Guerrilla Grindhouse World Tour 02

*Mascara De Muerta IV vs Diego de Leon
Diego and Mascara start their match with a handshake and nods of respect in the middle of the ring. The two luchadors started the bout with a contest of speeds that saw Mascara edging Diego with experience and an advantage. 

Mascara took control immediately and started laying into Diego with slaps and chops. Mascara threw Diego to the ropes and ran in with a knee to the stomach that stunned Diego. Mascara took advantage of his momentum and brought Diego down with a single leg takedown and when Diego sat upright, Mascara is already on his feet and kicks him square in his chest to lay him back down. Mascara follows up with a standing moonsault into a pin and the Japanese audience erupts into applause.

1…

2...

Kick out. Mascara drags Diego to his feet and starts to hit Diego with a barrage of slaps and chops to the chest. Diego counters a slap with one of his own and starts adding low kicks to the lower thigh of Mascara. Diego unleashes a combination of kicks to the thigh with a spinning backfist that draws an “Ahhhhww” reaction from the Japanese crowd while throwing off the ropes. The two meet, per say in the ring with Diego attempting a baseball slide and Mascara effortlessly front flipping over him. The Japanese audience reacts with applause as the two stare and give approving nods of respect to one another.

The action starts again with Diego running at Mascara full sprint and tackling him down to the ground. The two men attempt to grapple each other in the middle of the ring for the more advantageous position. The very instant Mascara grabs the ropes Diego backrolls away and stands up to allow the veteran a chance to stand. The two lock up and Diego brings Mascara into a Thai Clinch. Diego begins kneeing Mascara and gets a one good one to his head that drops him and draws an “Ahhhwww” response from the Japanese attending.

Diego throws Mascara into a turnbuckle, following him up with a knee to the face and a monkey flip across the ring. Diego kips up and the crowd reacts, Mascara stands up but is groggy on his feet. Diego hits Mascara with a two slaps, a backfist, a high kick to the chin and concludes it by hitting Mascara with a Roaring Elbow. Diego pins Mascara in the middle of the ring…

1…

2….

3!

Diego immediately stands up Mascara and shakes his hand, the pair raise their arms together to appreciative applause from the Japanese attending.

*Felton Bigsby vs Jupiter Jones
This next match had the packed Asukara Satte crowd stuck to their seats before the bell had even rung. That’s what happens when a seven-plus foot (over four bills, too) Jupiter Jones and a six foot-three, three hundred-plus pound“Houston Strong” Felton Bigsby occupy the same building - much less the same ring - and intend to do harm to each other.

*Jimmy Rix vs Seth Stratton
The vocals of Johnny Cash bring out Jimmy Rix in preparation for his dark match against Seth Stratton. The only problem was...

*C & C Connection vs Sam Turner, Jr/Angel City eXpress
Rich and Cochrane circle each other looking for that one misstep so they can take advantage and look for a collar and elbow tie-up. Rich overpowers him and pushes him into his corner. He tags in Don who goes to work on arm. He flips Cochrane over and drops a knee onto his forehead. He picks Cochrane up and tosses him into the corner. Rich chokes him as Don distracts the referee. Sam tries to get Rich to stop but his voice falls upon deaf ears.

[The camera shot opens backstage. Seth Stratton and Defiance’s Lance Warner stand in front of a large Defiance: Grindhouse banner. Seth appears to be mildly upset.]

Lance Warner:
Seth, earlier tonight you were scheduled to wrestle Jimmie Rix but didn’t show. Can you shed some light on the situation for us?

[Seth shakes his head, as if an explanation shouldn’t be necessary.]

Seth:
I’d like to, Lance. However, my new representation has requested that I don’t field any questions about this evening’s events for contractual reasons.

LW:
Representation?

Seth:
That’s right. I’m tired of this company. Tired of their macho headgames. Tired of them trying to hold me down, like a nerd’s head in so much brackish toilet water. I’m a star, damnit. I’m a big, bright shining star, and one man knows it. That man? Wayne Dewey.

[Wayne Dewey saunters into the camera shot, wearing an ill fitting grey suit, a Bluetooth headset and a plastic grin. He sandwiches himself between Seth and Lance Warner.]

Wayne:
I’ll take it from here, Seth. You go on. Unwind. This is Japan, there’s bound to be wrestling groupies. And if not, there will be once that million dollar face is plastered on every billboard in Tokyo.

[Seth shoots Wayne a ‘Good looking out’ smirk and walks off into the night, almost certainly foreshadowing some kind of international incident to come.]

Wayne:
You know why I had to send my client off, Lance?

LW:
Uh, no. Why is that?

Wayne:
Because he’s hurt. He’s offended. He has to go drink and screw away the pain that Defiance has laid on his shoulders by booking him… for the undercard. Let me say that again for emphasis. The undercard.

[He stares seriously at Lance Warner, then the camera. He shakes his head.]

Wayne:
Seth Stratton is one of the most popular wrestlers on this company’s payroll, and that’s how they treat him? Since his win at Grindhouse 01, I’ve been getting calls from the Japanese media non-stop.

[He motions to the Bluetooth.]

Wayne:
Morning talk shows, autograph signings. Hell, they even offered to let him be a guest judge on Iron Chef! The point I’m trying to make is, Seth Stratton didn’t show up for his undercard match tonight because Seth Stratton is on the A-List. He doesn’t wrestle for free, and these fans are lucky he’d even consider taking part in an untelevised event at all.

LW:
I don’t think statements like that will endear him to the fans here in Ja-

Wayne:
Are you not listening, Lance? That doesn’t surprise me considering who signs your paychecks. Seth Stratton has already endeared himself to the fans here. This is a very respect oriented culture, and they can see when a top flight competitor like my client is being disrespected.

LW:
Oriented culture?

[Wayne’s face turns slightly red.]

Wayne:
You know what I meant.

[Wayne composes himself by straightening his tie, but it doesn’t help much.]

Wayne:
What I’m trying to say here Lance, is that if this company wants Seth Stratton in the ring, dazzling the crowd with a showcase of wrestling skill hitherto unseen by human eyes, they’re going to have to do better.

[One more steely, disapproving look.]

Wayne:
Far, far better.

[With that, Wayne shoves the mic from his face and rushes offscreen. Warner shrugs his shoulders and the feed cuts back to ringside.]

DDK:
Well, that was unexpected.

Angus:
You mean that Wayne Dewey is back in DEFIANCE, or that he's now handling the business of Seth Stratton, or that he actually kind of seemed to make sense there and have a few valid points?

DDK:
You know, whichever one of those that matters the most.

Angus:
One question though.

DDK:
Shoot.

Angus:
What does Eugene have to say about all of this?

[Keebler nods.]

Angus:
Ha! Stumped ya!

DDK:
Welcome back to the show, folks.  Up next, we’ve got a trios team joining our already stacked division.  We’ve got the debut of the group calling themselves The Hostile Order of Strong Soliders or Team HOSS for short.  They were victorious in our pre-show but now we get to see what these powerhouses can do on the big stage.

Angus:
They’re called Team Hostile Order?  Where the hell do we find these people?

DDK:
Hey! These three have teamed together the now-defunct All-Star Championship Wrestling with much and they look to continue it here in their DEFIANCE debut!

And they’re not just facing anybody.  They’ll be taking on students from “The Conclave” ran by none other than Bronson Box himself.  If these students can defeat an established team like Team HOSS, then they’ll be on the map.  

Quimbey:
The following contest is a trios match and it is set for one fall!  Already in the ring at this time, they are the team of BUTCHER VICTORIOUS… JORGE DE LA CRUZ… AND “V DOUBLE” VALENTINO VEGA!

[The trio of young rookies each play up for the crowd. Butcher Victorious is covered from head to toe in tattoos and looks fairly shady, Valentino Vega was clad in attire reminiscent of a gang member, while Jorge De La Cruz looked the most like a chiseled wrestler of the trio, but seemed way more occupied with how his abs looked than how he would win the match.]

Quimbey:
And their opponents…

“WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, QUIMBEY!  I GOT THIS, M’KAY?”

[The crowd turns their attention to a man standing onto the top of the ramp with a microphone in hand.  The man has on a blue sport coat with a Slayer t-shirt on underneath and rocking black dress pants.  His black hair is tied up in a ponytail and he’s rocking an awfully bushy hipster beard and horn-rimmed glasses that make him look like some kind of douchebag.]

DDK:
I’m being told this is the official manager of Team HOSS, his name is Junior Keeling, another name that should be familiar to fans of ACW, nbW, and Legacy of Champions.  We saw him and his team antagonize Frank Holiday and Diego De Leon last week.

Angus:
Pfft. This is DEFIANCE, Keebler. Stop hocking other promotions’ wares!

