DEFIANCE Uncut 139

DDK:
Welcome to UNCUT and we’ve got several matches here for you tonight! We’re just coming off the biggest show of the year in DEFCON! And first in action, we have Titanes Familia in tag team action!

Lance:
Titanes Familia not only managed to patch things up with Minute and turn back the threat of Team HOSS, but have made some changes! Minute will be moving forward as a singles wrestler while Uriel Cortez, Titaness and Dan Leo James work in the tag team ranks under what they are calling Familia Rules!

DDK:
Any two members can represent their team and tonight to kick off UNCUT, it is Uriel Cortez and Dan Leo James in action against two of BRAZEN’s longest-reigning former Tag Team Champions, the DEFcepticons members Al Sparks and Ryan Knox! Let’s get to the action with Darren Quimbey in the ring for intros! 

In the ring, Darren Quimbey does just that for the fans in the DEFIANCE Wrestle-plex. 

Darren Quimbey:
The opening contest here on UNCUT is a tag team match set for one fall! Introducing first… 

♫ “My Name Is Thunder” by The Bloody Beetroots feat. JET ♫

The lights flicker back on and the crowd EXPLODES as a spotlight shines in tune with the appearances of the trio. Left side of the ramp: Titaness! Right side of the ramp: Uriel Cortez, arms in the air! Center of the ramp: Dan Leo James~!He is standing backwards in the spotlight until Uriel rolls his eyes, flips him around so he’s facing the right side, then points to the ring. 

Darren Quimbey:
…Being accompanied by Titaness, at a combined weight of 604 pounds… they are the team of DAN LEO JAMES AND URIEL CORTEZ… TITANES FAMILIA!

The Faithful give them a nice ovation for the team of multiple-time Unified Tag Team Champions! Uriel, Dan and Titaness all high-five the fans heading down to ringside before they reach the ring in DEFIANCE’s old stomping grounds. Once they get there, Uriel reaches up to pull himself up onto the apron, then steps over the ropes. Behind him, Dan looks out to The Faithful and points, blows kisses, and pumps his fists before he climbs inside. The Young Titan has words with Uriel before their music cuts for the arrival of their opponents. 

♫ “New Divide” by Linkin Park ♫

The fans familiar with the BRAZEN cult favorites come on out from the back! The tall Al Sparks and the tank-like Ryan Knox. 

Darren Quimbey:
And their opponents, at a combined weight of 550 pounds… the team of AL SPARKS AND RYAN KNOX… THE DEFCEPTICONS!

The tall, blonde Al Sparks and Ryan Knox get some cheers from the loyal BRAZEN Faithful in attendance as they approach the ring. 

Lance:
The rest of the DEFcepticons are supposedly off on an away mission, but let’s talk about Al Sparks and Ryan Knox! Ryan is actually the brother of referee Rex Knox but built like a TANK! Almost six-feet tall and two-eighty! And Al Sparks, six-foot nine and two-seventy! These are big men among DEFIANCE’s developmental brand! 

Al Sparks and Ryan Knox finally approach the ring. They both yell out “MORE THAN MEETS THE EYE!” before they climb into the ring. Uriel and Dan continue talking strategy amongst themselves as Sparks and Knox do the same. Knox decides to start first for his team while Dan Leo James does for his. Referee Hector Navarro calls for the bell. 

DING DING 

James and Knox lock up in a collar-and-elbow tie-up quickly as the match starts and they power each other around the ring. The Young Titan tries to muscle the DEFcepticons member to one corner, but he moves him to the other. They circle around the ring with Uriel Cortez and Titaness both cheering Dan on. They continue to struggle until Dan finally corners Knox in the ropes. He orders him to let go and Dan gives him a clean break, but turns to The Faithful for more cheers. 

DDK:
Dan Leo James has the height advantage over Knox, but Knox is powerful and has that lower center of gravity! 

Lance:
And Knox can move. He has a running spear called the Rhino Smash that helped the DEFcepticons retain those BRAZEN Tag Team Titles during their two-hundred plus day reign! 

Knox and DLJ lock up again with Dan getting a headlock tightly wound on the tank of the DEFcepticons. He leans back into the ropes and then shoots Dan off, who tries a shoulder block on the return. Knox gets struck, but doesn’t go down! Dan laughs, then pats his chest to give Ryan Knox a shot! He runs off the ropes and he hits him with a shoulder of his own! Dan bounces back, but doesn’t go down either!

DDK:
Stalemate right here! 

Dan points at Knox and takes another shot. Knox runs at the ropes, but Dan impresses The Faithful with a big leapfrog over the big man! Ryan comes back and Dan drops down! When Knox bounces off the ropes, Dan pops up and then hits him with a big running back elbow that pops The Faithful!

Lance:
Great athleticism there by James! 

James picks Knox up and then delivers a STIFF chop to the chest to back him up to the corner! The Faithful cheer when he gets backed up into a corner and then a bigger cheer when Uriel tags in!

DDK:
And here comes Uriel Cortez! The bigger man enters the ring! 

Dan hits a chop to the chest of Ryan Knox, then one from Uriel! He gets knocked to the canvas, then Cortez stands on the back of Knox! The Faithful cheer even more when Dan unexpectedly jumps on the back of The Titan of Industry to add in putting all the weight down on the chest of Knox! 

Lance:
Dan Leo James uh… doing some family bonding there, I guess! 

DDK:
All that weight down on Knox’s body! 

Cortez picks up Knox off the mat after Dan returns to the corner and splashes him. He tags in Dan and then Dan comes in… another splash! A quick tag to Cortez… then another corner splash! Knox falls to the mat as Dan gets another tag. He climbs into the ring then doubles over Knox with a big running shoulder thrust in the corner. With impressive strength, he hoists Knox on his back… 

Dan Leo James:
YEEET!

Then DROPS him down with a huge delayed back body drop! Right into a cover!

ONE!

TWO!

NO!

DDK:
YEET from Dan Leo James gets two! Knox kicks out, but the teamwork of Uriel Cortez and Dan Leo James is looking flawless right now. Quick tags and big moves. 

Dan goes to pick up the tank-like Knox again, but the DEFcepticon fights him off with elbows to the jaw before rolling back to the ropes. Dan charges at the big man, but Knox pulls the ropes down, sending the overzealous James over the ropes to the floor! 

Lance:
Ryan Knox has been overpowered by Titanes Familia, but the tag to Al Sparks! 

A dazed and battered Knox makes a tag to the 6’9” Al Sparks. He waits for DLJ to stand on the floor, then takes flight off the ring apron to wow The Faithful with a big diving clothesline! Sparks rolls out and then gets to his feet, once again yelling “MORE THAN MEETS THE EYE!”

DDK:
That was AMAZING! A great comeback by The DEFcepticons! Al Sparks has so much potential out of anyone in the group! 

The DEFcepticons’ most talented member grabs James and gets him back into the ring. He climbs in and as Dan tries to get up, he gets nailed with a charging big boot right to the face!

DDK:
What a shot! He calls that The Auto-boot! James gets knocked right off his feet! 

Titaness and Uriel both yell at Dan to try and get up, but he’s seeing starts. Al Sparks reaches over and makes the tag to Knox. He climbs into the ring and then they both take an arm. They hit what amounts to a HUGE double-team tiger driver-style move, dropping Dan on his back! 

DDK:
And that’s the Predacon Bomb! Cover by Knox!

ONE!

TWO!

NO!

DDK:
James kicks out, but an incredible double-team there by The DEFcepticons! 

Lance:
Super impressive! This would be a massive win for them if they can pull it off! They’ve been very successful in BRAZEN’s tag team ranks! 

James gets worked over in a grounded bearhug by Ryan Knox! The Young Titan tries to fight his way out of the hold, but Dan fights back again. He clubs him with a back elbow several more times, then charges back but Knox hits a ripcord jawbreaker called Fetch Quest! 

