Vae Victis - DEFIANCE Wrestling
Lawyer Plague Doctor, Esq. on behalf of “The Kraken” Henry Keyes
legal@strangerfruit.org

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

DEFCON SOHER TITLE MATCH STIPULATION ANNOUNCEMENT

[“The Airship” - San Francisco, CA, April 12, 2023] Vae Victis is pleased to announce that a stipulation has been signed as an addendum to the Southern Heritage Championship match between the glorious marauding breakfast champion, The Kraken, Henry Keyes, and The D’s Best Friend (and D stands for Dead), Elise Ares, at DEFCON. 

It is an homage to DEFCON 2021’s so-called “Littergate” featuring Keyes’s triumphant victory over Rezin (and the revelation that Teresa Ames also has a Litter Guy). Vae Victis will take another match’s already-announced element, pretend it doesn’t exist, and use it for Keyes’s own personal gain. Congratulations are presented to Arthur Pleasant and Michael Van Warren for becoming the second part (of two, for now) of the inevitable pub trivia question, “Which wrestlers have Henry Keyes double-gimmicked at a DEFCON?”

Keyes vs. Ares will be a ladder match. We have been assured that DEFIANCE stocks at least two ladders for every pay-per-view, so that’s probably good.

Oh. And they will open the whole damn show.

You can’t sit with us.

V A E   V I C T I S

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