Keeling:
Greetings, Japan!  Greetings!  Konichiwa and shit!  My name is Junior Keeling… yes, THAT Junior Keeling and allow me to tell you a little about myself.  I come from a long line of successful talent scouts and agents!  I love my bitches and my bitches love me! I am thirty-three years young.  My turn-ons include slow walks on the beach, stackin’ that paper, and my favorite music of all time is anything played by the freecreditscore.com band!

[He pauses to laugh at his own dumb joke while the restless crowd sat on their hands and watched the foreigner.  A few fans turned their backs.  Mainly because he’s yelling like an obnoxious jackass and they didn’t know what he was saying.  The three Conclave students stand in the ring impatiently.]

Keeling:
And I’m proud to be here in DEFIANCE representing what will be the BIGGEST and the BADDEST in the Trios division!  These three men that are coming to this ring are the finest in unrepentant killer technology!  I have in the cadre of monsters a young prodigy with all the potential in the world… a bright star that can carry the trios division on his shoulders alone… and a WRESTLING HALL OF FAMER! Please welcome at a combined weight of ITSNOTMYJOBTOKNOWSUCHTHINGSBUTTHEY’REBIG! ANGEL TRINIDAD! ALECZANDER!  CAPITAL PUNISHMENT!

[He taps his foot and points to the entrance.]

Keeling:
THE HOSTILE ORDER OF STRONG SOLDIERS… TEAM HOSS!

[“Slam! (Bionyx remix)” by Onyx and Biohazard blasts through the arena and out from the back steps the three big men that were promised to the crowd.  Angel Trinidad was the tallest standing at 6’10” and close to 300 pounds with an olive complexion with black hair and a thin chin beard.  Aleczander was a British half-black, half-white wrestler with bright purple tights with the Team HOSS t-shirt; a big, strong muscle-bound brute standing 6’4” and pushing 270.  And Capital Punishment, the 47-year-old Hall of Famer from the old IWO was rocking a blood-red Team HOSS logo on his shirt; he stood 6’7” and tipped the scales at around 290.  Angel looked happy to be there, Aleczander flexed his muscles and Capital Punishment just stared blankly as all three walked to the ring.]

DDK:
These guys are HUGE!  This is quite a team here to DEFIANCE. Let’s see what they can do.

Angus:
Probably gas out after two minutes.

[The three brutes head to the ring one by one until they filled the ring.  The referee barely has any time to call for the bell when they go on the attack!  Angel goes after Vega, Aleczander tackles De La Cruz, and Capital Punishment is giving chase to Butcher Victorious.]

DDK:
Team HOSS wasting no time!  They’re all over these young lions here tonight!

Angus:
You might even say they… Pearl Harbored them?

[Junior Keeling watches the massacre begin in the ring as the crowd jeers Team HOSS for their unfair assault.  Cappy is now on top of Vega, pummeling the young SoCal native with a barrage of right hands.  Junior heads to the announce desk to ringside and put on a headset.]

Keeling:
Keelber, Angus, how’s it going?  You guys liking what you’re seeing in that ring right now?

DDK:
You’ve got a collection of talent lined up in that ring all right.

Angus:
I’ve seen better.

[Junior throws Angus an unmarked envelope and gestures for him to open it.  Mr. Skaaland humors Keeling and opens the flap.  As he does this, Angus’ eyes actually go wide and in a rare moment of silence, he is nearly speechless.]

Angus:
Go, TEAM HOSS!  FIVE STAR MATCH RIGHT THERE!

[I did say NEARLY.]

DDK:
What… what’s in there? Money?

[Angus looks again at the envelope and giggles uncontrollably.  Inside the ring, things are not looking too good for the members of Team Conclave even as the referee tries to restore order to the match.  Team HOSS has complete control as Vega is thrown into the corner by Cappy.  When Cappy comes running he ducks and runs over to make the tag, but De La Cruz is checking his face for scars while Butcher straight up avoids the tag.  The exasperated V Double turns around into The Rookie Monster Angel Trinidad with a boot to the face.  He pushes Vega back to the HOSS corner and he and Cappy launch him off to the ropes before they nearly KILL him dead with a Double Back Elbow to the face!]

[The beatings continue for poor Vega as Angel picks him up once before throwing him down with a Scoop Slam.  He pumps the crowd up with a fist and they only respond to the proud rookie with booing so he picks up Vega again… second Scoop Slam!  And a third!  He then runs off the ropes to deliver a big Splash that nearly crush the sternum of the SoCal native!]

Angus:
These guys are the shit, Keebler!  Talk about them!

Keeling:
They are!  Team HOSS are going to beat this kid down like they were Phil Spector after a night of drinking!

DDK:
These guys are certainly physical!

[Angel Trinidad tags into Aleczander The Great now and the Big Brit. Vega fights backand the 5’7” rookie kicks away at the legs of Aleczander and then follows up with a straight up thumb to the eye!  He doesn’t care that the referee is admonishing him, either.  With Aleczander stunned, he peppers him with a barrage of Forearm Smashes.  He runs to the ropes only to get caught by the Big Brit.  He hoists him over his head and actually SPINS him around in several rotations before he lets him fall hard to the ground!]

Keeling:
Damn!  That move is the HOSS Toss~

Angus:
Hoss TOSS!  That’s brilliant!  Brilliant, I tell you!  Fucking choice!

DDK:
… What HAPPENED to you?

[Aleczander picks up Vega while Jorge and Butcher each stand idly by on the ring apron hoping for a tag… but not really.  The HOSS members each line up in the ring and one by one, they BLAST him with a barrage of Corner Clotheslines until the kid is twitching in the corner, nearly convulsing from the beatdown.]

Keeling:
Operation: Bulldozer!  You see what I’ve got them doing here?  These guys are going to be running this division and making the other teams hold their jockstraps.

[Inside the ring the beatings continue as Capital Punishment is in the middle of the ring now.  He grabs Valentino and TOSSES him overhead with a brutal Gargoyle Suplex – a staple of his moveset.  Vega bounces across the ring like a pinball before he comes crashing into the corner.  Seeing an opportunity to capitalize, De La Cruz takes the opportunity and tags in to the match for the first time. ]

DDK:
Time to see what Jorge De La Cruz can do!

[He heads to the second rope and comes off with a Missile Dropkick that catches Cappy and knocks the big man down!]

[1… 2… no!]

Angus:
You can’t keep a Good HOSS down!

[De La Cruz takes the fight to the bigger Cappy and lands a few rights on the Hall of Famer before heading to the ropes and connecting with a Running Dropkick to the face that knocks him down a second time.  When he runs to the ropes again… TAG MADE BY BUTCHER!  De La Cruz is shocked while the opportunistic Butcher heads to the ring and tries for a School Boy roll-up on the big man!]

[1… 2… NO!]

[When his gambit fails, Butcher runs to the corner and tries to tag himself in, but De La Cruz refuses. Vega is hurt, but he limps off the ring.  It seems that his tag stealing and tag refusing have come back to bite him.  Meanwhile, Cappy is already back up.]

Capital Punishment:
Not smart.

[WILD right-armed Lariat nearly takes his head clean off!  Butcher is down and out while Jorge De La Cruz and Valentino Vega have all but abandoned him to his fate.]

DDK:
Team HOSS didn’t come here to play! And it seems the members of Bronson’s Conclave are in this for themselves!

Angus:
SAVE US, TEAM HOSS!  SAVE US FROM THIS PARALLEL WORLD WHERE EVERYTHING SUCKS DIC… wait. Where have I heard that before?

Keeling:
Oh, I think it’s these guys that need some saving right now.

[The crowd groans from the impact as Angel celebrates like he’d won the DEFIANCE Championship from Kai Scott. Capital Punishment taps him on the shoulder as Angel looks down at the fallen body of Butcher.  Aleczander looks down and grins like a child at Christmas. Something bad is about to happen.]

[The out-cold Victorious is lifted up by both Capital Punishment and Aleczander.  The two hand him over to Angel Trinidad’s waiting arms before they lift Butcher high in unison. The crowd is in awe at this point when Team HOSS SPIKES him into the canvas with a ring-shaking Triple-team Elevated Powerbomb!]

DDK:
Vulgar display of power!

Keeling:
Close… I can only call that… The Greatest Move in the HOSStory of Our Sport!

Angus:
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!  That’s an amazing name… itsnotbutIlikemoney AHAHAHAHAHA!

[Poor Butcher needs a toetag at this point.  As the legal man, The Rookie Monster places a foot on the chest of Victorious while beating his chest like a gorilla.]

[1… 2… 3!]

Quimbey:
Here are your winners of the match… CAPITAL PUNISHMENT, ALECZANDER, AND ANGEL TRINIDAD… TEAM HOSS!

DDK:
A DOMINANT win for Team HOSS!

Angus:
They need to wake up and smell the cash… coffee!  They’re fucking awesome!  You hear me, Keebler? AWESOME!

