

The reporter’s smile subsequently melts and the Faithful react with LOUD JEERS as none other than the Goat Bastard REZIN steps through the curtain. He scans the WrestlePlex for a moment before his sneering grin finds Trutt alone on the stage.

Chris Trutt:
M… M… M-M-MISTER REZIN!? Holy-mac-moly!

The Kabal’s resident “beast” walks out to the end of the stage and takes a moment to revel in the hate of the fans, before approaching the DEFIANCE media team’s newest whipping boy. Trutt suddenly looks like he’d rather be anywhere else.

Chris Trutt:
Um, w-welcome to the interview stage, Mister Rezin! Uhh, I wasn’t aware anyone from the Kabal was scheduled to appear for tonight!

Rezin lets out a creepy chuckle as he leans in to respond. Trutt has the mic held out almost at arm’s length to put as much distance as he can between himself and the moonsaulting maniac.

Rezin:
Heh heh… what are ANY of us really aware of, Trutt-Plug?? You’re always just blindly fumblin’ your way through the fog, looking for answers, but only finding DOOM! You should know by now, the Kabal doesn’t run itself by any schedule! We come and go as we please… 

Chris Trutt:
Well then, ummm, if you don’t mind my asking, w-w-what brings you out here tonight?

An eyebrow arches on Rezin’s unsightly face, as if this question wasn’t obvious enough.

Rezin:
…you wanna know ”what brings me out here?”

He grabs Trutt by the lapels of his suit and yanks him within inches of his grizzled face, spewing saliva everywhere.

Rezin:
I’M FRIGGIN’ BORED!! THAT’S WHAT BRINGS ME OUT HERE! It’s enough to drive a man INSANE, I tell ya!! 

Chris Trutt:
But, um, ummm… 

Rezin rips the mic out of his hand and proceeds to pace around the stage, free arm flailing over his head as he goes on a rant.

Rezin:
Lemme tell ya Trutt I got called out of a nice, comfy retirement and dragged back into this sport for one reason, and one reason only: BURN DEFIANCE to the ground! Leave this rotten company a smolderin’ pile of ash and ruin!

”BOOOOOOO!!”

The Goat Bastard widens his grin as he keeps getting nuclear heat from the Faithful.

Rezin:
And yet, since I got here, rather than FIRIN’ IT UP between the ropes, it feels like I’ve spent most of my time chillin’ in the back. Just WAITIN’, until I get told to run an interference, or put on some costume and take part in Stalks’ spooky performance art spectacles… 

Sneering again, he furiously shakes his head. 

Rezin:
But nothin’ gets DONE, Trutt! Nothin’ gets ACCOMPLISHED! Despite all the shenanigans and grandstandin’, nobuddy here even feels THREATENED by the Kabal!

He walks up to the reporter, who is still frozen in fear, and grabs him again by the lapel as he waves his arm across the jeering audience.

Rezin:
Errybuddy just keeps goin’ along with their pointless little lives, hardly givin’ a thought to dangerous, diabolical MANIACS creepin’ around down in the bowels of the WrestlePlex, plottin’ their inevitable destruction! 

Two handfuls of the leisure suit now. Trutt can only turn his head to the side as Rezin yanks him in close again and spews all over his face.

Rezin:
But where’s the fear, Trutt?! Where’s the panic!? Where’s the fuggin’ CHAOS!?! The Kabal ain’t burnin’ down JACK unless they can get something done in the ring! And I should BE IN THAT RING, Trutt! I should straight up TORCHIN’ the competition!

Rezin lets go of Trutt and takes a moment to pace the stage, grumbling to himself and running his fingers through his greasy skullet in frustration.

Rezin:
Stalks thinks I’m “his beast”…  but when that damb, dirty grease-monkey HENRY KEYES pops up like zit on my asscrack, HE’S the one who gets to go out there and have fun kickin’ his ass, while the beast is left locked up in its cage… 

Rezin throws his balled up fist angrily into the air, as though he were raging against the heavens.

Rezin:
I’m THE ESCAPE ARTIST, dambit!! I DON’T DO CAGES! 

Chris Trutt has tried to slowly tip-toe his way off the stage, hoping to go unnoticed. He doesn’t get far as Rezin spots him and pounces upon the reporter once again, seizing him by the collar and screaming point blank in his face.

Rezin:
I want to be IN THE RING, livin’ HARD and dyin’ FREE, blowin’ MINDS and kickin’ BEHINDS! I want to introduce the Queen of the Ring LINDSAY TROY to the GUILLOTINE! I want to nail the Mute Freak DEACON up on an inverted cross! 

He suddenly stiffens up and gives Trutt his deadly Stanley Kubrick stare, now pulling the reporter in until they are literally nose to nose. His free hand points out to the crowd once again.

Rezin:
I want to show all those lowlifes in the crowd that the days of their heroes bringin’ them hope and inspiration are over and gone! I want to usher in the age of DREAD and DESPAIR! I want to turn the Faithful into the FEARFUL! 

The Kubrick face transitions to Cage face as he tilts his head back, and he now looks even more psychotic than before. Chris Trutt is now just a whimpering mess.

Rezin:
I want everybody in this damb company they call DEFIANCE to know that whenever the Kabal are in the ring, SUMBUDDY is gonna get burned!

”RE-ZIN-SUCKS!! RE-ZIN-SUCKS!! RE-ZIN-SUCKS!! RE-ZIN-SUCKS!”

As the chant builds up in volume, the Goat Bastard turns his face back to the sea of fans.

Rezin:
And I guarantee all you normies… the next poor bastard that steps into that ring with Hell’s Favorite Hoosier is gonna feel that BURN!

Rezin aggressively drives his finger down and stomps the stage below their feet at the end of every sentence for added emphasis.

Rezin:
I don’t care if it’s DEACON…!

”RRRAAAAAHHHHH!!”

Rezin:
…I don’t care if it’s LINDSAY TROY…!

”RRRAAAAAHHHHH!!”

Rezin:
…and YOU BETTER BELIEVE I don’t care if it’s that no good, steampunk-ass SUM’BISH HENRY KEYES!

”RRRAAAAAHHHHH!!”

The Faithful pop hard with every mention, and Rezin clenches his eyes shut to tune out the deafening crowd noise. Chris is making an effort to slip out of his jacket, but the Goat Bastard is wise to his scheme, and yanks him in close once again.

Rezin:
I tell ya this right now, Trutt! Whoever it is that finds their way into my sights… whoever is UNLUCKY ENOUGH to walk in my path… I’m gonna SEND! THEM! STRAIGHT! To H--

♫ “Revolve” by the Melvins ♫

The sudden music hit causes Rezin’s attitude to suddenly pull a one-eighty; he nearly falls on his ass in surprise and panic, nearly dragging Trutt to the stage with him. Meanwhile, the spotlight hits the entry-way as KERRY KUROYAMA steps out onto the ramp.

”RRRAAAAAHHHHH!!”

A massive pop from the crowd greets the Pacific Blitzkrieg, who is all business as he walks out onto the stage with a mic of his own. Rezin, still panicking in every sense, tugs Trutt around every which way to keep the reporter between Kerry and himself.

Rezin:
HEY, HEY NOW, WAIT-A-MINNIT!! You can’t be out here when I’m talking! I’m the ESCAPE ARTIST, and I’m EXPRESSING MYSELF, and I--

Kerry Kuroyama
Dude… just shut up.

The Faithful ROAR, as someone has finally put into words what everyone has been feeling. Rezin glares into the crowd, but is powerless to do anything about it. Kerry stares him down intently.

Kerry Kuroyama:
You want to burn DEFIANCE to the ground, Rezin?

Kuroyama firmly shakes his head.

Kerry Kuroyama
Not on my watch. As far as I’m concerned, you Kabal punks have been running loose through this company for long enough, and we’re all sick and tired of it. 

He favors a glance to the empty ring and daringly leans in close. Rezin is wide-eyed, looking almost as paralyzed as Trutt was moments ago, as he himself leans back, not wanting to be that close to the furious gaze of the Pacific Blitzkrieg.

Kerry Kuroyama:
So why don’t I personally show you what it means to be DEFIANT. Why don’t I put the Kabal to task, and hand you your first actual loss in this federation! 

He points to the ring.

Kerry Kuroyama
Why don’t we have ourselves a match here TONIGHT, where you can finally put up or shut up!

He turns to the audience.

Kerry Kuroyama:
How about it… you all want to see that?

”RRRAAAAAHHHHH!!”

The Faithful pop in agreement! Rezin’s head whips every which way as the crowd is suddenly calling for his head. He’s losing control of the situation, and he knows it. He promptly dismisses Kuroyama’s proposal with a sweep of his hand.

Rezin:
Hey man, I know you’re desperate for a win and it’s probably driving you up the wall, but you gotta be full-blown CRAZY if you think I’m just gonna drop everything I got on my plate right now just because you want a match! Find some other chump for that!

There’s a meek clearing of the throat from behind him as Chris Trutt chimes into the conversation.

Chris Trutt:
B-but Mister Rezin… weren’t you just telling all of us about how bored you are, and how you wanted to be in the ring more?

Unseen to the reporter, Rezin clenches his eyes shut, grits his teeth, and can be seen mouthing the words “goddambit, Trutt” in annoyance.

Rezin:
Well, I mean… YEAH, but… it doesn’t matter! I’m not even scheduled to compete tonight, so THERE! Otherwise, YEAH, I’d get in that ring and moonsault your FACE off in a heartbeat!

Chris Trutt:
B-b-but MISTER REZIN…

Rezin’s eyes pop open, and he suddenly looks like he may strangle the reporter at any moment.

Chris Trutt:
D-didn’t you say that the Kabal doesn’t run by any schedule?

Rezin slowly turns around, staring daggers at Trutt while he responds through clenched teeth.

Rezin:
Why yes… THANK YOU, Trutt, for that friendly reminder… 

The Goat Bastard, now huffing and puffing, redirects his sneer to the waiting Kuroyama.