DDK:
Fetch Quest! He uses that jawbreaker to set up that running spear out of the corner! 

Knox has James in the corner and gets ready to fight back. He makes the jump… but James leapfrogs over the spear, and hits the ropes. Knox is back off the other side and then SLAMS into him with the Dash and Bash! 

DDK:
The Rhino Smash misses, but the Dash and Bash does not! Can Dan get to his corner before Knox can?

Both powerhouses are down and trying to get to their respective corners! Al Sparks gets a tag in… AND SO DOES URIEL! The hot tag has The Faithful cheering loudly as Sparks meets him in the ring with forearms! He pushes Cortez back to the ropes and delivers a few kicks!

Lance:
Al Sparks holding his own against one of the tallest men in DEFIANCE!

He tries a whip, but Cortez reverses and sends Sparks flying. He comes back and then gets CLOBBERED with a big Chop of Ages to the chest! Sparks gets knocked off his feet and the crowd wince in pain! Cortez then picks up Sparks and whips him to one side for the running back elbow in a corner. He whips Al to the other side and hits a big splash before bouncing off the ropes and colliding with DEFIANCE’s Biggest Dropkick! 

DDK:
Cortez taking this one home! Can he do it?

The Titan of Industry tries to attack Sparks, but Knox enters the ring to try to attack Cortez from behind. He clubs Cortez across the back, but Dan pushes him back! He points at Uriel and wants him to do something… The Titan of Industry nods, then uses a biel throw to launch Dan right at both DEFcepticons to the loud cheers of the crowd!

Lance:
WHOA! That’s new! He just biel tossed Dan at the DEFcepticons! 

After the impact, Dan wobbles to his corner to get available for the legal tag. He gets in and then they both grab the legal Al Sparks. They both wrap a hand around his throat and plant him with a huge double chokeslam! 

DDK:
That’s it! They call that move Father/Son Bonding! Cover!

ONE!

TWO!

THREE!

DING DING DING

♫ “My Name Is Thunder” by The Bloody Beetroots feat. JET ♫

Darren Quimbey:
Here are your winners… TITANES FAMILIA!

Lance:
A great start for the new version of Titanes Familia! Some unique double-teams by the twin towers here tonight, but The DEFcepticons gave them a run for their money. They’ll definitely have to be kept an eye out for. 

DDK:
Indeed they will! And a good show of sportsmanship from the family! 

Uriel and Dan offer a hand each to Al Sparks and lift him up before shaking hands with him as well as Ryan Knox before they take their leave. Titaness joins in the celebration in-ring with her husband and their protege as the show moves onward.

DDK:
Coming up next, we have more tag team action on tap! We saw Gentlemen’s Agreement get outraged at DEFCON over what they claim has been unfair treatment in DEFIANCE, being relegated to appearing during the DEFCON Watchalong instead of working with Gentlemen’s Agreement. 

Lance:
Gentlemen’s Agreement promised that they have recruited another to their cause, but we haven’t heard from them since DEFCON. We’ll get to in-ring action now with Gentlemen’s Agreement taking on the team of Nicky Synz and Sho Nakazawa. 

DDK:
Let’s take it to the ring for our next match with Darren Quimbey on the comms!

To Darren Quimbey, we a-go-go. 

Darren Quimbey:
The following contest is a tag team match! Introducing first… Weighing in at a combined weight of 415 pounds … the team of SHO NAKAZAWA AND NICKY SYNZ!

♫ “Good F***ing Music” (cover) by Synyster Sledge ♫

Nicky Synz explodes from the back, headbanging his long, blonde locks on his way down to the ring, slapping hands with the fans as he goes. As he does this, the young Japanese star Sho Nakazawa is behind him, slapping hands. Nicky then whips out his signature Flying V behind him and starts playing a few riffs for the crowd. He continues on his way down, getting some pops from the Faithful. When he gets inside, Sho starts doing some headbanging along with him before his music cuts.

♫ “Land of Hope and Glory” ♫

The theme plays and out comes both men, dressed in fancy new gear for the occasion. Lord Sewell with a red overcoat and yellow epaulets. and Oliver Tarquin Monroe with a dark gray sleeveless coat. He takes it off to reveal a sleeveless button-up shirt and tie, which he adjusts, but his arms are free to show off his chiseled guns. 

Darren Quimbey:
And their opponents, at a combined weight of 459 pounds… they are the team of Viscount Vice Admiral Ernest Sewell aka Lord Sewell…and Oliver Tarquin Monroe aka OTM… GENTLEMEN’S AGREEMENT!

Lord Sewell and Monroe both stop at the entrance ramp and then wait for the music to get cut. Both men have microphones. 

Oliver Tarquin Monroe:
Knaves! Lend us your ears! Gentlemen are now speaking! 

He gets boos as Lord Sewell takes his microphone. 

Lord Sewell:
At DEFCON, we told you that we were tired of being besmirched and disrespected. We demanded SATISFACTION! And since DEFIANCE has not granted our request for more suitable opportunities in that ring… we have decided to enlist another! Someone who will dirty his hands so that we don’t have to lower ourselves to such cruel, barbaric methods. 

He looks at Oliver Tarquin Monroe. 

OTM:
That is why tonight, you will rise from your seats and give the appropriate amount of applause for another man that was lost. A man looking for opportunities after his previous partners abandoned him for their own selfish gain. He was a man you may have known by another name… Earl Lee Roberts… 

DDK:
Wait… JJ Dixon’s old tag partner? Earl Lee Roberts from BRAZEN? We saw that partnership come to a bitter end months ago! 

Lord Sewell points at the Tron. 

Lord Sewell:
You used to know this man as some beer-swilling, knuckle-dragging uncouth savage, but with our help, he is now a noble man and more importantly… a gentleman! Please welcome the Gentlemen’s Agreement’s personal Royal Guard… EARL! ROBERTS!

♫ “Land of Hope and Glory” ♫

The music cues up a second time… and the man that used to wrestle in used dirty trunks and wrestling boots is now wearing a red button-up coat, black pants, and a white hat similar to the British Royal Guard. Nicky Synz and Sho Nakazawa can’t believe what they’re seeing and neither can The Faithful, who respond with a mix of booing and laughter. Earl Roberts looks out to the crowd and the former redneck brawler looks annoyed to be there… 

DDK:
What have they done to this man? In BRAZEN, he was a brawler, but tonight… he’s wearing this? 

Lance:
I don’t know. We’ve heard rumblings of Earl Lee Roberts not wanting to be left in the dust. Massive Cowboy was promoted ahead of Roberts and we know all about JJ Dixon’s career skyrocketing after Teri Melton! 

DDK:
But… is THIS what he’s willing to do to not be left behind? Serve these two? 

The 6’2 and 240-pound Earl Roberts walks slowly in his outfit with Lord Sewell and Oliver Tarquin Monroe right behind them. They enter the ringside area and then climb into the ring with Earl Roberts surveying the outside of the ring. He shakes his head quietly and maintains a silent stance at ringside with his arms resting behind his back. Nicky Synz and Sho Nakazawa both look confused, but try and shake it off as the match begins. 

DING DING

Lance:
Here we go. Oliver Tarquin Monroe and the masked Sho Nakazawa to start things off! 

The two men lock up and it is the taller OTM that takes over with an arm wringer. He trips him back up and then twists the arm, but Sho spins around on the mat, then flips back to his feet to reverse the positioning so now he has OTM by the arm! He chops him across the chest, then runs up the ropes before leaping off and taking him over with a flying headscissors! 

DDK:
Quick footwork by Sho Nakazawa! 

Lance:
And the tag to Nicky Synz!

Sho makes the quick tag to Nicky who then climbs to the top rope and then jumps off with a diving crossbody onto OTM! He rolls off of him and then plays some air guitar for the cheering fans. He turns his attention back on OTM and then springs off the nearest middle rope to connect with a springboard back elbow! Nicky rolls backwards, then crawls into a quick cover on Monroe. 