Keeling:
Fucking right, boys.  You’re gonna be seeing a lot more of that in the weeks to come! Philosopher Kings, Tres Brujas, Hookers-N-Blow, Dentari’s Legitimate Gorillas and anybody else that wants to step up to this… [pointing to the bodies in the ring] …that’s gonna be THEM.

[The Legitimate Businessman’s Club is open for business.]

[Sitting around one of those infamous unbreakable tables are Alceo Dentari, Tony Di Luca and Vincent Rinaldi. In their hands they hold playing cards, or at least Dentari and Rinaldi do. Tony Di Luca is slumped over a black hard backed ledger, sliding his pen up and down and across the open pages.]

Alceo Dentari:
Got any fours?

[Big Vinny looks through his cards silently before looking back up at Dentari with a back expression on his face.]

Alceo Dentari:
Fours, Vinny, yous got any fours?

[Still Vinny stares blankly at Dentari until Alceo pulls a four from his hand and flips it over to show the big man.]

Alceo Dentari:
See this? Yous got any a’ these?

[Nothing.]

[Heaving a sigh Dentari reaches out and tilts Vinny’s hand down so that he can see his cards.]

Alceo Dentari:
Fours! Damnit, Vinny yous got two a’ the bastards, see? Got fuck all else, but you got two damn fours!

[Dentari pulls the fours from Vinny’s hand and slots them into his own before tilting Vinny’s cards back up for him.]

Alceo Dentari:
Shit… I know you ain’t got nothin’ else I need, so I’m just gonna ask for a seven.

[Vinny stifles a yawn as Dentari picks a card out of the pool and slots it into his hand.]

Alceo Dentari:
Now, your turn...

[Di Luca looks up from his ledger and across the table to Dentari.]

Tony Di Luca:
You expectin’ Vinny to play go fish?

Alceo Dentari:
Well I tried teachin’ him poker, but the sonuvabitch weren’t fuckin’ listnin’.

[Vinny reaches out and grabs a hold of however many cards he can from Dentari’s hand and plucks them from his fingers.]

Alceo Dentari:
Damnit, Vinny. You gotta ask for somethin’! I ain’t got nothin’ you got, so you gotta take a card from there.

[Dentari snatches all of his cards back and puts Vinny’s hand on the pool between them. Vinny picks the top card up and lays it face down on the table in front of him.]

Alceo Dentari:
I fuckin’ give up.

[Alceo tosses his cards down on the table and turns to Rinaldi.]

Alceo Dentari:
At least Mr Bun the fuckin’ Baker weren’t in there this time.

[Di Luca forces a chuckle and looks back down at his ledger.]

Alceo Dentari:
So is this what yous had in mind for strengthenin’ the team, huh? Me an’ Vinny playin’ kids games while you catch up on your readin’?

[Tony sighs without looking up from the ledger.]

Tony Di Luca:
Actually, Alceo, I’m going over the books.

[Dentari scoffs.]

Alceo Dentari:
‘The books’? Ain’t that just a figure a’ speech?

Tony Di Luca:
No, Alceo, it’s not. It’s quite literal. It’s no wonder the business ain’t never taken off if you weren’t keeping records of nothin’.

[Alceo smiles smugly and taps the side of his head.]

Alceo Dentari:
It’s all up here.

Tony Di Luca:
But it aint! An’ that’s the problem with you, Alceo. There’s no plannin’, no structure, no nothin’! It’s all spur of the moment, it’s all off the cuff, it’s all a shambles…

Alceo Dentari:
A shambles?

[Di Luca nods slowly.]

Tony Di Luca:
You jump from goal to goal week by week. One week you wanna be the Trios Champion, then you wanna take down The Untouchables, then you just wanna beat on Heidi, then you wanna beat on Cancer, then you wanna be world champion… You try stirin’ too many pots with the same spoon an’ sooner or later everythin’ starts tastin’ the same… like shit.

.[Alceo sits back in his chair and folds his arms.]

Alceo Dentari:
That’s what yous think, huh?

[Tony shakes his head.]

Tony Di Luca:
No, Alceo. It’s what I know. You’re a passionate guy, I get that, but you keep pullin’ yourself in all these different directions an’ you ain’t gonna get nowhere. Hell, we ain’t gonna get nowhere. So we gotta focus on one thing an’ one thing only; Recapturin’ them Trios titles.

[Alceo crosses his legs and leans back even further in his chair. The confident smile on his face prefaces his next statement.]

Alceo Dentari:
We done it before an’ we done it without no books or nothin’.

[Tony lays the pen down on the ledger and fixes Dentari with a stare.]

Tony Di Luca:
An’ look where that got us. Are we sat here talkin’ ‘bout how we’re still champions? Or are we sat here talkin’ ‘bout how to get them belts back? No, Alceo, this time we’re gonna do it all proper.

[Di Luca slams shut his ledger and places a palm on top of it, almost to emphasize his point.]

Tony Di Luca:
An’ it starts tonight against Tres Brujas.

[Cut back to ringside.]

Angus:
Whaddaya think?

DDK:
About Di Luca?

Angus:
Yeah.

DDK:
Fuggheddahbahdhit!

[Cut backstage.]

[Charlene Crank walks into cVc’s locker room as his masseuse is giving him a happy ending. She lowers her head in shame and jealousy as she walks in.]

Charlene:
Chance… Here is the money.

[She hands the envelope as the masseuse finishes him off with a grunt. He counts the money.]

cVc:
This looks and feels a little light whore. These japanese boys at these shows are shorting you for handjobs and anal? A pro like you?

[Charlene lowers her head in shame even lower as the female who was massaging Crank exits his locker room.]

cVc:
Does that make you jealous? To see another woman please me like you can’t anymore… Does it?

[Charlene screams, “Fuck You!” and Chance slaps her hard across the face taking her down.]

cVc:
Fuck Me?

[He bends down to a balled up Charlene in the floor.]

cVc:
I think of that hole you sit on and call a pussy and feel ill. The only reason I am keeping you around is because I haven’t found someone who would will accept money to off you. I took you back just so that retarded fuck wouldn’t be hammering you with his pecker. I like the thought his broken heart enough to keep you around.

[Charlene begins to weep openly on the floor. Crank unzips his pants and begins urinating on her as she cries uncontrollably.]

cVc:
Haha… You are less than nothing. I am everything to you, the reason you keep on living is because you think one day “we” will work. This is the hell you signed up for when you decided to marry me. My grand daddy said to never shit in your own bed, but he never said anything about pissing on your own whore.

[Chance shakes as Charlene’s white shirt is now stained yellow. Crank zips up and bends down to her once more after retrieving a towel from his bag.]

cVc:
Dry off you are not useless after all. Just remember that you can tell the other slaves that at one time you were with the best to ever step between the ropes. Not some second rate has been like Curtis Penn but the real fucking deal, Chance Von Crank. I’m gonna beat Dewey tonight and its for you girl…

Charlene:
Other Slaves?

[A knock at the door startles Charlene after hearing this. Chance picks up Charlene from the floor using the towel to wipe her off as she continues to cry.]

cVc:
Come in.

[Two large Japanese men walk into the room and hand Crank a stack of money and he counts it as they look over Charlene real close. After he counts it he gives a thumbs up to the men and looks at Charlene.]

cVc:
I am not pulling as much money yet as I was in the states, Charlene… I read on wikipedia about the large sex trafficking in Japan and… Well I need money and you are in the way so I sold you to these gentlemen and you brought a pretty penny being a blonde american bitch. So I guess we are no longer married and that retard will never find you.

[The two men begin to haul her away as Crank walks up to Charene cupping her face in his hands.]

cVc:
I will become the biggest star in the world… Like I said brag about it when they rape you too many times or some shit, it will make you feel better. I never loved you, I only used you to further myself in my real true love… This business.

[The two men take her out of the room as Crank continues to count the stack of money the two paid him for Charlene. He walks over to the wall where a DEF TV poster is hanging. He takes a sharpie out and crosses out Python on the poster. He then draws another “X” across Eugene Dewey and then circles himself. Cut to ringside.]

DDK:
Well now.

Angus:
Yeah, that was a little... something.

DDK:
Hard to watch?

Angus:
Yeah. Heh.

DDK:
What?

Angus:
You get hard watching Chance Von Crank!

DDK:
WHY YOU LITTLE-

[Darren chokes Angus, Homer Simpson-style.]

Darren “DQ” Quimbey:
The following contest is scheduled for one fall, with a 20 minute time limit.

[The synthesized opening to “Black” by Sevendust cuts into the air as the curtains part, beckoning the arrival of Tyrone Walker, who bursts into the arena upon the sound of the soulful voice of Sevendust’s frontman, Lajon Witherspoon.]

Darren “DQ” Quimbey:
Introducing first, from Jacksonville, Florida by way of Queens, New York, standing 6 feet 2 inches tall and weighing in at 205 pounds, he is one third of HOOKERS AND BLOW and is the BLACK JESUS… TYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYRRRRRROOOOONNNNNNNE WAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLKKKKKEEERRRR!!