Rezin:
Okay, so maybe I got nothin’ better to do right now, but WHAT OF IT?! I’ll wrestle in a match when EYE see fit… not because all these stupid normies wanna see it! YOU think you can hang with ME?! The ESCAPE ARTIST!? HA!! I’m outta here… 

The audience jeers with derision as Rezin begins to make his exit. Kerry shakes his head as he raises the mic again.

Kerry Kuroyama:
Tsk-tsk… walking away from a challenge? I gotta say, Rezin, that’s not very punk rock of you.

”OOOOOOHHHH…”

Oh snap! Rezin stops in his tracks and slowly turns around, his face full of rage. He approaches Kerry now on the verge of absolute fury.

Rezin:
HEY MAN!! YOU SAYIN’ I’M NOT PUNK ROCK?! THAT WHAT YOU’RE SAYIN’!? I GOT MORE PUNK ROCK IN MY LITTLE TOE THAN YOU GOT IN YOUR WHOLE BODY!!

Kerry Kuroyama:
Then prove it… tonight!

Snarling, snorting, and slobbering all over himself as he tries to contain his anger, Rezin gets within inches of Kerry. Like a mountain, Kuroyama is stoic and unflinching. He just stares fearlessly into the eyes of the Goat Bastard, waiting for the answer… 

Rezin:
Okay… FINE, kiddo! You GOT YOUR MATCH!

”RRRAAAAAHHHHH!!” 

Rezin:
You and me, one-on-one! TONIGHT! No shenanigans, no Stalks… just two pissed off mutha-fuggaz BURNIN’ IT DOWN between the ropes! And don’t think I’m gonna go easy on you just because you like the Melvins!

Rezin drops the mic storms off, exiting stage right. Attempting to, anyway.

Chris Trutt:
Um, there’s no way back that way… 

The Goat Bastard twirls around and storms off in the opposite direction, exiting stage left, where the ACTUAL exit is.

Rezin:
I KNEW THAT! GEEZ, JUST SHUT UP, TRUTT! SHUT YOUR STUPID FACE!!

He disappears through the curtain, and the WrestlePlex is suddenly feeling a lot less tense. Trutt visibly lets out a sigh of relief as he redirects his attention to the Pacific Blitzkrieg still standing nearby.

Chris Trutt:
Well then, um, I guess it’s official! The Ecstasy Autist REZIN against the Prancerific Blitzenkrieg KERRY KUROYAMA, here tonight on Uncut! Kerry, are you sure that you--

Kerry Kuroyama:
Chris, I’d love to stay and chat, but right now I got a match to get ready for, and we’ve got a show to get through, so let’s just get right to it.

His music hits on cue, and Kuroyama gives the reporter a supportive pat on the back before leaving the stage area, giving the fans a lasting fist pump to get them charged up.

Chris Trutt:
Uh, well, okay then, um, I, umm… let’s get this show underway then!

The junior interviewer hurries to the back as the stage lights come down. The shot fades over to the ring as the crew finish prepping for the first match.

DDK:
We have a very interesting match to start the UNCUT wrestling side of things. It’s going to be the DEFcepticons against the Louisiana Bulldogs. The DEFcepticons will be defending their BRAZEN Tag Team Championships, as well.

Lance:
While this DEF group is new and they certainly have a funny play-on-words to the Transformers craze, these guys can go. I’ve watched their recent BRAZEN matches and been very impressed.

DDK:
And we will be getting Septimus Tyne and Megan Kron in action tonight, using the freebird rule, as the ones who will defend the tag belts.

Lance:
The Bulldogs are already in the ring and-

Voice:
Get out.

Warner turns around to see Princess Desire standing over him.

Princess Desire:
I’ll be taking over for this one. Get out.

Desire snatches the headset off Warner, lightly pushing him off the chair. Lance puts his arms in the air and walks away. Desire takes a seat and smiles sarcastically at the play-by-play man as he stares back at her.

Princess Desire:
What? Just be thankful Tyler isn’t here to take your job away from you, too. I’m ready to rock, though, let’s do this!

The Princess throws to the camera change as the DEFcepticons theme music plays.

Tyne walks out, standing at barely 4’7”, 140 pounds. Kron is behind him, at well over 6’8”, 300 pounds. She holds the other BRAZEN tag team title. The rest of the group follows behind their leader, Tyne, as he directs them down the rampway.

DDK:
Okay, so I guess it’s you and I for this one. What are your thoughts on this team, Princess?

Princess Desire:
My thoughts are, the tiny guy is kinda adorable and the amazonian woman, I won’t dare cross her and neither should you, Keebler. Don’t get any ideas!

DDK:
I’m a play-by-play man. I’m not a wrestler. Why would I?

Princess Desire:
Tyne and Kron arrive at ringside, boy do they look ready to go! Hey, Keebs, don’t let me do your job for you too. Jeez man. Let’s go!

Keebler sighs and continues.

DDK:
Mark Shields is going to referee while Denver Brandt will start for The Bulldogs and Septimus Tyne will start for the DEFcepticons.

DING DING

DDK:
We are off! Denver tries to rush Tyne but Tyne rolls through, bounces off the ropes and explodes at Denver’s knee with a cannonball!

Princess Desire:
Ha! That hit Brandt square in the kneecap! I could hear that from here!

DDK:
Brandt falls to a knee as Tyne bounces off the ropes and throws his body like a puck into Denver’s face! I have to say, that’s a unique attack…

Princess Desire:
Unique but it worked, Keebler! Looks at the pain Denver’s in!

Princess’ words are true as Denver grabs his face and Tyne shoots off the ropes yet again. This time he connects with a missile dropkick to Denver’s head, laying him out on the mat. Tyne rushes the ropes for a fourth time in this contest and performs a running moonsault on Brandt! He hooks the leg…

ONE.

TWO.

KICKOUT.

Tyne slams the mat hard, irate it’s not a three. He drills Brandt in the head with some forearms and then bounces off the ropes again…

DDK:
Oh! This time Brandt is up and crushes Tyne with a clothesline! Denver had to get down low for that one but Septimus flew head-over-heels twice!

Denver keeps it going. He hip tosses Tyne, then hip tosses Tyne again when Sep is quick to get to his feet. Finally, it's a sitdown hip toss and then a leg drop!

Princess Desire: [sarcastic]
This man is on fire!

Brandt hurls Tyne into the corner and it flips the champion a few more times before he stumbles out. Denver rushes forth and kicks Tyne to the canvas. Brandt drags the champion to his corner and tags in Oliver. The older Brandt cracks Tyne across the chest with a hard chop and Irish whips Sep into the ropes. Tyne, however, jumps on Oliver’s shoulders and spins around, throwing Brandt to the mat in a DDT!

DDK:
Tyne leaps across the ring and takes Kron!

With a head full of steam Megan demolishes Oliver with an inside-out clothesline! Kron thumps around the ring, her hulking frame looming overtop of her opponent.

DDK:
Running powerslam!

Princess Desire:
THIS WOMAN IS ON FIRE!! Actually!

Kron pulls Oliver by his neck and then hurls him into The Bulldog’s corner, telling Denver to tag back in. Instead, however, Oliver comes racing out and eats a sidewalk slam for his troubles!

Princess Desire:
The stupid brave solider tries to get one-up on this behemoth but can’t! What a bonehead move! That’s why you’re stuck in no man’s land in BRAZEN you clown! Tag out!

Kron peels Denver off the mat and tosses him on her shoulder. She stomps around the ring and hits another powerslam. Then she quickly (for a woman of her size) moves to The Bulldog’s corner, grabs Denver by his head and tosses the other Brandt inside the ring.

CRACK.

DDK:
Tyne timed that perfectly, connecting with a missile dropkick to the face!

Princess Desire:
I love these two!

The rest of the DEFcepticons cheer on the outside as Al Sparks slams the mat, Ryan Knox screams for the ending and Starscream runs around, mistakenly hitting his head off the ring post and knocking himself out for the rest of the contest!

DDK:
Kron has Denver… AND CHOKESLAMS HIM OUT OF THE RING!

Princess Desire:
Is this the greatest team in the history of BRAZEN already!?

Kron snatches the legal man, Oliver, by his neck and hits a chokeslam in the center of the ring. With Septimus Tyne already on the top rope… she tags him.

DDK:
Tyne with a shooting star press!

ONE.

TWO.

THREE.

DING DING DING

DDK:
Impressive display by the DEFcepticons! A solid victory for- HEY!

Princess Desire:
Ohhh, looks like they aren’t done, skipper.

Tyne calls the troops in and demands they line up in front of Oliver. Doing as they’re told… with all Tyne’s might he pulls Oliver off the canvas and throws him right into Megan Kron’s boot, also called the AutoBOOT.

Tyne turns into the crowd, tilts his head back and shouts.

Septimus Tyne:
MORE THAN MEETS THE EYE!

And then the rest of the team starts hammering down Oliver with punches and kicks, showing no mercy.

Princess Desire:
Sore winners! It’s about time we had some sore winners! There is More Than Meets The Eye here, Keebs! These peeps can get it done!

DDK:
This is nonsense. And Mark Shields doesn’t care…

Princess Desire:
Of course he doesn’t. He’s off staring into the crowd looking for chicks. What an awesome guy.

Finally, Tyne orchestrates his group to lift Oliver up and walk him to the edge of the ring. Tyne starts screaming into Oliver’s ear.

Septimus Tyne:
You should have tagged out when you had the chance. You’re no hero. We’re the heroes! Toss him out, crew!

And they do, right onto Denver Brandt who was just getting back up.

The camera switches to the announce table. The Princess is all smiles.

Princess Desire:
I like these guys! This is a solid gig! I’ll see you again soon…

She drops the headset and heads off shouting for Lance Warner to come back while the camera goes to ringside and the DEFcepticons celebrate.

Don’t miss the DEFIANCE ROAD, only on DEFonDemand!

 

Few days after DEFTV 147
House show @ Wrestleplex.