ONE!

Monroe kicks out quickly! 

DDK:
Quick kickout by Monroe, but nice series of moves by Nick Synz! Tag to Sho! 

Nakazawa climbs to the middle rope with Nicky holding the arm of OTM so he can leap off the middle rope and deliver a quick stomp to the arm! Monroe yelps out and shakes his arm as Nakazawa grabs the arm of Monroe and then delivers stiff kicks at the legs. He twists the arm around to go for another climb up the ropes, but Monroe pulls himself away as The Royal Guard looks on from outside. Monroe grabs and Lord Sewell hits a blind tag. 

Lance:
And there is a blind tag by Lord Sewell! Sho never saw it! 

Nakawaza bounces off the ropes and then goes for a springboard crossbody, but doesn’t realize that Lord Sewell is in the ring! Both OTM and Sewell catch him before they both pitch him up vertically and then score a double stun gun across the top rope! Li’l Nak’s neck gets bounced off the ropes and he hangs there as Lord Sewell points at his boot and demands that referee Rex Knox clean it. As he argues with the Lord, Earl Roberts shakes a hand, kisses his knuckle and then NAILS Sho with a huge right hand behind the ref’s back! 

Lance:
Nasty right hand there by Earl Roberts! Some Royal Guard this is! 

DDK:
Earl Lee Roberts has no bones about punching people in the face, but… why is he working with these two? Just to get noticed? 

The Faithful jeer Lord Sewell as he grabs the arm of Nakazawa and then cranks it against the mat! He slams the arm down on the mat repeatedly, and then drops a knee right down into the joint. He holds the knee in place and twists the fingers of Sho Nakazawa, forcing Li’l Nak to try and free himself, but Lord Sewell’s size advantage shows he isn’t going anywhere. 

DDK:
Great work here by Lord Sewell and Oliver Tarquin Monroe! Beyond this hoity-toity exterior they like to put on, they are a very solid pair of technicians between the ropes! 

Sewell pulls Sho up and then makes a tag to OTM before sending Li’l Nak for the ride. He hits a drop toe hold on Nakazawa, then kneels over for OTM to leap off his back into an aided elbow drop to the small of the back! Nakazawa is hurt as OTM rolls him over for the cover. 

ONE!

TWO!

NO!

DDK:
Nakazawa kicks out! Sho better find a way to make a tag over to Nicky Synz! 

Nicky bounces to and fro on the apron in his corner of the ring. He holds a hand out, but Sho is in no position to get to his partner. Monroe plants Sho with a stiff body slam! Once isn’t enough so he puts him on his back with a second one before grabbing the leg to apply a picture-perfect Boston Crab!

DDK:
This is as old school as they come! A Boston Crab by Oliver Tarquin Monroe! Can Sho make it to the ropes?

The Faithful are cheering on Sho while Lord Sewell shouts for the masked wrestler to tap. He’s close, but makes it to the ropes! 

Lance:
Sho Nakazawa makes it to the safety of those ropes just in time! Oliver forced to break the hold! 

OTM decides to hang on for a couple extra seconds, then pulls away. He goes to grab Nakazawa with another body slam, but Li’l Nak rolls OTM up with a school boy. OTM tries to roll out, but Sho rolls with him to deliver a kick to the face!  The Faithful cheer on the masked star as he reaches out to Nicky Synz. 

DDK:
Tag to Lord Sewell… and a tag to Nicky Synz! 

As Lord Sewell climbs into the ring, Nick Synz charges in off one side of the ropes and hits a running lariat takedown to wipe out the leader of Gentlemen’s Agreement. He then runs forward and lands a haymaker on OTM to knock him out of his corner. Back to Lord Sewell where he hits the ropes and then whips him to the corner. Nicky crosses the ring quickly, then charges in with a running back elbow to the jaw of Lord Sewell. Nicky rolls out of the corner, lands back to his feet, then hits the running corner spear!

DDK:
A little Double Platinum action by Nicky Synz! And then the running bulldog out of the corner!

Lance:
I think the Flying V combination is coming up next! 

Synz gets back up to the ring apron while OTM tries to pull him down… but Nicky kicks him in the leg. But as he does this, Roberts once again interferes by chop blocking the leg out from Nicky as he is on the apron!

DDK:
Hey! That was uncalled for! 

Knox doesn’t see the outside interference as Lord Sewell stumbles to the corner and tags in Monroe. OTM climbs inside and then he quickly rushes over to deliver a running shoulder thrust to Sho to knock him off the apron. He picks up Synz and then applies a double underhook before putting him on the shoulders of Lord Sewell to connect with the Handshake Deal!

DDK:
And there’s the Handshake Deal! That aided swinging neckbreaker has won every match they have used it in! Will this be another?

OTM hooks the leg of Nicky Synz. 

ONE!

TWO!

THREE!

DING DING DING

♫ “Land of Hope and Glory” ♫

Darren Quimbey:
Here is your winner… GENTLEMEN’S AGREEMENT!

The two old-timey gentlemen both wave an empty arm for Rex Knox to hold up to signify their win in tag team action, thanks in part to the interference of “The Royal Guard” Earl Roberts. Lord Sewell goes over and gestures for Roberts to open the ropes. He sighs and then climbs up the apron to sit on the middle rope so they can make their exit from the ring. 

Lance:
Another solid win for Gentlemen’s Agreement. With the aid of Earl Roberts, they could be a force in the tag team division. 

DDK:
That they could! This new union could be just what they need from each other. OTM and Lord Sewell want more opportunities at gold and Earl Roberts wants out of BRAZEN! Desperate men do desperate things! 

The new trio leave up the ramp. 

Caitlyn Kinsey sits in her locker room, already in her ring gear, but is intently reading “The Great Gatsby.” Her mother, Aurora Kaye, paces behind her nervously, her dyed blue bobbed haircut and hippie Phish-fan skirt both noticeably moving. 

Aurora Kaye: 
Caitlyn, how aren’t you worried about your match?

She continues reading.

Aurora Kaye:
Caitlyn?

Caitlyn finally looks up.

Caitlyn Kinsey:
Oh, uhm… yeah. That’s why I’m reading. It’s calming my nerves. If I don’t keep reading, I’m just going to freak out like I did last time. 

Aurora Kaye:
Well, thank your grandmother for this. She knows better than anyone that you’re not ready yet for a match on TV.

Caitlyn Kinsey:
I’ll thank her for it later.

There is a knock on the door. And in walks a nervous JJ Dixon. He’s changed his hair since the PPV, now with a 1990s part down the middle, his hair long behind his ears. He’s wearing a dark colored Member's Only jacket and a black t-shirt, giving off the look of a disaffected teenager, carrying a Jamsport backpack with a green alienhead patch. 

JJ Dixon:
Hi, Ms. Kaye. Hi, Aurora. Uhm… uh… I got you something before your match. 

JJ nervously reaches into the book bag and hands her a cassette tape. Caitlyn meekly waves and smiles as she gets up. 

JJ Dixon:
It’s a collection of songs I like.. that I think you might like. 

She takes the mix tape with her mouth agape. Aurora rushes over to look at the tape.

Caitlyn Kinsey:
Oh my god! Thank you so much! This…  this is  the nicest thing anyone has ever gotten me! 

Aurora Kaye:
“Something I Can Never Have” by Nine Inch Nails. “Glycerine” by Bush. “ Lovefool” by The Cardigans. “Hey Jealousy” by The Gin Blossoms. Avenege Sevenfold? “I Touch Myself” by The Divynyls…

Aurora has a creeped out face with the last suggestion as Caitlyn and JJ just silently stare into each other’s eyes with a burning passion that could heat a small city. Then we hear someone clearing their throat in the background.