[Walker strides towards the ring, slapping fives with fans before taking a few quick steps and leaping from the floor to the ring apron. Vaulting over the top rope, Walker runs the ropes a few times, bouncing to a stop in the center of the ring where he awaits his opponent.]

DDK:
What a difference a few months make, before Ty was a nervous bundle of energy before his return match versus Heidi Christensen, and now he seems to be 100 percent back in tune with the game.

Angus::
I for one never had a single doubt that he would be, but of course, I’m a believer.

DDK:
Among other things.

[Walker’s music slowly fades out, making way for "You Won't See Me Coming" by Jean-Jacques Burnel.]

Darren “DQ” Quimbey:
And his opponent, hailing from Monte Cristo, standing at 5 feet 11 inches tall and weighing in at 231 pounds, he is the GENTLEMEN BRAWLER, EDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE DAAAAAANNNNNTTEEEEEE!!

[Dante makes his way to the ring, the entire time his eyes are locked with those of his opponent, who still stands in the center of the ring. Before long, Eddie Dante arrives at ring side and ascends the stairs before stepping into the ring. He goes face to face with Walker and the two start jawing at each other, causing the ref to get between them and ordering them to their corners.]

DDK:
Certainly no lack of hostility here.

Angus::
Ring the bell and lets kick this pig!

[With the bell rung, Ty and Dante stare each other down from the across the ring as they slowly begin to approach the other. Breaking the ice, Walker is the first to make a move and shoots in on Dante, but he’s quick to dodge the attempt at his legs with a smirk and mouths “too slow, old man”.]

DDK:
Well, this is certainly going to be a friendly contest.

Angus::
Bah, we’ll see, it’s going to be friendly for one of these guys.

[Ty sneers and they continue to circle, this time with Dante trying to shoot in. The slightly shorter, younger, and more muscular Dante gets in close, but Ty manages to sprawl and attempts to take Eddie’s back, who scrambles away quickly before Walker could gain the advantage. Backing away, Dante stares back at Ty, who only continues to sneer at him.]

Angus::
How’s that for slow, you muscled up midget?

DDK:
I see your favoritism for all things Team Danger has a passport.

Angus::
Never leave home without it.

[Closing in again, they opt for the old school collar and elbow tie up. Ducking low, Dante drives a knee into Walker’s gut before taking him down with a side headlock and cranking it in tight. Ty grumbles as Dante continues to crank on it. Trying to break free from it, Ty rolls Eddie back on to his shoulders for a pin, but Dante recovers position after a one count.]

DDK:
You know, I’ve always felt the headlock was an underrated hold, simple but effective.

Angus::
At putting me to sleep, yeah.

[Walker tries again, but doesn’t get more than another one count. Dante responds by breaking his grip and starts to grind the knuckles of his free hand against Ty’s face, which only serves to aggravate the Black Jesus. Walker starts to fight his way back to a standing position, all the while Dante continues to crank the headlock.]

Angus::
You know, it occurred to me that Dante is targeting Ty’s neck.

DDK:
Insightful as always, Angus:.

[Dante tries to toss him back over with the headlock, but Walker doesn’t play along and tries to hoist him up for a suplex, but Dante cranks the hold again causing Ty to grunt in pain. Finally Ty figures a way out as he begins to fire forearms into Dante back and side which gets him to break his hold. Capitalizing, Ty muscles Dante up for the Black Thunder, but Dante counters out with a hurricanrana.]

DDK:
Nice heads up counter there by, Dante.

Angus::
Please, he bored Ty into a coma with a headlock.

[Scrambling around, Dante is up first and goes on the attack, but as he charges in he gets caught with a dropkick as Walker suddenly bursts up to catch him. Following up, Ty swarms a rising Dante with a flurry of knees and elbows, backing him into a corner. Ty continues to blast away alternating with elbows, palms and kicks, some of which Dante manages to block or deflect as he covers up.]

Angus::
YEAH!! Beat dat ass, Ty, beat it!

DDK:
Have I ever mentioned how much of a pillar of professionalism that you are?

Angus::
No, but you really should do it more often.

[Shifting gears, Ty whips Dante across the ring into the opposite corner. Dante however, side steps out of the way of a Stinger Splash only for Walker to land his feet on the middle ropes before hitting a momentarily unaware Dante with a dropkick that sends him tumbling to the mat face first. Popping up, Ty mugs it up for the crowd as he hollars “HOOKERS AND BLOW!” which gets an amused reaction from some of the crowd.]

Angus::
HOOKERS AND BLOW!!

[Turning his attention back to Dante, Walker stalks over to his opponent, but this time it’s Dante coming from out of nowhere with a small package that barely gets a two count. Both are quickly up, Dante tries for a European Uppercut only for Ty to counter into a backslide, that almost gets a two count.]

Angus::
SCRAMBLEMANIA!

[Ty tries to whip Dante into the ropes, but Eddie turns the tables and takes Walker down with a crucifix that, yet again, only barely gets a two count. Dante doesn’t let up, quickly catching Walker with a La Magistral Cradle, but only a one count. Dante yet again tries for something as he catches Walker doubled over only for Ty to sweep out his legs before rolling forward with a cradle pin that only gets a two count.]

DDK:
Round and round they go, where they stop, no one knows.

[They scramble around again, Ty rushes Dante, who has his back turned and gets driven against the ropes before Walker pulls back and rolls him up with a back rolling cradle that gets another close two count as Dante kicks him off. Walker rolls forward as Dante scampers back to his feet. Turning they both hold up as they see the other is ready for the next round, all the while the audience applauding their efforts.]

DDK:
What an impressive display by Walker and Dante.

Angus::
And these people are giving them the love for it.

[Circling, they converge with another lockup, this time Ty taking control as he leverages Dante back against the ropes. The ref calls for a clean break and Walker obliges, but not without throwing some unfavorable words at Dante. Shoving him back, Dante closes in and locks up with Walker again, this time it’s his turn to push his man back. Again the ref asks for a clean break, but Dante rears back and clocks Walker across the face with an open hand.]

DDK:
What a blatant show of disrespect.

Angus::
Disrespect? He just slapped the shit-take out of him.

DDK:
You know those are mushrooms, right?

Angus::
What are?

DDK:
Shittake, it’s pronounced shi-tah-kay, they’re…

Angus::
Dude, nobody cares.

[Dante backs away as he taunts Ty, who rushes him and gets caught with an inverted atomic drop followed by a flying forearm that puts Walker on the mat. Diving on him for a pin, Dante gets a two count. Not wasting time, Dante immediately gets back to work, as he sits Ty up and puts a knee into his back before grabbing a chin lock.]

DDK:
Dante again looking to torque the neck, Ty’s notorious weak spot.

[Grimacing in pain, Walker doesn’t take long to try and fight his way out of the predicament. Getting to his feet, Walker breaks free with a few elbows to Dante’s gut, but as he comes running off the ropes, Dante catches him with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. Turning him over, Dante locks on a camel clutch, continuing to focus on Walker’s neck.]

DDK:
Dante just seems to have Walker’s number here.

Angus::
Jay-zuss, it’s like he’s trying to turn him into a pez dispenser.

[Dante starts calling for the ref to check on Walker, who when asked if he wants to give it up, responds with a definitive “NO!” while at the same time digging and clawing towards the ropes. Dante lets go of the hold and then banzai drops his weight across Ty’s back before locking in the hold again.]

Angus::
Did someone give this guy cheat codes or something? He’s got Ty beat at every turn right now.

DDK:
I don’t know about that, but Ty certainly isn’t short on what these fans call “fighting spirit”.

[Feeling the desperation, Walker gets his arms free and pulls himself to the ropes with Dante still cranking back on his head. Getting to the ropes, the ref calls for Dante to break the hold, but it doesn’t matter as Ty doesn’t stop at the ropes, using them to climb up with Dante still on his back. Reaching down, Walker holds Dante’s legs up before falling back and crushing him against the mat with all of his of his weight on top of him.]

DDK:
Walker with an imaginative escape there.

Angus::
Alright, Ty! Lets get this back into our favor.

DDK:
Our favor? I don’t see you in there getting beat on.

Angus::
Hey, we all do our parts. For instance, I’m sitting here carrying you on commentary.

[With both down on the mat, Walker turns his neck as he tries to stretch it out, while Dante tries to regain his breath. Ty is up first and he goes over to pull Dante up, hitting him with a few clubbing shots to the back of his shoulders, but Dante suddenly comes back to life and lashes out with an elbow square to Ty’s head. Rocking back, Ty responds with an elbow of his own, which earns another in response from Dante.]

Angus::
SLUGFEST!!