Nathaniel Eye is seen backstage in front of a table getting a cup of coffee. He acknowledges a few Defiants that pass by as he gets his coffee extras set up. Out of nowhere someone grabs his shoulder and twists him around...

Nathaniel:
Sc…

Before he can get the word out a forearm strike to the carotid artery! Eye drops quickly knocking over some creamer on the table. The camera turns and we see his attacker…

Scrow: {in a sick tone}
Hi.

Scrow stares down at Eye who is unconscious. He grabs under his arms and drags him around the table and sits him against the wall. He then walks over to the table.

Scrow:
Would you like a cup of coffee Dex?

Scrow grabs two cups and sets them next to each other. Scrow continues to talk to Eye as though he can actually hear him.

He pours himself a cup of coffee, missing the cup completely. And then moves the coffee pot to the other glass. He does the same thing. He acts though as if he is actually pouring it in the cup. He sets the pot down, coffee drips off the table in a puddle on the ground.

Scrow:
You know Dex, this thing between you and me has to eventually reach its climax….One or two sugars?

Eye is unresponsive.

Scrow:
Scrow has always enjoyed his coffee black.

He picks up both cups and walks over to Eye sound asleep against the wall. He takes a seat next to him and hands him the cup. Nathaniel doesn’t take it, eventually, Scrow gets annoyed and throws the cup at Eye’s head. He takes a sip of his imaginary coffee.

Scrow:
Ah...he will say this for DEFIANCE they sure know how to get good coffee beans. Don’t you think so Dex?

Scrow waits for a response and gets none.

Scrow:
Boy, any other night you don’t shut the fuck up. Now all of a sudden you have gotten all shy.

He takes another sip of the coffee, enjoying it for a moment.

Scrow:
Well, if you have nothing to say Dex this has been a hoot and holler, but he must be going.

Scrow stands up and drinks more of the coffee. He stares down at Eye.

Scrow:
Do Scrow a favor Dex, hold onto that championship just a little longer. So he can be the one that takes it from you.

He finishes off the coffee.

Scrow:
AHHH

He smacks his lips and tosses the cup in the trashcan next to the table. He walks off whistling Blinding Lights by Weeknd.

A few Defiants notice Eye’s predicament as they pass by the coffee table and quickly come to his aid calling for help.

♫ “ATTENTION ATTENTION” by Shinedown ♫

Malak Garland storms out on stage with a mean look on his face and microphone in hand. The Faithful are slowly filtering into the arena as Malak slips into the ring.

Malak Garland:
Listen up, people! I have something to say with this in-ring promo! I am RAGING right now.

Some of the fans can’t be bothered with entertaining Malak.

Malak Garland:
Toybox and Klein are going to get what’s coming to them. I still haven’t gotten over that whole hall of mirrors ordeal. Heck, it gave me night terrors. I’ve had to wear my safe space box nonstop.

Some of the Faithful laugh.

Malak Garland:
Seriously. Not cool. Then we played a joke on Jestal and pelted him with snowballs-

♫ “Steeling a Feeling” by Insignificant Indie Band ♫

Suddenly, Malak’s mic gets cut off by a really cringe tune.

DDK:
Look at this! It’s the debut of Shawn Steele here in DEFIANCE and it appears he isn’t afraid to make an impact.

Indeed, Shawn Steele walks out on stage. He’s a small shirtless dude with wet hair, cut off jean shorts and wrestling boots. He holds a microphone of his own to his mouth.

Shawn Steele:
I hate nothing more than in-ring promos. Do you think capacity crowds just sit on hand at a moments notice for you to cut a promo? UMMMMM NOPE!

Lance:
The Faithful are barely here right now. They’re entering the arena before DEFtv even starts, Darren. It’s not like they were all just magically sitting here waiting for an in-ring promo.

Steele looks at the ring with intensity.

Shawn Steele:
I’m going to CRUSH you!

Malak doesn’t even know how to respond. Steele sprints to the ring as the referee calls for the bell.

DING DING

Malak actually shows some initiative and dropkicks Steele right in the face! Steele goes flying into the corner where the Source of Envy unloads furious right and left hands on his nemesis.

DDK:
What are we witnessing, Lance? Are we in bizarro land?

Malak is relentless as Shawn Steele covers up like a putrid little punk.

Lance:
I think... I think Shawn Steele is crying!

The referee pulls Malak away who is seething at the chops.

Malak Garland: [Shouting]
Tell that bitch not to interrupt me when I’m cutting an in-ring promo. I’m RAGING.

After checking on Steele, the referee immediately turns away and waves his arms in the air, signaling the end of the match.

DING DING DING

DDK:
It’s... it’s over!?

Darren Quimbey:
Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of this match due to referee stoppage, MALAK GARLAND!

Garland raises his own hands in the air. The handful of Faithful that witnessed the drubbing are in a bit of a shock.

Malak Garland:
That’s what you get, Shawn Steele! That’s what you get when I go full AVALANCHE MODE on you!

DDK:
I’m speechless, Lance.

Lance:
Same here, Darren.

Malak pulls out a burlap pouch from his tights. He sprinkles a white powdery substance from the sack into his hand before blowing it in Steele’s face.

DDK:
What the heck was that!?

Lance:
I don’t want to know. I assume it’s snow of some sort.

The Keyboard King gets down on Shawn Steele’s level, who sits on the canvas and quivers in fear.

Malak Garland:
AVALANCHE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Garland rolls out of the ring, deposits the pouch back in his tights as the broadcast fades to commercial.

Subscribe to DEFonDEMAND today! DEFY CABLE!

Words appear across a screen as a voice speaks them out.

--For weeks I have told Malak Garland he should watch himself. The Comments Section are not a true representation of unified tag team wrestling.

They don't wrestle. They can't wrestle.

Malak Garland is a crybaby, Teresa Ames is misguided and Cyrus Bates is wasted space.

The Lucky Sevens failed The One in their quest to beat The Comments Section and take tag team wrestling back to its roots. It wasn't Max and Mason's fault they failed but they have since shown their true colors by joining Tom Morrow. The Lucky Sevens, you are now on The One's list, too.

Jestal, Dandelion, it is up to you to take tag team wrestling back.

The One knows you can do it. He's been watching this entire time.

ToyBox to the rescue.--

Cut.

DDK:
Welcome back, ladies and gents!  Hope you all enjoyed those glorious commercials!

Lance:
Every time I see those lawyer commercials, I think I have Mesothelioma.

DDK:
For the love of everything sacred, Lance.  You do NOT have Mesothelioma!

Lance:
I dunno, man.  I’ve been getting these pains in my-

DDK:
You’re fine.  

Lance:
Well, as long as you’re sure, I guess we can move on.

DDK:
Coming up next we have one third of the Gulf Coast Connection going one on one against the man who nearly shattered another third of the group’s face.  Which, by the way, we still do not have any update on Crescent City Kid.  We will, however, provide that information as soon as we receive it.

Lance:
I’m going to be honest here.  I… have a bad feeling about this one.  Arthur Pleasant unceremoniously came into DEFIANCE somewhat under the radar, and he’s already violently putting people on the shelf.  We know next to nothing about this guy’s capabilities in the ring, so the fact that we’re all coming into this one as blind as a bat has me a little uneasy.  

DDK:
I’m with you there, one-hundred percent.

Lance:
That said?  I think it’s time for introductions!

Darren Quimbey:
The following contest is scheduled for one fall! First, making his way to the ring; from New Orleans, Louisiana and weighing in at 234lbs… he is The Pensacola Playboy… AARON KING!

♫ “Surf City” by Jan & Dean ♫

Aaron King forgoes his usual playful demeanor and introduces a much more serious one as he comes out to the ring alone.  Looking into the camera, he yells, “This is for you, CCK!”, as he heads down the ramp way. Slapping hands and bumping fists, he doesn’t think twice about giving back to the Faithful in their attempts to touch one of their beloved DEFIANTS.  This, despite his current foul mood over the actions of his upcoming opponent.

♫ “It Is Raped” by Nine Inch Nails ♫

Darren Quimbey:
And his opponent; From Under the Midnight Sun in Utqiavik, Alaska and weighing in at 207lbslbs… he is The Provocateur… ARTHUR PLEASANT!

The opening chords to “It is Raped” by Nine Inch Nails hits the WrestlePlex’s atmosphere like a serrated blade to the jugular. The looping, slowly progressing, extremely menacing patterns assert a feeling of dread as it envelops the Faithful into a collective uneasiness. Nearly thirty seconds pass by the time the pale, scarred, and tattooed Arthur Pleasant makes his appearance known to the entire world of DEFIANCE Wrestling.  Adorned in a pair of wrestling tights that are neon green with a blood splatter-esque style of an intermixed orange, he adjusts his black elbow pads that share a similar splatter theme.

That’s when they appeared.  Three masked figures; one tall, one short, and one womanly in movement and figure, crawl out from behind Guerilla on their hands and knees. Each one wears a rubber mask of a famous dead comedian; only adding another layer of discomfort to the overall macabre visual.  

DDK:
Well, this must be the Family that Arthur mentioned two weeks ago at UNCUT 83.

Lance:
Or, maybe this is the Scourge that he mentioned was coming last week on DEFtv?

DDK:
Hear me out now… I think it’s both.

Lance:
Two names..?  The Family and The Scourge?

DDK:
Yeah, I dunno.  It is what it is?  All I know is that this should be quite the interesting debut match for one Arthur Pleasant.

“Don Rickles”, the shorter one, stands up first.  The second, more effeminately figured one, stands up next and sports a spot-on “Joan Rivers”.  The tallest one, who looks impeccably like “Richard Pryor”, stands up last.  “Joan Rivers” stands in front of Arthur, who towers over her, while “Richard Pryor” and “Don Rickles” flank his left and right, respectively.  Looking out into the sea of Faithful, Arthur chuckles to himself at their conformity while he slides into the ring.  Backing up into the corner facing the hard camera, Arthur’s stringy hair falls over his eyes. He pulls himself forward from the turnbuckles, his hands holding onto the ropes with a white-knuckled grip while his shoulders and bony hands crack to his delight.