It is Teri Melton, with a worried scowl on her face.

Teri Melton: 
JJ, I’ve been worried sick! You haven’t called. You haven’t checked in. I haven’t talked to you since your match with Nathan Eye! I mean, I knew you needed some time to cool off but you were supposed to be back at the house by 11 pm last night! 

JJ makes a snarling face as he breaks his gaze from Caitlyn’s.

JJ Dixon:
You don’t understand me and you never did! And you never will! 

JJ swings his Jamsport bookbag out of the way and storms out of the locker. Caitlyn gets up as Teri gives her a look that says “This is all your fault!”

Caitlyn Kinsey:
JJ! Wait!

Caitlyn runs off, leaving Aurora and Teri in the room alone together. The tension is palpable.

Aurora Kaye:
There, there, Teri. Every young person goes through a rebellious phase, particular when they have an unbearable authority figure.

Teri Melton:
Yes. But most people grow out of their rebellious phase by the time they can rent a car, Aurora. And is that shade of Green in your hair named “envy” because I was so much closer to your mother than you ever were? 

Aurora Kaye:
You don’t know the first thing about my mother and you never will. 

Teri Melton:
And you don’t know the first thing about success, Aurora!

The two women snarl at each other before Teri walks off.

DDK:
Welcome back to more UNCUT action and I’m being told that we’ve got Sgt. Safety in action against a mystery opponent!

Lance:
REALLY? That sounds… odd. 

DDK:
It’s a new day for a lot of our stars with DEFCON 2023 now in the books! It’s a new year for wrestling and a lot of stars want to put their best foot forward. Sgt. Safety wanted this match so here we go! Sgt. Safety against a mystery opponent coming at you! 

The camera goes to ringside for the next match. 

Darren Quimbey:
The following singles match is set for one fall! Introducing first… 

♫ “Safety Dance" by Men Without Hats ♫

Darren Quimbey:
From Chicago, Illinois, weighing in at 223 pounds… he is Officer of OSHA and The Safest Man in DEFIANCE… this is SGT. SAFETY!

The fans pop hard as Sgt. Safety comes out with a shiny new decibel meter that he can now afford on a main roster member’s salary. The crowd cheers get louder as he points it to different sections of the arena to see who can make the most noise! After he does, he steps into the ring and then holds it out one more time for each side of the arena before handing off the decibel meter. 

DDK:
Any speculation as to who we’re going to see, Lance? Another returning star like Gage Blackwood?! Bronson Box?!

Lance:
I don’t know, but I can’t wait! I always like a good mystery opponent. 

Sgt. Safety waits in the ring. 

Darren Quimbey:
And his opponent… 

A countdown starts to play on the DEFIAtron that gets the fans hyped. 

10… 9… 8… 7… 6… 5… 4… 3… 2… 1…

Black…

Then the screen pops up… 

Y. 

2. 

Sane. 

Lance:
…ugh. Damn it. 

♫ “Down With The Sickness” by Disturbed ♫

The groans of The Faithful can only signify the arrival of one man that nobody asked for…

The Hardcore Technical High-Flying Powerhouse called Justin Sane. With his hair dyed half orange and half yellow (and contacts matching the same colors), he marches out and pulls out a microphone. 

DDK:
I… We have to try and be impartial, Lance… but I can’t with this guy. 

Lance:
Can we get Arthur Pleasant out here instead? Please?

Justin Sane’s music stops as he walks halfway down the ramp. 

Justin Sane:
I was too busy getting more box than Amazon over the past few weeks to worry about DEFCON… but now that I’m BACK… It’s time for me to do what I do best. And that’s be Justin FUCKING Sane! I mean… folks… where’s the lie?

The Faithful give him complete apathy as he pulls himself up onto the apron and then steps over the ropes just as a fan yells out “KICK HIS ASS, SARGE!” Justin Sane turns to the fans. 

Justin Sane:
Hey, fuck you! The second that I autograph my sneaker? That sneaker instantly becomes TEN TIMES what you fucking make at your shitty little McJob in one year.. Now walk your ass on back through the Golden Arches while the grown folk handle business. 

Justin Sane turns his attention to the Sgt. Safety who is checking his decibel meter and looks pretty happy. 

Justin Sane:
You mind sharing with the rest of the class what the fuck is so funny? 

Sgt. Safety calls for a microphone and the Officer of OSHA gets one.

Sgt. Safety:
Mister Sane… you did something I’ve never seen anyone else do here before… these readings are perfect. Down to the last minute detail. Powerful! I might just be facing the safest opponent ever in DEFIANCE?

Justin Sane:
Yeah?

Sgt. Safety:
Yep! This noise level is zero. You get no reaction whatsoever! 

The Faithful laugh at Justin Sane… and he is not amused with Sgt. Safety’s statement. 

Justin Sane:
Oh… you’re a fucking comedian? We’ll see what you fucking think when I do something nobody has ever done in wrestling before and that’s put your little scrawny ass THROUGH A TABLE! RING THAT GODDAMN BELL!

Sgt. Safety gets ready as does referee Jonny Fastcountini. 

DING DING

The bell rings and right away, Justin Sane tries to charge at Sgt. Safety, but the Safest Man in DEFIANCE sidesteps the charge, sending Sane into the corner! He clutches his chest in pain when Sgt. Safety hits him with a big dropkick to the back, sending Sane spilling over the ropes and out to the floor!

DDK:
And Sgt. Safety off to a hot start tonight! Sane tried to get the drop on him early, but that never works!

Lance:
Now what is he doing? 

While Justin Sane is hurt, Sgt. Safety goes out to the apron. And the climbs to the first buckle… then the second. He carefully goes up top… but decides that isn’t safe and goes to the second… back to the first… then the apron… then he jumps off casually with a flying double ax handle that catches Justin Sane in the head! Sane doesn’t go down, but Sgt. Safety returns to the ring since we follow the rules here and he throws his arms up in the air for the crowd before adjusting his tie. 

DDK:
Sgt. Safety not wanting to make things too risky, but he still clobbers Justin Sane! 

Lance:
Sgt. Safety in control… no, wait! 

As The Sarge still plays with the crowd, Justin reaches in and grabs him by the legs before pulling him out to the floor. The big, deluded seven-footer grabs Safety and HURLS him right into the barricade outside! Safety collides back-first and falls to a knee. 

DDK:
Oh, no! Things are taking a turn for the worse for the Safest Man in DEFIANCE!

Lance:
And now what is this goof doing? 

Justin Sane reaches under the apron and starts to pull out a table. A few cheers come out for the appearance of furniture… but then he decides against it and puts the table back under the ring to jeers from The Faithful. 

DDK:
No furniture for the fans tonight, it seems! I mean, that would be a disqualification. 

The Hardcore Technical High-flying Powerhouse goes over and grabs Sgt. Safety before he gets picked up and rammed back-first into the ring post! Sgt. Safety gets ragdolled by the big man and thrown back into the ring. Sgt. Safety rolls around the main in pain as Sane climbs back inside the ring behind him. 

DDK:
Justin Sane in control! I’d like to see if he can keep it, but… well… that. 

Indeed, Justin Sane is eyeing a fan with his girlfriend in the front row. 

Justin Sane:
When she’s with you, she’s thinking about me, you little bitch! 

Sane turns around, only to get clipped in the knee with another dropkick by Sgt. Safety! The Sarge has to jump to rattle Sane with a few forearm smashes, but he largely shrugs them off to hit a knee on the Sarge before pulling him back to the corner, then throwing his arms out to the side. 

DDK:
Here comes the alleged finisher of Justin Sane, he calls this sitout crucifix powerbomb The Hellrazor! 

Lance:
He takes Safety up! 

Sane has The Sarge in position, but as he goes to hoist him up, Sgt. Safety kicks his legs until he free himself behind the larger opponent. The throwback to a bygone era of wrestling takes another kick to the knee and gets doubled over, allowing the Officer of OSHA to hit the leg drop bulldog!