[Ty scores with a leg kick, Eddie responds with a chop. Ty hits another leg kick, Eddie gets another chop. Kick, chop, kick, chop, kick, chop. Ty changes up scores with a kick to the body that visibly makes Dante cringe, and then another, and another, and another, until Ty tries for a high round house that Dante ducks only to eat a back spinning...]

Angus::
PIMPU SLAPPA!

[Dante now rocks back and returns fire with an open hand of his own, which is returned in kind by Walker. Slap, slap, slap, slap, slap, slap, they continue to fire away, each successive blow making sweat explode off of their heads. The barrage continues, almost endlessly it seems, all the while the crowd cheering the fighting spirit on display before them.]

DDK:
Dante and Walker are absolutely brutalizing each other.

Angus::
Like they stole something.

[The two way assault finally hits a bump when Dante, switching it up, throws a boot into Walker’s gut and follows up with a European Uppercut. Stumbling back, Walker has the presence of mind to duck a wildly swung clothesline and delivers the…]

DDK:
Blue Thunder!

Angus::
Damnit, that’s not what it’s called!

DDK:
Fine, Black Thunder, better?

Angus::
Yes!

ONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNE……

TWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWO……...

THRRRRRRRRRRRRRR…..NO!

[Walker looks to the ref, but doesn’t waste time arguing the call. Pulling Dante off of the mat, Ty whips him into the ropes before bouncing off the ropes on the opposite side, however they both had the same idea. Flying Forearm. The collision sending them crashing to the mat, yet they both pop up quickly, but it’s Walker who scores with the…]

DDK:
Rydeen Bomb!

Angus::
Get it right, BLACKOUT BOMB!

DDK:
It’s literally the same thing!

[Indeed it is, Ty popping Dante up and dropping him with his variation of a sitout powerbomb/spinebuster. Ty however, doesn’t go for the pin, heading out to the apron he springs up on to the top rope and comes crashing down with the springboard senton and uses the momentum to roll with it into the ropes and hit the springboard moonsault from the other side.]

Angus::
DEATH FROM ABOVE, an oldie, but goodie…

[Spoke too soon.]

DDK:
Dante gets the knees up!

[His ribs crunching down on the raised knees, Ty rolls around on the mat clutching his midsection. Meanwhile, Dante tries to shake the cobwebs. A moment passes and both start to get back into it, with Dante stalking over to Ty, who rears back and blasts him in the gut with a kick and then tries to scoop slam him for the Blackimus Driver, but Dante escapes and slides back behind Walker and grabs a waistlock…]

DDK:
German Suplex and a bridge…

ONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNE……

TWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWO……

THREEEEEEE….NOO!!!

[Dante looks to the ref, his eyes wide in shock, but the ref assures him that the count was only a two, a close two, but a two none the less. Getting up, Dante pulls Walker up by his afro before waistlocking him again, but reaches down to cradle between the legs and…]

DDK:
What an impact! Eddie Dante with a Tear-Drop Suplex.

Angus::
He dropped Ty directly on top of his skull, Keebs, and he’s been aiming for his neck all night.

DDK:
And Dante is looking to capitalize here…

[Turning Walker over face first and squatting over his back, he locks in Virtue’s Vice and just cranks back as hard as he can with it.]

Angus::
Dragon Clutch and… baw gawd, he’s trying to break him in half!

DDK:
I believe it’s called the Virtue’s Vice, Angus:, how about you try getting it right.

Angus::
Hey, nobody likes a knowitall, fag.

[For Ty’s part, he goes from dazed to agony in less than 60 seconds faster than your favorite European super sports car. Ty flails his free arm, not even acknowledging the ref who is asking if he wants to give it up. Digging in, Ty manages to pull his knees up to give himself better leverage and desperately crawls towards the ropes. With the fans cheering Walker’s effort to get his escape, he reaches the ropes to a huge round of applause.]

DDK:
What heart.

Angus::
He may be an old bastard now, but he’s one of the toughest bastards around.

[Dante however refuses to break and violently cranks on the hold, only breaking until the ref gets super close to reaching his five count and then gets pulled away and reprimanded for not following the refs command. Meanwhile, this gives Walker time to recover and when he gets to his feet, going completely on instinct, he rushes at Dante who pushes the ref aside and pops Ty up…]

DDK:
ENDGAME!!

[Dante looks to score with the super European Uppercut, but Ty adjusts in mid-air and thrusts his feet into Dante’s face before he crashes to the mat.]

Angus::
DENIED!!

[Ty and Dante scramble back to their feet, and Dante swings with a clothesline that Walker ducks before rushing to the ropes and launching himself off of the rebound.]

Angus::
BOOM!!

DDK:
Walker scores the BLACKOUT!

ONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNE!!!!!

TWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWO!!!

THHHHHHHHHHHRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR-NO!!

[Ty rises up and gestures for his own killshot before hooking Dante up with the textbook suplex, but Dante avoids the Ol’ Dirty Buster by twisting out of the suplex in mid-air, but as he lands behind Walker, Ty has the wherewithal to catch Dante with a cradle…]

DDK:
VICTORY ROLL!!

ONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNE!!!

TWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWO!!!!!!!

THHHHHHHHHHRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEE!!

**DING!!** **DING!!** **DING!!**

Darren “DQ” Quimbey:
And your winner of the match, by pinfall, TYROOOOOOONE WAAALLLLLKKEERRRRR!!

[Walker lets go and rolls back and away from Dante, before getting to his feet and stomping around the ring. He approaches Dante, the whole time his mouth running with, lets say, a forecast of what the future holds for the Philosopher Kings and their long term future as DEFIANCE Trios Champions, among other, not so friendly, criticisms.]

DDK:
Ty certainly has a lot to say, not exactly being gracious in victory here tonight.

Angus::
If you don’t like it, don’t lose a match to the man after trying to call the guy out. Simple.

DDK:
Still, being a “sore winner” isn’t necessary.

Angus::
Whatever, Keebs.

[Not one to simply stand still and be disrespected, Dante gets in Ty’s face and jaws back at him with similar fury and commentary in regards to what he actually thinks of Walker. Before this can escalate any further, the ref gets between them. Heeding the officials demands, they separate, still staring back until Dante bails from the ring first, though he keeps his eyes on Walker until he’s further up the aisle.]

Rainwood:
Hello my lovely Defiance fans,

[The big screen light up, and once again we see one Jeremiah Rainwood, looking rather relaxed. Today’s scene of choice, a mountain hot springs which we can assume is somewhere in Japan. Either side of him sit too rather larger sumo type gentlemen staring dead ahead. Rainwood lies back, arms out stretched behind his two new friends and continues to speak. ]

Rainwood:
Now I know what you’re thinking, and it’s a number of very reasonable questions so I’m going to answer them one by one.

First up Mr. Rainwood, why the hell do you always seem to cut promos in large vats of warm water whilst wearing little to no clothes? To that my friend I’d say because my body’s so fine that I’m letting the world appreciate it... [Rainwood cuts a cheesy poserish grin for a second] pah, nah just messing with you. The real reason is as you may have noticed, being chilled out is kinda my thang, and well if there ain’t something relaxing about having your having hot water gently heating yah and making you feel all warm and tingly inside, you sir are lacking one soul.

Secondly, why aren’t you here, in this fine venue in Saitama getting your fighting gloves on and taking on one of Defs finest wrestlers in a match which would be so electrifying it would be like shoving livewire down your longjohns? Well Dane’s kindly given me the week off, so I thought I’d meet some of the locals, and these two fine gentlemen have been teaching me how to bring the fight to people Japanese styley for the past couple of hours and now we’ve hit the springs to losen the old muscles, but don’t you worry, you’ll all get to see my not so pretty face in a ring next week.

Which leads me nicely to the final question, Rainwood, could you stop your damn ramblings for just one little minute and get to the point of this whole shebang? And I’d say fair play to y’all, I’ll give it to you straight. Yesterday, I found tacked to my hotel room door, a letter. Well when I say a letter I mean a long rant that happened to be in handwritten form but we’ll call it a letter for clarity. See the letter was from my good friend and current sparring partner Lash Grahams’ Uncle. I’ve got it here in fact...

[Rainwood brings one of his arms from behind one sumos back with several sheets of paper in them. Each seemingly scrawled on in handwritten cursive front to back]

Rainwood:
See this letter goes on to say many slanderous things about me, saying I cheated his boy out of a victory somehow last week, how his boy was going to destroy me and tear me apart, how his boy was a force to be reckoned with and shouldn’t be fighting jobbers like me. How he doesn’t even know why Dan keeps giving me favours and employing me in this wrestling institution and all in all it was all pretty hurtful stuff. But hey, you people say bad things in the heat of the moment.

The one thing that he then goes on to say however, somewhere near the end, and I’m paraphrasing here cause this thing was at least 10 pages long so I was skimming by the end of it, that I’m a coward if I don’t face his boy in the ring again for a deciding match, running scared from the brilliance of his boy Lash Graham. 