Referee Benny Doyle asks if Aaron King is ready, who nods.  When doing the same to Arthur, he receives… nothing.  Arthur smiles though, and Benny takes this as a “Yes”.

DING DING

Aaron King immediately bum rushes Arthur Pleasant, hoping to score a standing attack on the Provocateur, but… Pleasant rolls under the bottom rope! King, looking nonplussed, looks at Benny Doyle with his arms at his side.  Pleasant turns his back on them as he waves out at the Faithful to a chorus of boos!

DDK:
Oh Lord. Arthur’s one of those types of wrestlers, eh?

Lance:
You mean, frustrating?

Not wanting to waste time, King slides to the outside and grabs a handful of Arthur’s tights and hair, points him towards the ring and rolls him back inside! But as soon as King follows him, Arthur continues rolling all the way to the other side and retreats to the outside again!

DDK:
Check. On the frustrating thing, that is.

Lance:
Well, it definitely looks that way.  But King is not having it! Look how persistent he is as he chases after Arthur again!

Sliding to the outside for a second time, King delivers an axe-handle smash that sends Pleasant flying into the barricade!  Not giving Pleasant a moment to recuperate from the attack, King reaches down and grabs him by the back of his head and tights for a second time and whisks his ever-evading opponent back into the ring again.

With the Faithful solidly behind the Gulf Coast Connection member, King slides back into the ring… only for Pleasant to once again roll back outside of it!

DDK:
Okay, this is getting ridiculous. Is this guy going to wrestle or what?

Lance:
I think we low-key undersold just how frustrating this guy is. Holy Mother of God.

DDK:
King is beside himself!  Looking at Benny, he looks to see if something can be done about Pleasant’s behavior, but Benny shakes his head.

Lance:
Oh, look at that gross smile on Arthur’s face. Somebody slap him already!

With a smile across his face, Pleasant realizes this is just enough of a distraction to present an opportunity. Doing a one-eighty, he slides back into the ring, and with King’s back turned towards Benny, Pleasant shoves him just enough to knock the referee into the ropes!  With Benny’s back turned towards them both, Arthur drops to one knee and meat hooks King right between the legs!

Realizing that Benny is about to turn around, Pleasant drops to his knees, and holds his crotch in faux-agony.

DDK:
Oh this son of a b-

Lance:
I can’t believe Arthur actually got King to fall for the distraction! I firmly believe this is exactly what he wants!

Not giving any room for the official to disqualify him, Arthur squints his eyes hard as he pleads with the referee to disqualify King. Benny realizes something fishy is up, though, as he looks on at King holding his own crotch in the fetal position. 

DDK:
It’s a tale of two nut sacks! Which one would you believe if you were in Benny Doyle’s position?!

Lance:
I’d like to say I’d believe Aaron King but it’s kinda like armchair game-showing “Who Wants to be a Millionaire?” and saying, “If that were me, I’d own this show!”.  You just don’t know until you’re in the hot seat!

Pleasant stands up as a smirk slowly spreads across his face like a black, veiny plague. He looks at the fallen King and reaches down to pull him up by his hair. As soon as he does this, King is back on his own two feet… and Pleasant reaches in with his hands, raking both of King’s eyes nearly out of his head!

As King reels from the vicious, illegal attack, Pleasant looks out at the crowd and… curtsies?

DDK:
Did he really just do a curtsy?

Lance:
Yeah, and the Faithful are NOT having it!

Just as frustrated as Aaron King must be from the performance he’s getting out of his opponent, the booing from the Faithful intensifies as Pleasant creeps up behind King and nails him with a stiff, shotgun dropkick. 

DDK:
King goes flying between the ropes and lands harshly on the outside mat! That’s like, what, the first wrestling move we’ve seen out of Arthur?!

Lance:
Well, technically it was just a kick.  Not really a wrestling hold, per se. But yeah, it’s the first time we’ve seen something not illegal out of Arthur in this match, for sure!

Measuring King up, Pleasant taps his foot from a hunched down position and faces the opposite ropes with his head twisted back in an unnatural direction towards King. As soon as King gets to his feet, Pleasant rushes the ropes with great speed!

DDK:
Arthur going for a suicide dive here?

Lance:
King’s about to get nailed with a–whelp, nevermind!

Giving King just enough time to get to his feet and see him coming, Pleasant makes like he’s going to dive through the ropes, but hits the ropes with his back instead.  King shuffles out of the way to escape what he thought was going to be a hard dive so fast that his own momentum causes him to fall back on his own ass.  Pleasant, meanwhile, continues on to the other side.  On the rebound, Pleasant flips into the center of the ring and begins making “snow angels” in the middle of a DEFIANCE Wrestling ring.

DDK:
Are you freaking kidding me right now?!

Lance:
This guy obviously just wants to play games tonight.  Wow.

A rambunctious, deep laugh “unArthurs” itself as the Provocateur simply loses it like a self-sniggering maniac!  King realizes what’s happening and immediately rushes into the ring!!

Pouncing on top of Pleasant, King lets loose a half dozen closed-fists to his temple and forehead.  Much to his own chagrin, Benny Doyle admonishes King about loosing his cool and hitting Pleasant in the temple.  King ceasefires and rolls back to his feet.  The Faithful rallying behind him now, King almost dances in place, waiting for Pleasant to get to his feet.  As soon as he does, King ascends to the middle turnbuckle.

WHAM!

King flies off with a stiff missile dropkick that nearly folds Pleasant in half!

DDK:
That had to feel amazing for Aaron King.  Not even gonna lie.

Lance:
You’re not wrong there!  I can feel the happiness exuding from him after finally nailing something on Arthur!

DDK:
And by the looks of it, he’s not done!  

Lance:
Nope!  Not by a longshot!

Once Pleasant gets to his feet, King is right there for a clothesline.  Pleasant pops back up and swings wildly, but King ducks and leans in with his shoulder.  Grabbing Pleasant by the small of his back and the bend of his knee, he hoists him up and crashes him back down across the point of his own knee with a pendulum backbreaker! King tries to end it by manhandling Pleasant’s shoulder down to the mat. 

One!  Pleasant shoulders out with ease right after Benny only gets to one, and King is shaking his head with frustration.

DDK:
The frustration on Aaron King is so obvious right now. 

Lance:
Pleasant showing some grit in there by shouldering out of a rough couple of moves.  Something tells me it’s going to take a lot, and I mean a LOT, more to put him away for good!

Pleasant drools from a fit of laughter as King snarls like a pissed off, wild boar.  King mounts Pleasant again and looks up at the crowd!  Raining the punches down one at a time, the Faithful count along.

One! Two! Three! Four! Five! Six! Seven! Eight! Niiiiiine… TEN!

Benny makes it to a slow four in his own right, showing leniency to King’s aggression given how the match has unfolded. As Pleasant gets to his feet, King gives an animalistic yell as he readies for his next move.

DDK:
King looking fired up here, folks!

Lance:
On top of everything that’s happened in this match, one has to wonder if part of his frustration is stemming from Crescent City Kid being mauled by Arthur Pleasant last week on DEFYtv?

DDK:
Oh without a doubt, Lance.  Without.  A.  DOUBT.

With Pleasant back on his feet, King pulls him in by his wrist and attempts a short-arm powerslam… but Pleasant counters with an elbow to the jaw!  As King reels, Pleasant lands on his feet.  He spins him around and delivers a boot to King’s gut, doubling him over.  Pleasant rakes King’s back so viciously he leaves behind scratch marks from his jagged fingernails. That’s when Pleasant pulls King by the waistband of his tights and sets him up between his legs.  Looking out at the Faithful, Pleasant spits down at King as he lifts him up for a piledriver.  Jumping up into the air, Pleasant drives King down into the mat by the crown of his head, spiking him with a brutal, perfectly executed piledriver!

Lance:
What a nasty piledriver!  I hate to say this but he could have this thing won, here!

DDK:
My neck just panged with hurt after seeing that one.  Man.. wait, what is Arthur doing here?!  Cover the man!

Rather than going for the cover, Pleasant reaches down into his own tights and pulls out a small, clear, colorless, four-inch spray bottle.  While doing this, the taller henchman on the outside slides in a Zippo lighter.  Before Benny Doyle can even realize what’s going on, Pleasant repeatedly presses down on the top, spraying King in the face, chest, abdomen, and arms with the contents of the spray bottle!

In one swift motion, Pleasant grabs the zippo lighter and flicks his thumb, creating the steady, motionless flame.

DDK:
NO!!!!! MY GOD NO!!!!!

Lance:
WHAT THE HELL?!?!  NO!!!!! 

WHOOOOOOOOOSH!!!

DDK:
MY GOD!!! AARON KING IS ON FIRE!!!!  AARON KING IS ON FIRE!!!

Lance:
SOMEBODY GET SOME DAMN HELP HERE!!!!!! 

With instinct taking over, Benny Doyle immediately turns towards one of the many cameramen on the outside.  Two of them throw their jackets as Benny catches the first dark brown one that arrives in his direction.

Lance Warner and DDK stand up from their announce booth as they witness, in absolute horror, Aaron King’s flesh burn after being lit on fire.  He rolls and flops around on the mat as Arthur Pleasant sits Indian style right in front of him.  Placing two fists under his chin, Pleasant cackles loudly as Benny Doyle frantically beats out the flames!

Seconds feel like forever before the flames finally diminish and smoke billows out from under the jacket.  King screams bloody murder as Pleasant belly laughs at his own sickening display.

Though it needn’t happen for people already can already predict what the official call is (or should be), Benny signals for the bell.

DING DING DING

Darren Quimbey:
The winner of this match via disqualification… Aaron… King.

“Downtown” Darren Keebler and Lance Warner decide in unison to leave the commentary booth and make a beeline down to the ring to offer help for the rather dire situation. Medical personnel pour out from the back as Benny Doyle keeps the cameraman’s coat jacket on top of the smoldering Aaron King.  Arthur Pleasant remains seated a mere foot in front of King’s screaming, closing his eyes in a pure ecstasy-like manner.  The medical team yell at Arthur to leave the ring, but he DEFIANTly ignores their pleas with laughter emanating deep from within his own bowls.