DDK:
Safety First! Not just his life mantra, but one of his big moves! He’s got Sane stunned! 

Lance:
And now he’s going up top for real! Can he take this one home?

Sgt. Safety ends up on the top rope this time and goes for the only high-flying move he does. Sane is still rocked from Safety First when the Officer of OSHA leaps off the top… 

DDK:
CRASH PAD! HE HITS THE CRASH PAD!

He lands on top of Sane with a gorgeous diving crossbody, and then hooks the legs tightly! 

ONE!

TWO!

THREE!

DING DING DING

♫ “Safety Dance" by Men Without Hats ♫

Sane kicks out at the count of four because he is a dick, but Sgt. Safety hears the bell and rolls out of the ring! 

Darren Quimbey:
Here is your winner… SGT. SAFETY!

DDK:
Justin Sane bullied Sgt. Safety for the better part of this bout, but he left himself wide open by playing around too long for the Hellrazor. Safety scored with Safety First and the Crash Pad to pick up the victory! 

Justin Sane sits up and has a giant fit with Jonny Fastcountini, yelling that he got his arm up before the three. 

Justin Sane:
HEY! NO! I DON’T GET FUCKING PINNED! I’M A BADASS! MY HAIRCUT SAYS SO! IT’S FIRE, MY DUDE! FIRE!

On the ramp, Sgt. Safety holds his precious decibel meter up and then heads to the back as the show moves on.

An all inclusive resort, somewhere off the coast of Mexico.

It’s close to midnight as waves gently crash against the barren beach. It’s quiet, all things considered even if the drinks are flowing and the walkway torches are screaming. Many youthful, exuberant, drunk guests gather under the beach club tiki hut but there’s no loud music despite tons of dancing.

How can this be?

Malak Garland is juking and jiving in front of his honey bee, Siobhan. Both of them, along with most of the crowd, are wearing wireless noise canceling headphones.

Indeed, they’re enjoying one of those silent headphone parties. Obviously, Malak is ecstatic as he’s there with his girlfriend, celebrating the biggest victory of his career after tapping out Flying Frenchie at DEFCON.

Malak Garland:
CUZ I WANT IT THAT A-WAY! TELL ME WHY?

As he shouts the lyrics to the song playing in everyone’s headphones, none other than Cyrus Bates comes strolling up to the bar with drinks in hand. His half buttoned Hawaiian shirt sways in the cool night breeze. Bates posts up with a huge smile of his own. He bobs his head to the beat even though he can’t hear the music. Malak twerks for a moment before strutting over to Bates. He grabs the drink with the swirly straw and takes a sip.

Malak Garland:
AIN’T NOTHING BUT A HEARTACHE!

Garland pretends he’s the main attraction of a concert as he serenades Bates like he’s a hardcore Backstreet Boys fan. The moves Malak makes are truly cringe and it’s probably best for him that everyone around him has headphones on.

Malak Garland:
THANKS FOR GETTING US DRINKS, CYRUS! THIS PEACH MANGO FRUITATA IS DIVINE, NAY, DELECTABLE!

Cyrus Bates:
You’re welcome.

Malak leans in.

Malak Garland:
WHAT? I CAN’T HEAR YOU. I HAVE HEADPHONES ON! IT’S A SILENT PARTY! ALWAYS WANTED TO HIT ONE OF THESE UP!

Bates folds his arms defiantly.

Cyrus Bates:
I said you’re welcome!

Malak Garland:
WHAT!? I CAN’T HEAR YOU.

Cyrus Bates:
I SAID YOU’RE WELCOME!

Malak rips the headphones down from his ears.

Malak Garland:
I’m right here, you don’t have to yell, sheesh.

Garland posts up next to his longtime buddy. They supervise Siobhan tearing up the dance floor from afar. Everyone is having a grand time. Malak fiddles with the straw of his fruity drink in deep contemplation.

Malak Garland:
You know, just between you and I because you’re my most trusted friend I have, I’m thinking of asking her to marry me. I’m not getting any younger. I think she’s the one. She’s great. She gets me. She gets all my texts and sends me the spiciest memes that just hit different. Although that chick over there is scorching hot too so maybe it would be wise to keep my options open.

Bates just nods. He’s never been a man of many words, after all.

Cyrus Bates:
Do what makes you happiest, Malak. You only live once. Or multiple times if your spiritual alignment enables you to believe in that. I’ll say she is pretty great though.

Malak Garland:
Yeah, I might get her pregnant by accident and go from there. I don’t know. Haven’t decided yet. Wow okay, this sangria is making me say the darndest things, eh Batesy? Shit guy, shit. I beat the Flying Frenchie at DEFCON. I TAPPED HIM OUT! ME! I DID IT! ALL BY MYSELF! WITHOUT HELP! I am the greatest wrestler alive today.

Bates just nods his head.

Cyrus Bates:
So what are you going to do now? Chase the title? Challenge Dex Joy for number one contendership? Choices seem endless.

Garland grins in his own evil way.

Malak Garland:
Nah, I want nothing to do with that busty bozo. I am a way bigger star than him anyways! Titles? Pffffffft. Who needs titles when you are a sPeCiAl aTtRaCtIoN like me! SPECIAL ATTRACTION!

Malak keeps chipping away at his drink. Maybe he should slow down.

Malak Garland:
Hey, I was doing some thinking and I’d certainly like to see more of you now that I’m a bonafide DEFIANCE stud.

Bates touches nose.

Cyrus Bates:
I’m already one step ahead of you.

The Bellicose Brawler leans over the bar and retrieves a small cardboard box.

Malak Garland:
What’s this!? For me? It’s just a box!

Cyrus Bates:
It’s not much but since I finished my intensive therapy getting over the devastating uranage move, I wanted to give you this as a token of my appreciation for your patience.

Malak doesn’t waste a second to rip into the box. He pulls out a mossy green colored military grade walkie talkie. You know, the one with the abnormally long antenna.

Malak Garland:
What the heck is this for?

It’s clear Malak’s more than half in the bag as he tinkers around with the handheld device’s many knobs and buttons.

Cyrus Bates:
It’s your very own personal communicator. Listen, instead of me randomly showing up, now you can decide when to deploy me. Just use it to call me and I’ll be there. I promise.

Garland tears up as he places a hand on the shoulder of the bigger man.

Malak Garland:
I love you. You’re my guy. I’m going to put these headphones back on now and get back to dancing. So, if you don’t mind, do your bloody butler duties and go get my bath ready back at the room AND MAKE IT SNAPPY!

Bates takes his orders seriously as he vanishes. Malak pulls the headset over his ears as he dance-walks his way over to Siobhan in the most annoying way possible. He pumps his fists in the air. She does the twist.

Malak Garland:
SILENT PARTIES RULE! I AM THE KING OF THE JUNGLE! I BEAT FLYING FRENCHIE CLEAN WITH NO HELP WHATSOEVER! I’M THE BEST AROUND! AIN’T NOTHING GOING TO BRING ME DOWN!

Fade.

DDK:
And we have more in-ring action right here, with two people having their second matches here on UNCUT, but both with major differences in their levels of experience between “The Wise Ass” Tripp Wise and “The Prodigy” Caitlyn Kinsey!

Lance:
This is going to be a really interesting matchupl “The Wise Ass” Tripp Wise is half stand-up comic and half pro-wrestler, and equally annoying at both. He’s not exactly known for his commitment to doing anything but entertaining himself, but he does have a few years of experience under his belt and is a former BRAZEN tag team champion.

DDK:
His opponent, Caitlyn Kinsey, is making her second appearance in a ring, ever. From what I understand, Caitlyn’s nose is always in some kind of book. She’s very quiet, maybe even aloof, but she and “The Special Attraction” of Your Uncut Gems JJ Dixon have hit it off quite well, to say the least. They haven’t been apart from each other for more than five minutes these past few weeks!