And I can agree that your boy is brilliant, he’s a damn fine fighter but if you’d actually have spoke to your boy, you’d have known I said we should have a rematch after to decide it all anyway. I said to him, “we can’t leave the defiance faithful without one last show-stopping match to leave them knowing who got the victory in our little exchange”. And I’m a man of my word, so I spoke to Dane and we have ourselves that last deciding match next week live on Def TV. So people of Japan be ready for that.

And Uncle Gray, please chill out a little. I can respect you wanting to do your best by your boy but this is getting a little obsessive...

[Rainwoods face flickers to serious for once before immediately back to his usual crooked smile]

Rainwood out!

[Screen cuts to black]

[Never before had Eugene had such a look for frustration upon his face as he does right now. His brow is furrowed, his teeth are bared, he’s sweating, he’s cursing under his breath, he’s almost putting his fist through the table he’s sat at… in fact the only reason he hasn’t done that already is because he’s got his 3DS open and switched on in his hands.]

Eugene Dewey:
Ungh!

[A few more agonising seconds pass with Eugene wincing and groaning until the door to his locker room swings open and a familiar face enters.]

[And this face is familiar because it looks a lot like Eugene’s only way greasier and still substantially thinner.]

Wayne Dewey:
Hey there big bro! How’s it going?

[Eugene looked up from the 3DS to his brother and snarled.]

Eugene Dewey:
What do you want?

[Wayne held his hands up and simply smiled back.]

Wayne Dewey:
Just a chat, dude. Or is it not a good time?

[Eugene shook his head.]

Eugene Dewey:
For you it’s never a good time.

[But Wayne wasn’t going to listen to that and grabbed the chair propped up against the wall. He unfolded it and took a seat opposite Eugene.]

Wayne Dewey:
You look tense, Eugene. Are you tense?

[Eugene didn’t answer.]

Wayne Dewey:
What’s bothering you, Gene?

[Eugene looked up at his brother again and sighed.]

Eugene Dewey:
Right now, you.

Wayne Dewey:
Oh, come now, bro. You’re not mad about last week, are you?

[Eugene didn’t answer, instead he sat there staring at the dual screens before him.]

Wayne Dewey:
Look, as you probably heard earlier, Seth’s my new client…

[No response.]

Wayne Dewey:
After we parted ways I took some time and got my shit together… I set up my own agency… I’ve got loads of clients on the books across loads of sports… nobody huge… until Seth, that is.

[Still no response.]

Wayne Dewey:
Dude… what the hell are you doing on there?

[Wayne folded the screen of the 3DS down and looked at it confusedly.]

Wayne Dewey:
Dude… didn’t that come out like a week ago?

[Finally Eugene replied.]

Eugene Dewey:
I don’t know who to pick… I really want Fennekin, but then I get to choose a Kanto starter as well, and I want Charmander there. And then there’s the event Torchic... three fire types aren’t going to make sense, I’d rather have Froakie over Chespin, but then at the same time I’d rather have Squirtle over Bulbasaur… I can’t go walking around with a fire and two waters, can I? I mean, I’ll have them all one day hopefully provided there’s the transfer lab somewhere, but I don’t know wh...

[Eugene spoke stoically at first, but as the passion for Pokémon took over he couldn’t help but talk to his brother just like old times. Of course, once he realised what he was doing he soon clammed up again.]

Wayne Dewey:
See man, we can be friends, can’t we?

[Eugene sighed again.]

Eugene Dewey:
You don’t get it, do you Wayne? You didn’t want me to be a success unless you could claim to have been the driving force behind it, and when you thought I was going to go somewhere else you got sand all up in your vagina and tried to guilt me into staying with you. You backed yourself into a corner and couldn’t get out of it and save face, so you quit. But you didn’t just quit, did you?

[Eugene finally sets the 3DS down on the table and fixes his brother with an intense stare.]

Eugene Dewey:
You tried to turn it all around on me one last time and you tried to make yourself the victim when you clearly weren’t.

Wayne Dewey:
I was the victim!

Eugene Dewey:
No you weren’t!

Wayne Dewey:
I WAS! I put so much time and effort into making you a star… Who was up at night googling your opponents for you? Who was at ringside for every match leading the cheers and providing the advice? Who made all the bookings and all the flight arrangements? Who made sure you got where you needed to be? ME! And how was I thanked?

[Wayne stood up from his chair and leaned across the table at his brother.]

Wayne Dewey:
You said “I think I need someone else to help me.” and you went off to get played by Cancer Jiles and beaten by Bronson Box. If you’d stuck with me you’d have beaten Box for a third straight time… You’d have been  the Master of Wrestling… Hell, by now you’d have won the World title.

Eugene Dewey:
I earned a shot at that by myself.

Wayne Dewey:
And you lost by yourself as well. That wouldn’t have happened with me, and that’s what I’m here to offer.

[Eugene looked at his brother with a hint of confusion in his eyes.]

Eugene Dewey:
What?

Wayne Dewey:
Sign up with me. We’ll be a team again. You, Seth and I would be unstoppable together.

Eugene Dewey:
Sign up with you? Are you serious?

Wayne Dewey:
Hell yeah I am.

Eugene Dewey:
I’d rather play Superman 64.

Wayne Dewey:
Woah, don’t be so hasty, Euge.

Eugene Dewey:
I’m not being hasty. I will never joi-

[Suddenly things take a dark turn as Wayne interrupts his brother with a much deeper tone of voice.]

Wayne Dewey:
Seriously man, really think about this offer...

[Wayne stands up and placed his hands on the table between he and his brother. He leans in and whispers to Eugene.]

Wayne Dewey:
Life could get very difficult if you say no.

[Finally Wayne smiles a toothy grin again and claps his brother on the shoulder before turning to leave the locker room.]

Eugene Dewey:
Hey, Wayne!

[Wayne stops in his tracks and turns back with an expectant grin on his face. It doesn’t last long though.]

Eugene Dewey:
Don’t let the door hit you on your way out.

[Cut back to the commentation station.]

DDK:
Well, I guess that answers that question.

Angus:
Yup.

DDK:
How did Curtis Penn get in the ring?

Angus:
I'unno. Magnets.

DDK:
May as well see what he's got to say.

[Curtis Penn stands, arms cross, center ring.]

Penn:
That lil’ shit.

[Words were never spoken with more pure venom.]

Penn:
He tried to embarrass me at the Kawasaki Club by pulling a handful of tights for the cheap victory.

[As history would have it, Curtis was actually the one who was using cheap tactics to win fast and malicious, Alston pulled out the victory by using Curts’ own momentum for a quick roll up victory.]

Penn:
What type of HONOR lies in a sneaky, underhanded, cheap victory like that?

[His beard lifts as a smile stretches across his face.]

Penn:
Tucker G. Alston is a man with no honor, who fights not head on, but with schemes and treachery! That goes against the Bushido code…

[Curtis has been known to askew history and facts a smudge, but now he is trying to win their following by twisting and turning their ancestral moral code and compass.]

Penn:
I’m bold… brash…even a little cocky sometimes, but I have never resorted to trickery to injury, harm, or maim an opponent.

[Naw, just the occasional false lead in to a handshake, followed by a beat down, and then followed by an arm bar the he just wouldn’t release. Curtis Penn is your prime example of Honor. ]

Penn:
I have always been this smashed mouth warrior, not once have I tried to deceive anyone, not like Tucker Alston did to me at the Kawasaki Club. Now, I know Alston is not here tonight so I’m not going to call him out and try to fight him tonight, but I want you all to take notice…

[He points towards the crowd and waves his hands at the empty ramp.]

Penn:
That Tucker G. Alston is the type of champion that after he receives a victory one week, sits at home drinking his Champagne and eating his caviar the next; instead of being here to fight another opponent.

[Well he would more than likely be here if Curtis did not try and rip his arm completely off of his body and try and bludgeon him with his own limb.]

Penn:
The man has no Loyalty to his fan base, he has no Honor as a warrior, and he stands against the Bushido Code.

Boo….

Boo…

Boo…

[Penn lips curl and gives his straight face a look of deviousness.]

Penn:
You should boo him, he is a champion and he should be here to fight… for his honor, to win ya’lls loyalty, to respect the Bushido Code and be a warrior that the So Her Championship needs!

[The building begins to rumble with boos and hisses from the crowd. They begin to chant Alston’s name. ]

Awwston….Clap…clap…clap

Awwston….Clap…clap…clap

Awwston….Clap…clap…clap

Awwston….Clap…clap…clap

Awwston….Clap…clap…clap

[This displeases Curtis.]

Awwston….Clap…clap…clap

Awwston….Clap…clap…clap

Awwston….Clap…clap…clap

Awwston….Clap…clap…clap

Awwston….Clap…clap…clap

 [He waits for the chorus to die off before he lifts the microphone back to his lips.]

Boo….

Boo…

Boo…

[His lips curl again.]