Theodore Cain absolutely races down to the ringside area with major fanfare, clad in track pants and a DEFIANCE Wrestling t-shirt, with a look of utter graveness tattooed on his face. He eyes the Devil Himself right in His criminal face, while Arthur Pleasant, who understands that the third member of Gulf Coast is undoubtedly coming for him, holds his mouth as if to say, “Uh-Oh!  That’s my cue!”  

Once Cain slides under the ring, Arthur makes his immediate escape by rolling under the bottom rope and to the outside.  He twirls with his arms out like someone spun him during an intimate dance as the rest of his Henchmen form a barrier between him and anybody wishing to cause him harm. Arthur stops spinning just as he reaches the edge of the ramp-way and looks on at the chaotic ruin of his sadistic actions. 

With no entrance theme playing and no commentary from Lance and DDK, Arthur saunters his way up the ramp with the rest of his “family” in tow.  A quiet tempest rolls through the WrestlePlex as a man is tended to for actual burns—most likely third or first degree given the accelerant used—in the middle of a DEFIANCE Wrestling ring.

Seeing the interview stage to his right, he can’t help himself as he makes his way towards the raised platform. Looking out at the stunned Faithful, Arthur grabs a hold of the mic stand and rips off the microphone.  Kicking the metal stand off of the raised stage, Arthur’s breaths come in rapid succession after having just “competed” in a match.

He wipes the stringy, sweat-caked hair away from his face and just… laughs.

Arthur Pleasant:
Hahahahahaha.  What a “win” for Aaron King tonight, eh unFaithful?!  Talk about being on FIRE! He really SCORCHED expectations tonight, didn’t he?  I mean...

His eyes go wide as he feigns shock, watching King kick his leg against the mat in agony and anger.

Arthur Pleasant:
…too soon?  HeHeHeHeHe...

The crowd goes from stunned to absolute RAGE as they boo him mercilessly.  Some even tossing their quasi-empty plastic cups. Arthur picks one up and empties the remnants of what didn’t spill out already from the ice cold soda, directly over his own head.

Arthur Pleasant:
All of you… sheep… out there?  You’re PATHETIC.  Is this not what you wanted?!  Did you not all buy your tickets to this show tonight hoping to see something NEW and… DIFFERENT?!

They continue their booing as Arthur Pleasant soaks it all up as openly as a player on a sports team would soak in the home crowd’s adulation.  The more he smiles, laughs, and shows zero penance for his actions, the more pissed off they become.

Arthur Pleasant:
Lies.  LIES.  FROM LIARS.  FUCKING LIAAAAAAAARS, ALL OF YOU!!!!

A few more projectiles are thrown as we’ve reached contemptuous conditions from the Faithful as Aaron King is still down on the mat.  More personnel, this time with a stretcher in tow, funnel out from Guerilla.

Arthur Pleasant:
Oh relax, people!  HE’LL BE FINE.  A skin graph or three and maybe a dab or seven of aloe vera and he’ll be right as rain! In the meantime?  I want you all to remember this moment.  Because this is but a mere BLIP in the history that I will be making here in DEFIANCE.

He looks over at Aaron King being hoisted onto the stretcher and everyone putting on latex gloves.

Arthur Pleasant:
Yeesh.  I’d go out there and give him a hand but… [fake gags]... something about the smell of burning hair makes me wanna puke. Oh, and even though the commentators aren’t DOING THEIR JOBS RIGHT NOW, feel free to hit my music any time.  

Arthur drops the microphone and laughs his way off the interview stage as “It Is Raped” plays to the dismay of everyone. 

YOU CHOOSE AT CONOR'S SCREAMLAND! Only on DEFonDemand!

 

FILMED DURING NIGHT TWO, DEFtv 147

Ken Ellis on the stage. 

And boo birds come right on out. 

Ken Ellis:
Ladies and gentlemen… the man who is here to give you all a Better Future and a brighter tomorrow… “Brighter” Tom Morrow!

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Tom Morrow struts out from the back looking pretty confident right now. He adjusts his white horn-rimmed glasses and smiles as he motions for Ken Ellis to put on his special earpiece with a microphone connected to the house PA. He finishes propping it up in his ear, then Tom slaps his shoulder. 

Tom Morrow:
Hello, folks, like my Executive Assistant Ken Ellis told you, I am the brainchild! The mastermind of the Better Future Talent Agency! And right now, I am PROUD to bring to you not only DEFIANCE’s future… but it’s HERE AND NOW...

He points to the back. 

Tom Morrow:
The Tag Team of Tomorrow! The greediest SOBs you ever saw and two KILLING MACHINES! Netflix’s next sensations! The PCP and soon to be the Sky High Titans Killers! Max and Mason Luck… THE LUCKY SEVENS!

Max and Mason Luck both walk out from the back, wearing matching black and blue-branded tracksuits! The two twin brothers bump fists with Morrow. Max has himself a glass of whiskey and smiles as he takes a drink, then makes Ken hold the glass and threatens to break his face off-mic if he drops it. 

Tom Morrow:
Next up, the enforcer of Better Future! The man with elbows that execute! Please welcome… THEO BAYLOR!

In the same new Better Future tracksuit, Theo comes out and also bumps a fist with Tom Morrow then stands next to the giants with a smile on his face. 

Tom Morrow:
And we can’t forget… the star of the show! The man who BASHED Oscar Burns’ brains in! He is the sun of DEFIANCE because EVERYTHING revolves around him! El Sol Dorado himself… ALVARO DE VARGAS!

The boos are at their loudest when Alvaro walks out from the back, arms out, and still holding what appears to be the same dented ring bell that he used upside the head of Oscar Burns. He pats it like a trophy and then looks out to the sea of fans and all remain on the stage. 

Tom Morrow:
Now, tonight, we’re gonna remain center stage because this is EXACTLY where these beasts belong. Four of the BIGGEST… four of the BADDEST… they’ve already put my past DEFIANCE projects such as Team HOSS and The Sky High Titans to shame! And at their height, I’ll admit. They were good. They were GREAT. But they didn’t have a future… 

He points to the group behind him. 

Tom Morrow:
And these men do! We took out the Sky High Titans! We took out not one, but TWO former champions in Scott Stevens and that wishy-washy needy little prick, Oscar Burns. Sure, Minute only won because Uriel was there to hold his hand like always… but you saw how quickly, Max and Mason rectified that, didn’t you?

He snaps a finger. 

Tom Morrow:
Like that.

Max pulls out a microphone from his jacket pocket and Mason does the same. 

Max Luck:
Hey Mase! Remember when I tossed Minute’s shitty little body right into the parking lot door like a lawn dart? How cool was that?

Mason Luck:
And how we drove Uriel Cortez into a limo? He think’s he’s so cool cause he dresses like a million bucks and has like an inch … aNd a HaLf … over us? Pssh big deal. It was pretty easy for us to put him right down on the Family Keeling limo wasn’t it?

Max Luck:
For real bro. For real. 

The DEFIANCE Wrestling faithful boo them when they bump their elbows together. 

Mason Luck:
And at Defiance Road we’re not just gonna take their pride and then we’re going to take their stupid name, their merchandise, their t-shirt cannon and everything and then we’re going to light it all up in a bonfire! 

The microphone goes back to Tom as they reach maximum jeerage. 

Tom Morrow:
Guys, I couldn’t have said it better myself. They beat Elise Ares with one boot! They DROPPED Cortez through the windshield of his car! Who else does that? NOBODY. 

Mason and Max clink their champagne and whiskey glass together before they each take a drink. Morrow makes his way over to Theo Baylor. 

Tom Morrow:
And we can’t forget Theo! Remember when he strangled Brock Newbludd with my very own tie and how he took Scott Stevens to his limit? Then BASHED Scott Stevens’ brains in so hard that he was yelling out “STOOVINS” when the doc asked him what his name was. THAT is Theo. Our enforcer. Our personal knocker-the-hell-outer!

More boos as Theo adjusts his sleeves show off his arms. 

Tom Morrow:
And there he is, the REAL hot fire of DEFIANCE! Our crown jewel! The sun of DEFIANCE! The man so bad that even former world champions… top level talent… fall at his feet. 

The crowd jeers when Ellis offers up his microphone to Alvaro de Vargas. He starts to open his mouth…

And laughs.

More jeering as he holds out the ring bell.

Alvaro de Vargas:
Excuse my language… both of them… but how great did I look, pendejos? Qué tan bueno me veía taking THIS ring bell… you might say.. Get ready, prepararse… and Oscar got his bell rung!

And bad laughter erupts from the group and the crowd boos at an utterly shitty joke from El Sol Dorado. He takes the bell and holds it close to his chest. 

Alvaro de Vargas:
Oscar Burns… Mister Match of the Year, Mister Wrestler of the Year Finalist… Senor Morrow tried to give you EVERY opportunity to join us. You were losing left and right!
Parecías una pequeña perra! But you left us hanging! And the one match you win in the last couple of months was because of ME! Yo gano! No tú! And instead of showing me gratitude, you PUSH Senor Morrow to the ground! Nos escupes en la cara! But when you spit in our faces, I smashed YOUR face in… and when Scott Stevens, the OLD pendejo tried to get in our business, he got knocked on his ass, too! ¡Auge! Abajo en el suelo!

He holds the bell out and the camera closes in on the slight dent. 

Alvaro de Vargas:
I busted your head open, Oscar, because you needed to pay for your disrespect. I could have BURNED you like others who have crossed me, Oscar. Pude haber prendido fuego a tu carne… but it would have been too easy to just burn you. A diferencia de ti, Oscar… since I’ve been promoted to the main roster, I haven’t lost a single match! I single-handedly defeated the biggest man in DEFIANCE, Uriel Cortez. I beat that dumb muscle Flex Kruger a few weeks ago. And now… I’m done fighting the biggest and the dumbest. Now, I want the BEST… but since I can’t fight myself, pendejo, you’ll do just fine, mister two-time FIST. 