Lance:
Young romance aside, on top of her reading habits, Caitllyn’s combine numbers are off-the-charts as are her credentials in junior-level wrestling and martial arts. But being on television this early in her career is a really tough ask. It’s solely due to her grandmother Tabitha, a wrestling legend in the days before television wrestling reached the level it is at today. Tabitha has a giant fortune to her name, and associates with some of the world’s most powerful people, as we all know, the wealthy and powerful tend to get their way. Tabitha’s used her influence to get Caitlyn on Uncut this quickly, despite the protests from Caitlyn’s mom, Aurora Kaye, and even Caitlyn herself.

♫ “(Girl) You’ll Be A Woman Soon” by Urge Overkill ♫

The raven-haired Caitlyn comes jogging out wearing a one-piece pink leotard with an unfolded book over the stomach part of her outfit. She has a face that says “I’m trying my best to be confident but I’m not.”

♫ “In One Ear” by Cage The Elephant ♫

Tripp comes out in a Cobra Kai-influenced bodysuit, but now with red microphones blasted all over his large frame. He also has the microphone in this hand.

Tripp Wise:
All right, everyone, let’s keep it quiet for a few minutes! The Wise Ass is here and I’ve got some new material for you! I can just see it now -- Tripp Wise, the wrestling superstar with a Netflix comedy special! Move over, Sebastian Maniscalco!

There’s just a large groan from the audience.

Tripp Wise:
Hey, did you hear the one about the Italian chef that died? He pasta away!

Groans.

Tripp Wise:
I flew here this morning, and had some airplane food! Did you ever notice how awful airplane food is? It’s like they take the worst food ever made and said “Hey, let’s serve this at 35,000 feet!” Also, why don’t they make the plane out of the black box?

Groans. 

Tripp Wise: 
Come on! You people... you’re looking at the next Paula Poundstone! Or, should I say, Paula Pound-Stone! (Tripp pounds his fist into his palm.) What’s wrong with you? 

Groans.

DING DING

Caitlyn has a hesitant look on her face as the two lockup. Tripp immediately gets a headlock and snaps Caitlyn over onto the mat.

DDK:
Good fundamental takedown from Tripp -- 

But, just like his other Uncut appearance, Tripp starts giving her a noogie.

Lance:
And that’s Tripp’s strategy. That’s just so aggravating to deal with as a competitor.

Caitlyn finds the bottom rope with her foot to break the hold. Then they lock up again.

DDK:
Tripp with another headlock takeover… and now he is playing bongos on the rookie’s head!

Caitlyn again goes to the ropes. Again they lock up. And a third takedown by Tripp.

Lance:
Tripp is now petting Caitlyn’s head like she’s a cat! This is ridiculous.

Caitlyn again quickly gets to the ropes. But this time before they lock up —

DDK:
Caitlyn with a leaping knee strike! And a second! Where did that come from?

Lance:
Caitlyn is considered to be one of the great junior martial artists to come out of the Philadelphia region — and you can see why right there!

Now Caitlyn bounces off the ropes and the 6’0” woman knocks Tripp down with a running big boot! 

One! Two! No!

Caitlyn has an incredibly angry look on her face as she rips Tripp up from the mat by his left wrist, spins it, and then flips Tripp down to the mat.

DDK:
Picture perfect judo-style takedown!

Lance:
And she’s not done!

Caitlyn grabs Tripp’s wrist, and now wraps around his body, and then —

DDK:
Koji Clutch! Koji Clutch! 

Tripp’s eyes are bulging as the submission/choke takes him for surprise. But Tripp finds the ropes himself.

Lance:
With a little more seasoning and understanding of ring positioning, Caitlyn could have gotten the tap out!

Caitlyn gets up first, but Tripp hits her with a shoulder block to the stomach. He then hoists her up.

DDK:
Tripp with a fallaway slam! 

Then as she gets up, Tripp hits a running hip attack.

Lance:
I don’t think Tripp wants to joke around anymore! 

With Caitlyn out on the matc Tripp climbs to the top and jumps off with a flipping senton.

DDK:
He calls that match, ugh, See You Next Fall!

One! Two! Three! 

Tripp gets up and dusts himself off before rolling out of the ring. 

Lance:
Tripp Wise with a nice win, but you can really start to see some improvement from Caitlyn Kinsey!

Tabitha Kinsey sits in her perfect Chanel tweed power blazer/skirt suit outfit with perfect posture in an early-20th century English club chair with a dark, polished wood, rust-colored upholstery with curved armrests. Sitting in her lap is her black cat, Livia, that she carefully strokes with her left hand, while sipping tea from a porcelain cup in the other.

The lights of a fireplace crackle behind her. On the far and side walls are photos and oil paintings of Tabitha with people of power -- candids with each Supreme Court Justice, on the golf course with both George Bush’s, on a yacht off the coast of Nantucket with the Clintons, a handwritten letter from Michelle Obama, at a banquet dinner standing flanked by Nancy Pelosi on one side and Mitch McConnell on the other, all three laughing like old friends.

There are also row upon row of rare books and first-print editions of literary classics, and an oil painting of a younger Tabitha with her late husband, international shipping magnate Pierre Rumsfeld de Chirac, and a teenage Aurora Kaye.

There’s a knock on the heavy, oak door. It creaks open and a worn, tired and somewhat limping Caitlyn Kinsey walks in. As she does, Livia The Cat hisses, and Caitlyn flinches. Tabitha then gets out of the chair and warmly puts her hand on her granddaughter’s shoulder

Tabitha Kinsey:
Oh, don’t mind her, dear. Livia is just very protective of me to people she does not think I fully trust. Yet.  (There’s a certain tone used with that word.) But.. but most importantly, are you hurt? 

Caitlyn Kinsey:
No... just a little banged up from the match.

Tabitha Kinsey:
No matter. Butler! Butler! Bring my granddaughter the heating pad now!

Tabitha snaps her fingers and a giant butler whose face we cannot see aside from white gloves scurries into frame, and places a heating pad on the chair opposite Tabitha’s. Caitlyn sits.

Caitlyn Kinsey:
Are you... are you upset about the match?

Tabitha Kinsey:
No. It’s your second match as a professional. It takes time. But, yes, there are certainly improvements to be made. In due time. No, this evening, I came to discuss with you a few things. First, as I understand that you are, like me, quite the reader...

Tabitha turns to her desk and grabs a book. It’s a rare, first-print edition of “The Great Gatsby” -- what Caitlyn was reading before her match. Caitlyn’s mouth drops in shock!

Caitlyn Kinsey:
Grandma! I... I don’t know what to say... 

Tabitha Kinsey:
Open it, dear! You’ll see a note from F. Scott Fitzgerald himself. He was good friends with my father, your great-grandfather, Elihu. They socialized quite a bit together. (Caitlyn goes to hand the book back.) No, Caitlyn. The book is yours!

Caitlyn Kinsey:
I can’t possibly take this --

Tabitha Kinsey:
The proper words to use are 'Thank You.' But you can do that later. I also wanted to ask you about this... JJ Dixon you’re dating.

Caitlyn Kinsey:
Oh... JJ is so incredibly sweet. I mean, even though we’re just really starting to get to know each other, I don’t think I’ve ever liked a boy as much as I like him. We hang out all the time. He’s really going out of his way to help with my training, even though he’s hurt. He just made me a mix tape filled with alternative rock — 

Tabitha Kinsey:
And how are things going with you and his manager, Ms. Melton? As you may know, I know Teri quite well. She was my protege for several years at the end of my career and the start of hers. She took to my ways quite well. Unlike that mother of yours.

Caitlyn fidgets, as she really does not want to get into any sort of discussion about her mother and grandmother.