Penn:
If no one else wants to Honor the Bushido Code I will! I will do it justice..Tucker…

Boo….

Boo…

Boo…

[The crowd cannot take his coaxing and rally off boos that block the words that he utters into the microphone.]

Penn:
…….

Awwston….Clap…clap…clap

Awwston….Clap…clap…clap

Awwston….Clap…clap…clap

Awwston….Clap…clap…clap

Awwston….Clap…clap…clap

[He inspects the microphone and brings it back up to restate his proposal.]

Penn:
Alston wine and dine this week, live it up, but the next time you see me, I’ll be standing across from you and I’ll be taking your SoHer Championship from you.

[At the entrance ramp, the shaggy haired Tucker appears; a stern looked etched on his face and a microphone in hand.]

Awwston….Clap…clap…clap

Awwston….Clap…clap…clap

Awwston….Clap…clap…clap

Awwston….Clap…clap…clap

Awwston….Clap…clap…clap

[He looks towards the microphone in hand and back to the ring, Curtis is fuming and frothing, Tucker charges the ring, Curtis leaps over the top rope, they clash midway up the ramp. Blows are thrown, teeth are clinched, but DEF SEC is there to pry the men apart before too much damage is delt.]

[Tucker raises his hands and backs off as does Curtis, no sooner than DEF Sec stands down Curtis lunges for another attack, but is quickly wrapped up and pressed into the ring barrier. Tucker reaches down and picks up the dropped microphone.]

Alston:
Curtis, if you want another shot at the Southern Heritage Championship, you’re on!

[He drops the microphone and walks backwards up the ramp to the sound of his name.]

Awwston….Clap…clap…clap

Awwston….Clap…clap…clap

Awwston….Clap…clap…clap

Awwston….Clap…clap…clap

Awwston….Clap…clap…clap

[Curtis just smiles with evil intent as he is escorted from ringside.]

Angus:
I can't believe I just sat through that.

[Cut.]

Darren “DQ” Quimbey:
The following contest is a trios tag team match, and it is set for one fall!  Introducing first!  

[Cue The Sword.]

Quimbey:
Hailing from Tampa, Florida, and weighing in at 144 lbs, LISA! LOEH!  From Waterbury, Vermont, and weighing in at 161 lbs, DIANE! PARKER!  And from Kingston, Jamaica, weighing in at 141 lbs - CLAIRA! SAINT! SUUURE!  Together, they are former Defiance Trios Tag Champions.  Representing the Truly Untouchables -  they are TREEEESSSS… BRUUUUUUUUUUJJJJAAAASSS!!!!

[Claira St. Sure is first out.  She’s wearing a boxing style robe, open in the front, and her shorts are cut low below the waist to better show off dem abs.  Diane Parker, whose wrestling style is pretty no-nonsense, follows her.  Lisa Loeh is last out, and she stops to do one of those sorta-dances where she twitches her hips violently from one side to the other.  Claira and Diane are most of the way to the ring before she stops and follows them.]

[In the ring, Claira doffs her robe, Diane tests the ropes, and Lisa does a supposedly exotic straddle-dance on the top rope that reeks of trying too hard.]

Quimbey:
And their opponents!  Hailing collectively from the Bronx, New York City, and weighing in at a combined 762 lbs! ‘Big Vinny’ Vincent Rinaldi!  Tony ‘Two Hands’ De Luca!  And Alceo Dentari!  Also former Defiance World Trios Champions!  They are THE LEGITIMATE BUSINESSMEN’S SOCIAL CLUB!

[Alceo Dentari is scowling.]

[Tony Two-Hands is walking next to him, not behind him.  This is of significance.]

[Vincent Rinaldi is still fat, and he walks in the back.]

[Dentari stomps into the ring, his stomp interrupted by the necessity of hopping to get over the middle rope.  He starts straight after the Brujas, only to be held back by Hector Navarro.]

[On one side of the ring Dentari and Di Luca both pat Rinaldi on the back and exit to the apron. On the other the Brujas confer. Claira starts to enter, Diane holds her back and pushes Lisa, Lisa starts to argue but then steps under the bottom ropes.  Lisa turns to face her opponent as Claira and Diane exit the ring and the bell sounds.]

Ding Ding Ding!

[Lisa starts by trying to pose, but somehow any implications are lost on Rinaldi.  He closes the gap on Loeh and tries to tie up with her, but Lisa ducks the attempt and goes behind Rinaldi. Vinny turns as Lisa puts some more distance between the two and smiles. Lisa smiles right back and charges at Rinaldi, sliding along the mat between his legs and shoots up behind him. Lisa jumps hitting a picture perfect dropkick to the spine of Rinaldi which he shrugs off. Vinny turns and catches Lisa by the head and neck as she’s getting back to her feet and delivers a ‘big’ headbutt the back of her neck. Lisa tries to fight back and throws a wild hand into Rinaldi’s midsection but Vinny’s power is too much and he grabs Loeh by the throat and throws her across the ring into the LBC’s corner.]

DDK:
It’s no wonder Rinaldi’s overpowering Lisa, the girl’s giving up about 220lbs to the big man.

Angus:
That’s about 2 of you.

[Rinaldi waddles his way to the corner where Lisa landed and grabs hold of the leg she sticks out, trying to kick him in the gut. Vinny uses that leg to drag Lisa out of the corner before dropping it and grabbing her by the neck again. Vinny pulls Lisa to her feet before Gorilla pressing her above his head. Rinaldi holds her up for a good few seconds before slamming her to the mat and hitting the ropes. Vinny comes back and jumps, looking to hit a big splash but Lisa rolls out of the way, leaving Rinaldi with nothing but mat to connect with.]

DDK:
Rinaldi almost left Lisa as a grease spot on the canvas!

Angus:
And she’s out of the ring… and here comes Claira!

[St. Sure enters the ring and charges at Rinaldi, who instantly backs off into his own corner.]

DDK:
Looks like Rinaldi wants nothing to do with the former FIST of DEFIANCE.

Angus:
I can see someone who does though.

[Dentari reaches over the top rope and tags himself into the match, ignoring Di Luca’s protests and charges straight at Claira. St. Sure drops Alceo with a drop toe hold. She adjusts her position quickly and tries to lock in an STF, but Dentari manages to quickly claw his way to the ropes. Claira ignores Hector Navarro’s count up until four and backs off to allow Dentari up to his feet. Alceo gets up, straightens his waistcoat and brushes himself down as he and Claira circle the ring.]

DDK:
I’m not surprised Dentari wants to get his hands on Claira after what happened at Ascension and at the last show.

Angus:
Looks like it’s Claira getting her hands on Dentari right now though…

[After trying up in the middle of the ring Claira gets the better of Alceo and goes behind, taking him to the mat with a waist lock takedown. Claira floats over into a front facelock but Alceo pushes up onto his knees and alleviates some of the pressure. Alceo continues to push up to his feet and backs Claira into a neutral corner where he breaks the hold with a shoulder to the midsection. Dentari pulls back and drives in another shoulder but Claira jumps, wraps her legs around Alceo’s arms and rolls him up in a pin for two. Dentari scrambles to get to his feet, but Claira’s up before him and lashes out with a kick that catches Dentari flush in the side of the head.]

[Alceo doesn’t drop to the mat but he is certainly stunned from the kick, giving Claira enough time to grab an arm, jump, wrap her legs around his neck and lock in a Triangle choke. Alceo’s free hand claws at Claira’s legs trying to break the hold before moving to a position dangerously close to the mat!]

DDK:
Claira’s got that Triangle Choke locked in tight! Dentari might be about to tap!

[Tony Di Luca isn’t going to wait around to find out and enters the ring, stomping down on the shoulder of Claira to break the hold. Hector Navarro steps in and tries to usher Di Luca out of the ring, but he ignores her commands and continues to stomp away at Claira St. Sure. Diane Parker isn’t going to stand for this and enters the ring herself, charging at Di Luca, jumping over Claira and Dentari to hit a running front dropkick. Almost instantly Vincent Rinaldi decides he’s coming in, and Lisa’s not going to be the only one out on the apron and  so jumps in over the top rope. Lisa’s speedy entrance means she’s able to cut Rinaldi off just as he’s straightening up after stepping through the ropes and she hits a Kenka kick to the side of Vinny’s face before jumping up on him and looking for a headscissor!]

Angus:
She couldn’t take the big man down, could she?

[No she couldn’t as Rinaldi simply throws Lisa off to the side and down to the mat. Rinaldi ignores Loeh for the moment and heads right for Diane Parker, who has driven Di Luca into a corner and is unleashing a flurry of kicks to the legs and body of the medium sized man. Vinny grabs Diane by the hair and pulls her back, landing a headbutt to the back of her head and knocks her down to the mat. Rinaldi reaches out a hand and pulls Di Luca to his feet just as Claira charges in and lifts a knee into the back of Rinaldi, pushing him into the corner and squashing Di Luca against the turnbuckles!]