And now he smirks. 

Alvaro de Vargas:
Abre tus oídos! Open your ears, pendejo… I’m challenging YOU to a match on DEFtv 148! If you can still pick yourself up off the floor, I’ll wait for your answer. 

Done with his tirade, Morrow smirks. 

Tom Morrow:
You heard it here first, Burnsie. You spat at us cause YOU had to have it your way. We could have RUN this place! The Kabal what? 24K who? THAT’S what we could have done. But because you won’t join Better Future, then Alvaro here will make you a part of its past. 

The four men celebrate and Morrow clicks off his headset as they depart amid a sea of jeering as we roll to the next match. 

The shot cuts to Keebler and Warner at the commentary table.

DDK:
Well ladies and gentlemen, after the events we witnessed earlier in the evening, we’re about to get to an impromptu one-on-one confrontation between the Kabal’s own unhinged powderkeg REZIN, and a man who has had a long and tumultuous history with the same organization, KERRY KUROYAMA!

Lance:
Kuroyama has been hungry for a win ever since he returned from injury at the hands of Tyler Fuse, working on behalf of the Kabal. But ending that losing streak here tonight with a win over the one man in the Kabal who remains unpinned, he could deal them a serious blow, and cast doubt on their ability to be a threat here in DEFIANCE.

♫ “I Have A Prepared Statement” by Whores. ♫

The Faithful JEER with nothing but hate and derision as the grizzled Goat Bastard REZIN bursts forth from the curtain and makes his way down the ramp, talking all kinds of unintelligible trash to the fans during his trip to the ring.

Darren Quimbey:
Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, from Indianapolis, Indiana… he weighs in at two-hundred and five pounds… representing THE KABAL, here is, the Escape Artist… RRRRRREEZZIIIIIINNN!!

Rezin scrambles up a turnbuckle and leers over the spiteful audience before performing a flip into the ring and landing on his feet. He holds his arms out to his sides with a snarky grin on his face, and revels in the purely negative crowd noise.

♫ “Revolve” by the Melvins ♫

A HUGE pop from the crowd precedes the entrance of KERRY KUROYAMA, who emerges from the curtain and barely breaks stride as he continues marching down the ramp. He pumps a fist to charge up the Faithful, but his eyes don’t leave the Escape Artist, grinning maliciously back at him from in the ring.

Darren Quimbey:
And the opponent, fighting out of Seattle, Washington… weighing in at two-hundred and twenty-nine pounds… he is the Pacific Blitzkrieg… KERRYYYYYYY KUUUROOOYAAAMAAA!!

Kuroyama ascends the steps to the apron and steps between the ropes, and Rezin promptly hops to the outside. Kerry takes a moment to scale a couple turnbuckles and pump a fist, and it’s clear by the reaction who the crowd is behind. Rezin glares at him from ringside with a sneer on his face.

DDK:
I’m beginning to think Rezin should have been more careful with what he wished for when he came out here earlier tonight! Kerry Kuroyama looks confident and laser focused!

Lance:
Indeed. The Escape Artist may have delusions of burning DEFIANCE to the ground, but the five-year DEFIANT in Kerry is looking to show him that that’s easier said than done.

Rezin gets back in the ring after the music cuts, while the official, Brian Slater, makes his final checks, and gives the signal to the timekeeper… 

DING DING

Both men begin circling each other, Kerry on the advance while Rezin backpedals. Kuroyama makes a few attempts to shoot for the legs, but Rezin’s mid-level kicks keep him at bay. A smirk forms on the Goat Bastard’s face as one shot nearly connects with the right knee.

Lance:
Kerry, playing it very cautious right now. I doubt he wants anyone taking advantage of that knee again, after such a long period of recovery.

DDK:
He at least seems to know there’s a bit of unpredictability with this opponent. Rezin has proven he can be a threat the moment you let your guard down.

Kerry tries to shoot in once more, and Rezin lands a wheel kick to the ribs to fend him off. Kuroyama looks like he's had enough as he recovers, and tells Rezin to bring it.

Kerry Kuroyama:
C’mon, punk, LET’S DO THIS!

The Faithful pop! Egged on by the crowd, Rezin warily approaches Kerry with his arms held up, ready to go into a lock-up… then at the last moment backs away and waves off Kuroyama with a dismissive “nuh-uh” swipe from his hand.

Rezin:
Heh heh, you fuggin’ idiot… 

“BOOOOO!!”

DDK:
Clearly, Rezin is trying to play mind games, throw Kerry off his--WAIT, CLOVEN HOOF OUT OF NOWHERE!!

Rezin suddenly springs across the ring, trying to catch Kerry off guard with the spinning heel kick out of nowhere, but the Pacific Blitzkrieg scopes it well as he ducks the kick, hooks the inside of the leg, and rolls him down to the ring.

DDK:
Kerry saw that coming from a mile away! Now he’s got Rezin in the roll-up!

One!

Two!

Kickout! Rezin isn’t going down that easy!

Lance:
But that would have been some sweet irony!

Rezin scrambles to his feet, but Kerry is already waiting for him. A wild side-kick is easily side-stepped and met with a forearm that leaves the Goat Bastard stunned. Kerry dips low and locks his arms around the waist…

Rezin:
AAAAAAHH!!

DDK:
NORTHERN LIGHTS SUPLEX throws Rezin across the ring!

The Faithful pop hard! Rezin rolls to his knees, holding his back, but Kerry’s shadow falls over him before long. He feebly gets a hand up…

Rezin:
Wait, bro, WAIT--AAAAAAHH!!

With the crowd going wild and the momentum rolling, Kuroyama grabs him by the arm to yank him the rest of the way to his feet, and grabs him around the neck and shoulder… 

DDK:
Nowhere for Rezin to go now… and there’s a GARGOYLE SUPLEX by Kerry! 

Lance:
He had some unbelievably MASSIVE impact on that one!

Muscle memory gets Rezin to his feet, but he is clearly out of sorts as he stumbles around on rubber legs and blindly chops into the air in front of him. With ease, Kerry twirls him around and traps the arms in double underhooks…

Rezin:
AAAAAAHH!!

DDK:
Kerry looking like a REAL BEAST right now… oh my, TIGER SUPLEX bridged right into the PIN!

One!

Two!

THR-NO!! Rezin rolls out of it! 

Lance:
And true to his name, the Escape Artist escapes the ring to get away from this onslaught.

Rezin rolls under the ropes with a THUD, before standing up and staggering around ringside as he tries to regain his bearings. Kerry is standing tall in the ring, pumping his fist to keep the crowd charged. Meanwhile, Slater begins the count…

“One… Two… Three… Four… “

Lance:
Looks like Rezin’s going to need every count before he’s ready to get back into it with Kerry.

DDK:
He definitely looks rattled after those suplexes! I can’t lie, I’m taking a bit of delight in watching him finally being taken to task, with no Stalker out here to back him up!

No longer flashing his snarky grin, a growling Rezin slowly paces back and forth on the ringside floor while he calculates his next move, muttering unintelligibly to himself. Kuroyama patiently waits in the ring, beaming with natural confidence.

DDK:
It’s somewhat relieving to see that Kerry Kuroyama is finally beginning to show that side of the Pacific Blitzkrieg we’ve come to know over the years. Maybe he’s finally found his groove again!

“Five… Six… Seven… Eight… “

Lance:
Time is almost up… Rezin’s gotta make a move here.

Rezin slips under the bottom rope at nine to break the count, and goes right back to the outside. Kerry rolls his eyes, and the fans jeer LOUD.

“BOOOOOO!!”

DDK:
Oh, give me a break…

Lance:
He’s not going to get anywhere by dragging this out, but it would definitely benefit him to cool Kerry’s jets a bit and slow the pace of this match down.

DDK:
Or, more likely, he’s just doing it to troll the crowd, and annoy the hell out of everyone!

“One… Two… Three… “

Kerry squats down and beckons the Goat Bastard back into the ring. Rezin angrily rebuffs him, and then his short attention span picks up on the ringside fans across the barrier, mocking his cowardice. 

DDK:
Uh oh… looks like the Faithful are getting to him!

He spots a fan-made sign depicting the various members of the Kabal are cartoonish pieces of excrement. The line-up reads: STINKER, SCRUB, TYLER POO’S, VICTOR GASSIO… and right on the end, Rezin sees himself christened as “RAISIN”.

Rezin:
…WHAT!? That isn’t even FUNNY! It makes NO SENSE!

Rezin angrily tries to grab at the sign, but the distraction has already bought time for Kerry to slip out of the ring. Slater keeps the count going, watching the action intently.

“Four… Five… “

DDK:
I think Rezin is allowing himself to be too distracted right now! Here comes Kerry Kuroyama, charging at FULL SPEED--Rezin looking up--GOOD GAAWD WHATTA LARIAT!!

”YYYEEEAAAAAHHHH!!”

Rezin eats the lariat so hard it flips him head over heels before splattering into the ringside floor. Kerry pumps both arms and lets out a roar that pops the ringside fans out of their seats and into a frenzy! He promptly scoops Rezin off the floor and rolls him back under the ropes… 

DDK:
Kerry’s taking this back into the ring… but wait, Rezin bites back with the KICK to the face as soon as he’s back on the canvas! Where’s this going?!

Kuroyama gets knocked back into the steel barricade, but he’s only briefly stunned. He recovers in time to see Rezin diving over the ropes and soaring through the air like a crooked vulture… 

Rezin:
YAAAAAHH--BLLGHK!!

CRASH!!

DDK:
Kerry DUCKS THE FLYING CROSS BODY, and Rezin gets DUMPED into the seats!

Lance:
He definitely has a knack for ending up out there…

DDK:
Kerry Kuroyama is proving to the Goat Bastard that he isn’t any safer outside the ring, and he’s got this place going WILD right now!

A dazed Rezin rises up on the other side of the barricade with his face speckled with corn chips and nacho cheese. Kerry clears it up a bit with a bit of help from his knuckles after a series of right hands, before dragging the Goat Bastard back over the barricade by the beard.