Caitlyn Kinsey:
Well, yeah... that’s been a problem. Teri has just, like... I don’t know, given me a bit of a cold shoulder.

Tabitha Kinsey:
Yes. Well, she’s just very... protective... of Mr. Dixon. And your mother despises Teri, as I’m sure you can tell. There’s a bit of jealousy between the two of them. You’ll come to see that navigating these types of relationships is just as important to success in wrestling as it is training and performing in the ring. And if you need help navigating those relationships... or anything at all... I’m here for you, dear. After all, you’re my only granddaughter. And you and I have more in common than first thought.

Caitlyn warmly smiles.

Caitlyn Kinsey:
Thank you, Grandma... and, not, like, just for the book.

They hug a bit awkwardly as Caitlyn leaves, book in hand. Tabitha sits in her chair with pursed lips and her mind clearly at work.

DDK:
Up next is a rematch from our final UNCUT before DEFCon -- a time limit draw between NDR and The Company Men that ended with all four men brawling back into the locker room but left many buzzing! And the brewing rivalry between both teams apparently spilled out into the streets, with all four men brawling on Bourbon Street! To add to the tension between both men, tonight’s rematch has a very important stipulation attached, with the winning team realizing their dreams and getting a match next week on DefTV!

Lance:
The Favoured Saints, along with everyone else who has seen them in action, have really been impressed with NDR - Raiden and “The StarChild” J.P. Reeves, two second-generation wrestlers taking after their father’s combining technical ability, strikes, brawling and aerial artistry in one limitless package. And The Company Men have seemingly done a convincing job lobbying some of The Favoured Saints about their marketability going forward, on top of showing themselves as highly crafty and cutthroat competitors.

♫ Theme From Succession ♫ 

The ominous piano, drum beat and violins start as Cristiano Caballero and Brayden “Dubya” Leverington both walk out wearing matching black Pantagonia Finance Bro vests, with their initials on the top left of each one. They’re also wearing matching white/pink ring shorts. Caballero is also wearing a pair of Tommy Hilfiger sunglasses on the top of his head, rubbing his smooth face. Dubya rudely snatches a microphone from an intern followed by Caballero as they roll into the ring.

Dubya: 
Tonight, you are looking at history! Because tonight, you are looking at the duo who will take DEFIANCE from its current status to a higher status -- one in which you, the lowest common denominator, are replaced with wealthier, better people! Gone, the drones who stand behind a cash register! Instead, we welcome art collectors, corporate board members and professional golfers!  As the first and only wrestler to have received a MBA from the prestigious Wharton School of Business at the University of Pennsylvania, I have the financial prowess and marketing skills to make this happen! And my partner, the great Cristiano Caballero, is The Marketer’s Dream! 

Caballero:
I am as muy guapo as 1,000 estrellas of movies. I am  Mexico’s Most Attractive Man. I have the sex with models, most married, and never pleased until they have the sex with me. Rolex, Luis Vutton, BMW -- that is what I wear and drive. But because you are, how you say... trash... the businessesmen stay away! So, we’ll make you go away!

Dubya:
You’ll thank us for it later!

♫ New Day Rising by Husker Du♫ 

The loud, fast guitars and screamy vocals come out as “The StarChild” JP Reeves and Raiden walk out. JP is wearing a black European singlet that says NDR in a silver spraypaint font, along with amateur-style headgear. Raiden - Asian, the side of his right head shaved to the skull with flowing black hair elsewhere, is wearing long trunks in the same pattern. Both power walk to the ring, with Raiden rapidly banging his head to the fast punk anthem. JP takes the microphone as both stand at ringside. The Company Men are standing at the nearby ropes, as Raiden talks trash to both of them.

JP Reeves:
Yo, you two need to hush up for a minute. (Raiden does the “shush” gesture.) Stakes is high tonight.. The last time we did this, you two acted like you did something by taking a time limit draw. Me and my guy Raiden? We’re Born Different. We’re Built for This. We’re the Next Top Chefs (Raiden makes a cutthroat gesture) and we’re ready get some Michelin Stars. We’re not letting a pair of entitled, pampered brats like you two cut the line. So, we reached out for some veteran advice…

Lance:
JP has to be talking about his dad WildStar. Raiden is the son of Tsunami. WildStar and Tsunami won tag titles all over the globe and are in several wrestling Hall of Fames. They were best known as “Dawn of a New Day,” which is why their sons took the New Day Rising - NDR - monicker!

JP Reeves:
Somebody who doesn’t just know the game… someone who doesn’t just know the rules of the game… but someone who knows how to rig the game! And we just signed up for her MasterClass! 

The lights go pitch black in the arena and there’s a buzz. But then a spotlight comes on and, in the spotlight, is Teri Melton in her Silver Vixen getup -- silver hair, with silver specs in her getup, a silver upon silver dress and dangling silver earrings.

The crowd immediately explodes at the appearance of the Yas Queen of Uncut who has a giant, sarcastic smile as she waves at The Company Men as The StarChild and Raiden laugh at their opponents as they hop up onto the ring apron. She then turns around, bats her eyes, and says it along with her adoring public.

Teri Melton + Fans:
TERI MELTON! IS READY! FOR HER CLOSEUP!

Teri then gives an overhead nod to NDR and all three of them, in perfect sync, make The DiamondHands gesture!

Uncut Gems! Uncut Gems! Uncut Gems!

DDK:
Teri Melton has been scouting NDR for a few months now, and it is now official! She has taken NDR under her wing. It appears they are officially now members of Your Uncut Gems! And the Company Men are not happy!

Teri huddles with both members of NDR.

Teri Melton:
Remember boys, as much as you want to, don’t brawl. Just wrestle. They aren’t as good as you.

Dubya starts screaming in the face of referee Benny Doyle, threatening litigation from his father’s team of attorneys, while Cristiano stomps and repeatedly kicks the bottom rope in anger. He then drops to his knees and covers his face in his hands as Dubya goes to console him.

Dubya:
No! No! No! Not her! Not Teri Melton!

Cristiano:
¡No justo! ¡No justo! 

Lance:
Cristiano might have PTSD from Teri Melton! At Tag Party IV, Cristiano actually tagged with JJ Dixon and was bragging to everyone he could find about how Teri Melton was signing him to a contract! However, Caballero had a miserable appearance in their match, giving them a tough loss, and it resulted with JJ planting Cristiano with Sunset Boulevard after the match! Since then, Caballero and Dubya have both lost singles matches in quick time to JJ Dixon -- with Teri Melton’s unique brand of mischief playing a key role!

Brayden starts to do some deep breathing and stands in front of Cristiano, who slowly gets up and follows suit with the deep breathing exercise.

DING DING

Benny Doyle calls for the bell, which can barely be heard over the buzz of the audience. Teri is giving some last second advice to NDR as Dubya and Cristiano are in their corner.

Lance:
Teri and JJ Dixon are a combined 4-and-0 against Cristiano and Dubya! 

The camera cuts to the posh office of Tabitha Kinsey. She’s sitting back in a high-backed mahogany chair, sipping from her porcelain tea cup, intently watching the match, with her pet black cat Livia sitting on her lap.

DDK:
It’s going to be Raiden and Dubya to start!

Lance:
Dubya is a tall, lanky Texan with a good arsenal of power moves backed with technical know-how. Raiden is regarded as one of the best strikers in BRAZEN, and an aerialist of the highest order!

They lock up, and Dubya uses his size advantage to push Raiden into the ropes. But Raiden meets Dubya with a karate chop. And a second. And then a few quick palm strikes that send Dubya stumbling backwards to his corner. 

DDK: 
Now Caballero comes in, even without the tag, but he gets met with an elbow from Raiden! Dubya with an eye rake to Raiden, but here comes JP with a leaping forearm to Dubya! Raiden clotheslines Cristiano over the top rope to the floor! The StarChild does the same! And both members of NDR look at each and nod --

And both hit stereo planchas onto The Company Men, laying them out on the floor. They’re both amped, pumping their fists.