DDK:
Rinaldi’s size and weight worked against his own team there! That’s not what you want!

[Claira takes advantage over the shocked Rinaldi by delivering a stiff straight kick to the back of his leg, knocking the big man down to one knee. Claira pulls back and lines up a kick but can’t pull it off as Dentari charges in with a clothesline that knocks Claira down and sends her rolling to the outside. Dentari takes a moment too long to stare at Claira on the outside allowing Lisa Loeh time to run up behind him and take him down with a German Suplex which sends him rolling under the bottom rope.]

DDK:
Navarro really needs to restore order in this match!

Angus:
Who the fuck even put him in charge of this? It’s been made pretty clear in the past he couldn’t control a TV!

DDK:
Angus, Eric Dane put him in charge because of his experience with the lucha libre style employed by trios wrestling.

Angus:
Oh shit.

[Loeh runs at Rinaldi, who has just gotten back to his feet, and attempts a Forearm Shiver. Rinaldi takes a step back but seems unaffected by it as he grabs Lisa and hip tosses her over the top rope. Lisa lands sat on the apron before dropping to the outside next to Claira St. Sure. Rinaldi clutches at his chest, clearly feeling the effects of the strike from Lisa before both St. Sure and Loeh grab a hold of his ankles and try to pull him to the outside of the ring. Rinaldi stays standing until Diane Parker runs in and takes him down with a neckbreaker variation. Together all three Brujas drag Rinaldi to the outside where Claira and Lisa lay stomps and kicks into him.]

DDK:
Finally the ‘Big’ man is off his feet!

Angus:
But it took all three Brujas to do it!

[Finally with just Diane Parker and Tony Di Luca left in the ring order seems to have been restored.]

DDK:
Weren’t Dentari and Claira the legal persons?

Angus:
I think Hector’s just happy to have two people in the ring again.

[On the outside Dentari rushes around the ring to defend Rinaldi, forcing St Sure and Loeh to retreat to their corner. Meanwhile on the inside of the ring Di Luca and Parker tie up in the center. Diane takes Di Luca down with a rolling knee bar, though she releases the hold after only a few seconds so that she can put a couple of boots the back of Tony’s hamstring. Diane follows up with an elbow drop to the side of Di Luca’s knee and ties his leg up in a leg lock. Di Luca sits up and lashes out a right hand that narrowly misses Diane’s chin, but he does manage to grab a handful of her hair and tugs at it until she breaks the hold.]

DDK:
Navarro’s not even bothering with counts now…

Angus:
Like any of them would listen to him.

[Both Di Luca and Parker get to their feet, Diane slightly quicker, allowing her to grab Di Luca by the head and snapmare him to the mat. She pulls her leg back before nailing a soccer kick to the spine that echoes around the arena! Diane lays Di Luca down and covers for a two!]

DDK:
I think I can still hear that kick.

Angus:
I’m not surprised, this crowd are fucking dead.

DDK:
Do I really need to explain why?

Angus:
Probably… to some people anyway… Couldn’t hurt to remind me anyway…

[Diane pulls Di Luca to his feet and steadies him before lifting her leg for a high front kick. Di Luca catches the leg though and throws Parker with a leg trap belly to belly suplex. Diane goes rolling into the most incorrect corner she could have rolled into and tries to get away, but with Di Luca closing in and Rinaldi and Dentari either side of her she doesn’t have anywhere to go.]

Angus:
Wrong part of town!

[Di Luca plants a stomp to Diane’s chest, then another, then another, and another until Hector Navarro finally steps in and pushes him away. Navarro warns Di Luca to listen to her, which Tony seems to do, but only to keep her in conversation while Dentari and Rinaldi choke, punch and stomp at Diane through the ropes.]

[Claira and Lisa really aren’t going to stand by and watch as Dentari and Rinaldi choke their partner and step into the ring. Navarro stops talking to Di Luca and tries to intercept the Brujas, but to no avail. On their way past Claira and Lisa double clothesline Di Luca before through themselves at the other two members of the LBC. A double dropkick from the two knocks Rinaldi off of the apron before they drag Alceo along the apron and double hip toss him into the ring.]

Angus:
Seriously!

[Rinaldi slides into the ring and charges into Lisa and Claira, knocking them off of Dentari before turning back to Diane and eating a dropkick to the face. Diane almost gets wiped out as Di Luca charges in with a lunging clothesline and then…]

Ding Ding Ding!

DDK:
Was that the bell?

Angus:
You’ve got to be kidding me!

DDK:
I think Hector Navarro has called for the bell, and quite frankly I can’t blame him. He seems to have lost all control over this thing.

Angus:
Change the fucking referee or something! Don’t call the match off, Jesus Christ!

[But what’s done is done and DEF Security sweep the ring, quickly pulling Tres Brujas and The Legitimate Businessmen’s Club apart. Five of the six participants fight their restrainers though, eager to carry on.  Lisa Loeh is, needless to say, happy to not have to brawl.]

Angus:
Let ‘em go!

DDK:
The bell has rung Angus, I think this is over.

[Hector Navarro exits the ring and goes to speak to Quimbey. After a few words in his ear Darren lifts his microphone to his lips.]

Quimbey:
Ladies and Gentlemen, due to both teams refusing to follow instructions from the official this match has been ruled a no contest!

DDK:
For the love of... this mess is going to get a lot worse before it gets any better.

Angus:
Yeah, welcome to pro wrestling faggot.

Angus:
We got word that Lance Warner has finally caught up with Chance Von Crank.

DDK:
Take it away, Lance.

[Chance Von Crank wearing his rhinestone robe has his mullet slicked back as he rocks from left to right.]

Lance Warner:
Chance… You defeated Python last week and now this week you face Eugene Dewey. What are your thoughts before this big match and rumor around back you may have sold Charlene to sex smugglers?

[Crank keeps rocking left to right and slicking his mullet back.]

cVc:
That’s alot of fucking questions without a warrant, Lance Warner. I have traveled here for one reason…Goddamnit, I have said it over and over and I mean it. I will take over the wrestling business after this run. Believe it because Lance it is gonna happen. You think you asking me these stupid fucking questions about that red headed jew faggot means dick? Look at me Lance, you son of a bitch!

[Chance grabs his chin and as they lock eyes.]

cVc:
You think you know something about this fucking business? Look at me Lance! I don’t give one single fuck who is out there when I walk to the ring. If it’s Dewey, Python or Kai Scott I will leave with my hand raised it just doesn’t fucking matter who, queer.

Lance Warner:
Well I though…

cVc:
Quit That Shit, Quick! ... One day I will be DEF Champion, Lance. The only thing you will ever be remembered for is interviewing the great Chance Von Crank! That’s it. So before you do too much thinking, accept your buttered bread and shut the fuck up Lance!

[Chance slicks his mullet back still bouncing and slings the excess oil from it into the camera.]

cVc:
I want to end Python’s career. He is in the way and has to go. I will make it so when he meets kids with cancer being a jack off he will have to explain how mean ole cVc ended it all. He will beg them to buy his autograph for 5 dollars but obamacare won’t cover it. I want to cripple the snake.

[Lance shakes his head at the comments about Python.]

cVc:
There you go thinking again Lance. You think I am fucking playing games here?

[Chance grabs Lance with both hands around the collar pulling him up nearly choking him.]

cVc:
You know Eric Dane? Shake your head yes or no, cocksucker!

[Lance shakes his head indicating he does know Dane.]

cVc:
You go call that cheap fucking asshole and explaind to him that if I am not in the Main Event next week, I won’t fucking be here. He says Be Defiant, and no one does that anymore around here like the Shock N Rolla, yes or no?

[Lance again indicates yes by shaking his head.]

cVc:
You call and tell that fucker... I know how much he makes off my back and to have me in the middle of the card? No where near the Main Event with this fuck hole, no soul havin’, red headed faggot is a goddamn personal insult. I want you to tell him shit will change if he wants to keep making all that money… I know my way around this business and we can either get rich together… Or ill go back to America and tell him where to stick it in person. I am the hottest wrestler in this business right now and its been that way since I got here, LANCE!

[Chance releases his hold on Lance as he attempts to catch his breath.]

Lance:
That was totally uncalled for…

cVc:
Stop being a pussy.I hate this fucking place. Just because I am from the sticks doesn’t mean I want to eat with them. I hate the whole Japan culture and that gay shit with them swords, fucking legit gay. All your porno is cartoons and shit with some bitch with big titties getting fucked by a monster with tenticles? You into that weird slant eyed shit, Lance?

Lance:
No.

cVc:
Quit lieing… Nevermind it’s not like we are on tv anymore. A face like mine should always be on tv and fucking making top money. YOU GET IN THERE AND FUCKING CALL HIM, LANCE!

[Crank pushes Lance away as he goes back to getting ready for his match.]