”KER-RY!! KER-RY!! KER-RY!! KER-RY!!”

Lance:
This crowd is firmly behind the Pacific Blitzkrieg, and for good reason. Kerry Kuroyama has been hungry for a win for a long time!

DDK:
And the finish line is in sight, as he rolls Rezin under the ropes and back into the ring! Now if he can keep this up, he--wait, Rezin with the MULE KICK as he gets to his feet! He’s running on pure desperation now! And there’s a PELE KICK to the back of the head to put Kerry to the mat!

Seeing his chance to capitalize, Rezin slaps on a headlock from the side. But Kerry fights back to his feet, and rushes him into the corner. The Escape Artist sees it coming and parkours off the turnbuckles, repositioning himself mid-air…

DDK:
OH WOW, what a TORNADO DDT drilling Kerry Kuroyama to the mat! Rezin may have this whole match turned around! Here’s the hook of the leg, and the cover!

One!

Two!

NO!! Kerry got the shoulder up!

Lance:
But Rezin has finally found his opening.

Undeterred, Rezin rolls to his feet and hides in Kerry’s blindspot as the Pacific Blitzkrieg shakes out of the cobwebs and recovers. The Goat Bastard breaks into a sprint as soon as Kuroyama makes it to a knee, and Kerry only has a second to look up and see what’s coming…

DDK:
Rezin has Kerry right in his sights… here he COMES--OH GOD, RUNNING KNEE STRIKE!

Lance:
Kerry managed to get his shoulder up to protect his head and take the brunt of the damage, but that still looked like it hurt like hell!

DDK:
Kerry’s on the mat… and here’s Rezin with a STANDING MOONSAULT, right into the pin!

ONE!

TWO!

NO!! Kerry kicks out!

Lance:
But Rezin is in full on “fire-it-up” mode!

Rezin bounds to his feet as Kerry tries to stand up. Rezin jumps into the ropes as soon as he gets to his feet…

DDK:
And there’s a SPRINGBOARD MOONSAULT to follow it up! Cover made again!

ONE!

TWO!

THR--NO!! Almost, but Kerry got the shoulder up!

Rezin:
SUMMUH-VUH-BISH!!

Lance:
Kerry is winded after those moonsaults, but Rezin is only getting more unhinged!

Snarling like a rabid animal, Rezin pounces up to the top rope while Kerry is left winded on the mat…

DDK:
Rezin going to the TOP now… THREE Moonsaults?! Sure, why not!? REZINSAULT OFF THE TOP--and Kerry ROLLS OUT OF THE WAY!!

SPLAT!

Lance:
He went to the well too many times!

The Faithful EXPLODE as Rezin crashes face first into the canvas. Kerry immediately jumps on him, trapping the arm through the legs. The panicking Goat Bastard tries to fight it, but Kerry is stronger and much more determined, and easily sets him into the pump-handle… 

DDK:
Kerry sees his opening, and now he’s trying to put this one away! Lifts Rezin off the mat for the KUROYAMA DRIVER… Rezin is FIGHTING IT!

As Kuroyama lifts him over the shoulder, Rezin tries to pitch his weight to slip out over the shoulder… but learning from past mistakes, Kerry backs up to maintain control just long enough to follow through with the Emerald Flowsion…

Lance:
Is he losing him?!

DDK:
...NO!! KUROYAMA DRIVER CONNECTS!! But OH, NOOO, Rezin ROLLS THROUGH THE ROPES off the impact!

Lance:
He managed to get it off, but Rezin succeeded in putting up just enough of a struggle to keep Kerry from delivering a direct impact in the center of the ring!

Rezin is OUT, but nevertheless drops lifelessly to the ringside floor. Kuroyama is completely flabbergasted as he watches him fall out of the ring, and frantically hurries out after him. The Faithful are squealing in anxiety.

DDK:
Hurry… HURRY!!

Kerry rolls Rezin into the ring, and quickly slides back in with a lateral press…

DDK:
He makes THE COVER!

ONE!

TWO!

THRE--NO!! Damnit, Rezin slipped out the back door! Kerry can’t believe it!

Lance:
He was in such a hurry to make that cover he forgot to hook the leg, and the Escape Artist has escaped defeat thus far!

DDK:
I can’t believe it! Of all the LUCK! What does Kerry Kuroyama have to do to get a win?!

Now looking more stressed than confident, Kuroyama makes it to his feet and takes a moment to contemplate his next move, while Rezin flops around sluggishly on the mat in a failing effort to get up. Finally, he points to the corner as he looks into the crowd. The Faithful POP HARD!

”YYYEEEAAAAAHHHH!!”

DDK:
Oh boy… Kerry’s looking to go ALL OUT now!

Lance:
This is a big risk, but Kuroyama is desperate for that win!

DDK:
Kerry brings Rezin back to his feet, and now he’s taking him to the corner! He’s taking him TO THE TOP!

Kerry lifts Rezin to the top rope, and likewise climbs to the second. The crowd is buzzing aloud as Kuroyama gives Rezin a pair of forearms right to the face… but this seemingly wakes Rezin out of his stupor, and he suddenly seizes the Pacific Blitzkrieg by the head…

DDK:
Wait, Rezin with a HEADBUTT… and Kerry TUMBLES back to the mat! Rezin falling to the OUTSIDE--!!

Kerry shakes it off and scrambles to his feet. Rezin seems to reel off the headbutt by falling back over the turnbuckle… when his hands suddenly snatch the top rope, and he yanks himself back onto his perch…

DDK:
No, HE’S BACK ON TOP--and DIVES OFF WITH REZINRANA!! He’s got the LEGS HOOKED!!

ONE!!

 

TWO!!

 

THREE!! Damnit, NO!!

Kerry pops the shoulder, but he’s half a second too late. Slater makes the signal.

DING DING DING

Darren Quimbey:
Here is your winner, by pinfall… RRRRREEEZZZINNN!!

“BOOOOOOOO!!”

♫ “I Have A Prepared Statement” by Whores. ♫

Kerry, on his knees, pleads with Brian that he got out by two, but Slater apologetically tells him it was a full three counts. He raises Rezin’s arm in victory, though it’s unclear if he’s even able to notice.

DDK:
I’m absolutely at a loss for words right now, Lance! Kerry had all the confidence and energy on his side, yet somehow, Rezin eked out yet another win, and the Pacific Blitzkrieg has incurred yet another loss!

Lance:
It’s a heartbreaking thing to witness, but nevertheless, Rezin has proven himself to be a contendable force within the Kabal. He took everything Kerry could give him, but all it took was a single miscalculation, and it gave him a massive opportunity.

DDK:
There is little doubt about it now, Rezin is a force to be reckoned with. Even IF his methods are a bit on the unconventional side. This was a big win for the Kabal. But where does Kerry Kuroyama go from here?

Lance:
I don’t know, Keebs… Kerry has been getting too emotional lately, and it’s showing. He’s angry and he’s desperate, and that’s just further weighing him down.

Kerry is seething with rage in the ring, pounding his head into the top turnbuckle pad in frustration. Rezin walks back up the ramp, taunting the jeering fans with every step. Then he spots the camera following him. Still out of breath, he begins screaming at it… 

Rezin:
Now you know, DEFIANCE… NOW YOU KNOW… what THE KABAL… brings to the table! Mark my words, DEFIANCE… you will ALL! FEAR! THE KABAL!! DO YOU HEAR ME!! YOU WILL ALL--

PAMPF!

Some overzealous fan in the crowd managed to smuggle an entire whipped cream pie, and managed to throw it over the barricade at the perfect time to catch the Escape Artist right in the face.

”HAHAHAHAHA!!!”

The Faithful BURST in laughter as DEFSec apprehends the fan. Rezin snarls as he wipes the whipped cream from his eyes and glares out to us from behind a messy white mask. Undeterred, he continues the statement.

Rezin:
YOU!! WILL!! FEAR!! THE KABAALL!!

DDK:
Ugh… folks, we got the Southern Heritage Title match coming up next! Don’t go anywhere!

Relive the winners on DEFonDemand!

 

Footage rolls of Teresa Ames recording herself on her phone, in a men’s room stall at Ballyhoo Brew.

Teresa Ames: [Whispering]
Hello, hello, hello there and welcome back to my channel. Shhhhhhhhhhh. We must keep quiet.

She looks extraordinarily pretty for the occasion. Her fake eyelashes are so long, they nearly extend past her nose.

Teresa Ames: [Whispering]
I am here, in the boy’s bathroom of Ballyhoo Brew, during the DEFys, to give all you followers a very EXCLUSIVE glimpse into things.

She pulls up a black marker into view with her free hand.

Teresa Ames: [Whispering]
Let’s do this.

She begins to read as she writes on the stall wall.

Teresa Ames: [Whispering]
For a good time, call five oh four, six seven three, nine two one...

She finishes writing the phone number but can’t finish saying her sentence as she hears two men enter the washroom. She remains still and quiet. Her eyes linger through the cracks of the stall and notice Sgt. Safety and Roosevelt Owens congregating at respective urinals. She listens to the men exchanging words.

Sgt. Safety:
You would not wreck her, Rosey. I don’t think she would be into you.

The men proceed with their business, eyes to their own equipment.

Roosevelt Owens:
I’m just saying, they still owe me a favor from a while back, that’s all.

They finish up, zip up and wash their hands for 25 seconds.

Sgt. Safety:
I do admit, she is looking hot tonight. I wonder where she went though. She’s not sitting out there with Cyrus and Malak.

A seductively evil smile lingers across Teresa’s face as she continues her hideout in the stall.

Roosevelt Owens:
I don’t know, man. But like I said, I just want to get my piece and get out of there.

Sgt. Safety:
Did you see that other girl though?

Rosey smiles at Safety.

Roosevelt Owens:
You mean Sweet Sanders? Man, she might be even hotter!

Teresa’s brow furrows as she quickly Google searches Sweet Sanders on her phone.