N!D!R! N!D!R! N!D!R!

Doyle sternly tells NDR to head back to their corner, and they do. The Company Men get to their feet, still on the floor. Cristiano looks up, and standing on his side of the ring, blowing him a kiss, is Teri Melton. The Marketer’s Dream yelps in fear and leaps into the cradling arms of Dubya to the laughs and delight of the crowd!

Uncut Gems! Uncut Gems! Uncut Gems!

DDK:
It is entirely clear that The Company Men were not expecting to see Teri Melton tonight!

Lance:
And it’s even more clear that Teri Melton is in their heads -- and it’s not the first time The Gangster In A Gucci Gown has done this to a man!

Cristiano grabs a chair and slams it onto the floor in anger. Dubya once again tries to help Cristiano with some deep breathing.

Dubya:
She’s just a person! She’s just a person! She’s just a mortal being like us, Cristiano! 

Cristiano is still angry, pointing at Doyle, but Dubya’s words start to comfort him.

Cristiano:
¡Si! Ella es solo una majer. Ella es solo una majer. 

Cristiano calms down, and then he gets on the ring apron and tags in. Raiden does the same to The StarChild.

Lance:
Cristiano is a hit-and-run artist. He’s a bit of a coward, but he’s also very wily and shockingly quick. And JP Reeves is, just as the headgear indicates, a burgeoning master of technical wrestling, and has a dazzling array of suplexes in his back pocket, along with -- as we saw earlier -- his love of taking to the skies!

DDK:
The duo quickly lock up, but Reeves quickly places Cristiano into a side headlock and flips him over! And now they’re both back up, and Reeves pushes Cristiano into the ropes -- beautiful overhead throw! Raiden with the quick tag and is headed to the top rope! 

Reeves hits a snap suplex, and as soon as Caballero hits the mat, Raiden comes crashing down with a beautiful frog splash! Teri looks on approvingly at ringside.

One! Two! No!

Raiden now cranks on Cristiano’s arm, hits him with a side kick, and then tosses him down with a judo throw.

DDK:
You can really sense the frustration building in Cristiano!

Raiden then lifts Cristiano up, but Caballero rakes his eyes. Then Caballero quickly slaps Raiden in the face. And, if that was not insulting enough --

DDK:
Cristiano Caballero just spat in Raiden’s face! 

Raiden can’t believe that this just occurred. He stares at Cristiano in disbelief, before he charges after him. Caballero ducks out to the floor --

Lance:
If Raiden has a glaring weakness, it’s his quick temper! 

Raiden chases after him. But Caballero runs around his corner of the ring, slides under the ropes as Dubya tags him. Raiden continues to chase Caballero, who just rolled back out to the floor --

DDK:
Cristiano with a forearm uppercut to Raiden who was trying to get through the ropes! And Dubya crashes into Raiden with an elbow smash into his ribs! 

Caballero turns to the audience and fixes his hair before popping back on the ring apron.

DDK:
Dubya now lines Raiden up as Caballero tags in.

Dubya hits a running bulldog as Crisiano slingshots himself over the top rope, but bounces off the middle rope into a beautiful moonsault! He blows a kiss to the camera before hooking the leg.

One! Two! No!

Lance:
It’s highly likely that The Company Men would have won the match right there if not for Caballero’s showboating.

DDK:
Caballero now has Raiden up, but Riaden with one of those beautiful chops to the ribs! And a second! And a third! But, no, another eye rake from Caballero!

Cristiano then feints as if he’s headed to The StarChild, goading him into the ring. Reeves can’t help himself, as he enters the ring. Dubya, with his long reach, grabs Raiden’s mullet and rips him back into the corner. Caballero then charges into Raiden with a running double knee strike right to the ribs.

DDK:
And Teri Melton is now admonishing the young JP Reeves there about not falling for that kind of trick! 

Dubya tags in as Caballero whips Raiden into the far ropes and drops down. Raiden has to hop over Caballero, but is met with a perfect Texas Lariat from Dubya that forces Raiden to do a 360.

One! Two! No!

DDK:
Leverington now brings Raiden back to his corner, and he hooks on an abdominal stretch!

Lance:
The Company Men have attacked Raiden’s midsection throughout this match, and this move is only going to further wear down that part of his body!

Doyle goes to ask Raiden if he’s giving up. That allows Dubya to reach out with his far hand to Caballero, who pulls on it for extra leverage. Reeves starts to enter the ring, but Teri gives him a look --

Teri Melton:
I’ve got this. 

Caballero turns around and stops holding Dubya’s hand when Doyle checks. Doyle goes back to check on Raiden, and Caballero goes to reach. But Teri starts pointing and Doyle turns and sees Caballero just clenching onto Dubya’s hand. Doyle sees this and kicks the hands apart.

DDK:
Raiden uses that momentum to hip toss Leverington!

Lance:
And that’s the genius of Teri Melton right there! She had The Company Men walk right into that little trap.

Teri pounds the mat, and the crowd claps along! Raiden dives and connects with the outstretched hand of his partner as the crowd explodes!

DDK:
JP ducks a clothesline from Dubya -- Snapdragon Suplex! Now Caballero comes in -- and a Snapdragon Suplex for him! Reeves pulls the straps down!!!

Caballero is getting to his feet in his corner. Reeves charges and hits him with a Stinger Splash! Dubya is in NDR’s corner. The StarChild charges and goes for another Stinger Splash --

DDK:
Dubya moves out of the way, and Reeves goes crashing hard into the corner.

Teri points at Raiden, who then tags his partner quickly and drops to the mat. Brayden doesn’t see. Instead, he looks over his shoulder and yells something to Caballero.

DDK:
Dubya with a flapjack and Caballero with the cutter --

They spike The StarChild’s head into the mat!

Lance:
They call that the 10K!

Dubya covers...

DDK:
But Benny Doyle quickly surmises that Reeves is not the legal man! Dubya and Caballero are both furious, standing and arguing with the no-nonsense referee! 

Raiden then gets on the apron and springboards off the top rope with a dropkick to both men! Caballero goes rolling out of the opposite end of the ring with the momentum. 

DDK:
Raiden now off the ropes, back handspring into a spinning kick that connects perfectly across Dubya’s jaw! 

Raiden then slignshots over the top to the ring apron. The StarChild gets up and has Dubya up in a tombstone position. Raiden springboards to the top rope with a flip and they spike the MBA!

DDK:
The Final Sunset!

Just like their last match, Cristiano runs on the floor to try and pull his partner out of the ring. However, Teri Melton is crouching down like a basketball player boxing out an opponent for a rebound and preventing Mexico’s Handsomest Man from breaking up the fall via her low center of gravity!

One! Two! Three!

DING DING DING

DDK:
And this crowd roars with approval as NDR - “The StarChild” Jason Reeves and Raiden, two second generation stars who have been best friends since birth - will make their DefTV debut!

Raiden and Reeves embrace with a big hug, knowing they just won the biggest match of their lives!

N!D!R! N!D!R! N!D!R!

Lance:
A large part of it is due to Teri Melton! And if JJ Dixon’s success under her watch is indicative of anything, NDR are going to be in the mix of very big things sooner rather than later!

Reeves and Raiden roll to the floor where Teri Melton is waiting for them. Each of them takes one of her arms and kisses her on each side of the cheek as they march up the aisle. Caballero seethes at ringside, again throwing a chair into the ring railing in anger as Dubya starts to get to his feet, holding his neck. 

Teri Melton:
This is our sandbox... and we’re not sharing any toys!

The camera again shows Tabitha Kinsey sitting in her chair, sipping her tea, now with a pursed smile on her lips as she turns off the television and gets up to leave.

THIS.

IS.

DEFIANCE.