Sgt. Safety:
Yeah, apparently she’s been on the roster forever.

The men finally exit the bathroom, relieving all tension. Teresa lets go of her anger.

Teresa Ames: [Whispering]
Whoa guys, that was close! Big man Safety and rinky dink Owens were just in here clearly talking about me and only me. Good thing neither had to use a stall. Anyways, where were we?

She takes a moment to gather herself.

Teresa Ames: [Whispering]
Right. Toybox. Klein. Enough of the games. Jestal. You know how I feel about you but I’m not sure we can ever be together with all this animosity between our groups.

She stops to think about things for a second. The Cute N Qwerty Gurl takes a moment to tap on the stall wall, just under the phone number she left.

Teresa Ames: [Whispering]
Jestal. I know why you want to be with me though. It’s because I make men. I mean, look at where Jay Harvey is now? He’s in the main event and he’s there because he just faced me. Speaking of faces...

Her eyes drift off into fantasy land.

Teresa Ames: [Whispering]
Jestal, I wonder if your white face paint will rub off on my inner thighs when I finally get my way with you.

She chuckles.

Teresa Ames: [Whispering]
I hope you use water soluble materials because I’d like to avoid chafing if possible.

The door to the bathroom swings open once more and all that can be heard is the loud buzz of men gabbing and gloating.

Teresa Ames: [Whispering]
Shoot. I think I see Pat Cassidy and he’s definitely got to use a stall! Okay, gotta go. Thanks for tuning in. Don’t forget to subscribe to my OnlyFaithful account. Stay frosty. Ames out.

The feed to her ASMR session ends.

DDK:
Welcome to our main event for DEFIANCE Wrestling’s Uncut! Tonight we have a doozy! We have The Southern Heritage champion in the house! “The Biggest Boy” Dex Joy is going to be in action defending the championship … currently represented by the “paper” championship made by Conor Fuse. 

Lance:
And his opponent is going to be one of BRAZEN’s hottest stars and a favorite from right here in New Orleans! The giant known as “The Big Bad” BRAGG! BRAGG has been mentored directly by BRAZEN’s match-maker and DEFIANCE legend Capital Punishment. Tonight BRAGG has a chance to make a significant career jump. He is seven foot two! He is almost three-hundred fifty pounds with a deadly right hand. 

DDK:
Dex has taken on all comers since winning that belt but the issue between Tyler Fuse and Ryan Batts has just boiled over so badly there will be a triple threat match! But Dex was not content sitting around and waiting until then to defend his title even though he is doing this tonight against doctor recommendation for his knee. 

Lance:
That’s the kind of champion he promised he would be. He’s defending the title without a physical title thanks to Fuse. He’s ready for this. 

Quimbey:
Your main event of the evening is set for one fall and this will be contested for the DEFIANCE Wrestling Southern Heritage championship!!!

♫ “Loner” by Black Sabbath ♫

There is little fanfare for the giant but when he comes out he gets a nice round of applause for being the home town giant. 

Quimbey:
Coming to the ring he is the challenger … standing at seven foot two! Weighing three-hundred forty-five pounds … he is known as “The Big Bad” and he is New Orleans’s own … BBBBRRRRAAAAAAGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!

BRAGG reaches the ring, steps right over the ropes, then he raises both fists in the air. 

DDK:
BRAGG has been wrestling for a few years in the area so he has a nice following. And he has been a part of some big brawls and wins on the Clash of the Brazen shows!

The lights in the arena start to flicker on and off before simulating a blackout. The lights go out. Fans reach out for their cell phones and try to light up the Wrestle Plex. The lights slowly come back in the arena, section by section until on the big screen a cell phone battery display charges … charges … charges … and soon it’s at 1000%. “BIG DEX ENERGY!!!!” is on the screen!

♫ “Go Big or Go Home” by Chuxx Morris ♫

Darren Quimbey:
From Los Angeles California … weighing in at three-hundred-fifty-five pounds … he is the defending Southern Heritage champion … he is “The Biggest Boy” and “Dexy Baby” … DEEEEEEEXXXXXXXXX JOOOOYYYYYYY!!!!

Dex is heading to the ring and looks like a hungry lion ready to eat … and he has a special paper championship title marked “IOU” in the middle  - gifted by none other than Tyler’s own brother Conor Fuse. Dex is heading to the ring with the title belt that even BRAGG is put off by but realizes the seriousness of the opportunity. Dex gets into the ring and the camera notes a taped knee but he is ready for a fight regardless. 

DDK:
Fighting a giant with a bum wheel is not the smartest move Dex has made but he’s fueled by so much energy and desire for this business it’s hard to root against him. 

Dex is ready. BRAGG is ready. The two fight!

DING DING DING!!!

Dex goes out of his way to offer the massive man in front of him his hand. BRAGG looks at his hand and the two men shake. Then things take a complete opposite turn because that is when the massive New Orleans giant throws a stiff shot to the side of Joy’s temple. Dex clearly does not expect it as BRAGG comes out swinging. 

Knees!

More stiff clubbing shots!

DDK:
Wow! BRAGG has come out of the gate! I think this crowd has him fired up. 

Lance:
I don’t doubt that! 

He already has Dex in a corner where he can’t get around BRAGG. He throws more elbows in the corner and lays right into the champion with everything he has. Before Dex can get himself out of the corner any more, The Big Bad hits more knees and elbows. When Dex cannot move, BRAGG holds out his hand and throws a chop so loud it can be heard all throughout the Wrestle-Plex!!!

DDK:
What do you know about this giant, Lance?

Lance:
He has been a stand out in Brazen on their last few specials. He has recently challenged for the Brazen title. He’s a threat to pretty much any title I think he wants. He just needs more big match experience and he can go far. 

DDK:
He’s going pretty far right now I’d say!

He tries grabbing Dex out from the corner but he is caught off guard by Dex kicking him in the leg doing whatever he can to create space between himself and the Big Bad. Dex tries a body slam but when he gets BRAGG up just a bit, BRAGG elbows his way free and then throws a kick into the leg of Dex. That stuns Dex and BRAGG finds himself a free shot using a big boot. The kick sends Dex into the ropes and sends him bouncing back into a right hand so stiff, it even drops The Biggest Boy! BRAGG holds his hand in pain hitting such a thick noggin!

DDK:
Oh non! Dex might not even make it to Defiance Road as the Southern Heritage champion!

BRAGG goes for his first cover and could be a career making one!

One …
Two …
No!!!

Lance:
He calls that punch “Sorry About Your Jaw” and I think if he hadn’t hesitated with that fist, that might have been all!

DDK:
Dex Joy has a thick skull I guess!

Dex is sitting up and doesn’t know where he is, but he sees BRAGG coming and gets caught by the throat. He is thinking a choke slam on Dex but when he tries to get the tank up, Dex grabs him by his head and then drives him down with a big DDT reversal!

DDK:
Wow! That was pretty ugly but it worked!

BRAGG is on all fours holding his skull while Dex is about ready to fight back against the giant. He gets up first and throws punches to the head of BRAGG, getting a loud “OOO!” from the crowd after each shot. He winds up for a bionic elbow and the blow rocks the Big Bad as he is on his knees. BRAGG tries to shake sense back into himself after being rocked but it’s too late because Dex comes running off the ropes with a heavy cross body!

One …
Two …
No!!!

DDK:
Here we go! Dex Joy is now back in the fight! He wanted competition and he’s getting it. 

Dex has BRAGG right where he wants him and then tries the signature shot gun drop kick but for the first time ever his opponent surprises him by swatting the kick away! The crowd cannot believe it when BRAGG grabs Dex by the back of the neck as he tries to stand and hits his other big signature move called Watch That Last Step! 

DDK:
Nice variation on a choke slam but in reverse like a face plant! BRAGG is turning Dex over!

One …
Two …
No!!!

BRAGG looks confused that he does not get the three count nor the Southern Heritage title he is looking for. He remembers what his mentor Capital Punishment might tell him and that is to stay on his opponent at all times. 

Lance:
I think now he’s thinking a power bomb. He has that powerbomb variant that he calls They All Fall Down. Can he even get Dex up for it?

As he tries it … the answer is no!!!

Dex uses some effort but the tank manages to kick him up and over using a back drop instead! As BRAGG is left wondering how he would ever get flipped like that he wonders how a big man can come at him using a shot gun drop kick. The answer is that he makes it look easy! That’s how!

DDK:
Shot gun drop kick finally lands this time! Can Dex follow that up?

BRAGG is still on the ground but Dex is not far from him. He runs forward and ignores the pain in his leg to finally power BRAGG off his feet and then he plants him mightily using the Dex Drive! The crowd stands and applauds the strength of the Southern Heritage champion!

DDK:
NO WAY!!!!! HOW DID HE DO THAT?!

Dex Joy covers BRAGG. 

One …
Two …
Three!!!

Dex is up on his feet and gets awarded the Paper “IOU” Southern Heritage championship and then raises it high so everyone can see. 

Quimbey:
Your winner and still the Southern Heritage champion … DEX JJJJJJOOOOOOOOOYYYYYY!!!!

Dex takes his title and taps BRAGG on his shoulder as he barely gets to a sitting position. Joy taps him on the shoulder and then tells him “Good try!” BRAGG nods and raises Dex’s hand before the massive Brazen monster leaves and lets Dex celebrate the big win. 

DDK:
Is Dex Joy burning the candle at both ends between this and his upcoming bout with Ryan Batts and Tyler Fuse?

Lance:
I don’t know Lance. This will be his last title defense until then but tonight I’d say that if there’s a fighting bone in his body then that’s exactly what Dex is going to do and that is fight. He’ll take on all comers or go down swinging!

Dex now celebrates on the ramp and has some choice words before the show goes off the air. 

Dex Joy:
Tyler Fuse! Ryan Batts! You two pallies just woke up a sleeping giant! When I get THE belt back it’s gonna say with me for a long LONG LONG time! Dexy Baby ain’t going nowhere!!!

THIS.

IS.

DEFIANCE.