“Wow.  I’m popular.”

[Heidi Christenson rolls her eyes.]

“I expected to hear a whole lot out of Dentari about me, and effort, and determination, and honor and prestige and whether or not I’m better’n him…”

“Spoiler alert, I am.”

“Didn’t expect Jimmy Kort to still be going on about it.”

“Really didn’t expect to hear that shit from Dragon Jones too.”

[Sigh indicating exasperation.]

“I’m almost lost for words, really.  I mean, I could waste a few on Kort and Dragon, but here’s my problem.”

“I like Christian Light.”

“And even though, just like she said, Claira St. Sure and I have some complicated history from our OLW days, but those days are gone, and God bless the memory of the CAL, but I’m glad they’re gone, and here in Defiance I’ve got nothing but respect for what Claira’s done.”

“And Alceo Dentari’s just so tiresome that I don’t want to give him the time of day.”

[She’s still wearing the same grey sweatpants as last time, along with a Hydra T-shirt assuredly worn ironically.]

“The first time I saw Christian Light, I’d never even thought to think about becoming a World Champion myself.  IWA was small time, pretty much everyone in it was a kid and didn’t know anything.  Daeriq Damien could pull off the evil veteran routine at the age of 24.  Light was… so good that I, we, could barely understand what it was we were watching.”

“Thinking back to the real old days… it’s a trip and a half.”

“And it just amazes me that Christian Light’s still pretty much the same person he was back then.”

[Another sigh.  Weariness.]

“How do you do it, Christian?”

“I go out here and wrestle and I deal with all the guys who want my attention and all the men and women trying to make a name and reputation at my expense, and it just… grinds me down.”

“It makes me doubt myself, and worse, it makes me hate, makes me want to lash out, and that’s… always had a way of catching someone innocent in the crossfire.”

“You have to understand… no, you have to believe me when I say this.”

“I don’t like doing to people what I did to Jimmy Kort.”

“I get bitter, did you know that?  Just like Jeff does.  But instead of stomping around all surly-mad, I try to fight the good fight, I try to be the good person that most people want me to be.  That I want to be.  That I do want to be.  But sooner or later, that bitterness comes out, and because I save it up… when it does, someone gets hurt.”

“And then I feel bad.”

“Funny, isn’t it?  The, what’s that nickname they gave me, Sexy Submission Siren, feeling bad about hurting people.”

[She sighs again.]

“But, oh God I’m rambling, I try, and I try and I try, and it’s all fine right up until it isn’t.”

“It happened to Adam Delicious.  It happened to Jeff, and that was the worst one, because I got to justify it, just like I did with Jimmy Kort, that I was doing it for the greater good.  Instead I cost him the CAL World Title, and it’s sitting on the mantle of a man he truly hates to this day.  Then I came to Defiance and it happened to Wendy Briese, and then of course to Jimmy.”

“You don’t do that.”

[Heidi rubs her hand in front of her eyes.]

“There’s a difference... between what you did to Alceo Dentari in the TLC, and what you did to all of Evolution in War Games, and what I did to Jimmy Kort.”

“I mean, look at you.”

“You’re 270 lbs, your biceps have biceps, you wear your integrity on your shoulder and nobody questions it.  They go after it because they want your attention, and they want to make a name at your expense, but it’s different.”

“They’ll call you a fraud to make noise, but they wouldn’t dare actually believe it.”

“You’re a real life action hero and I’ve got Goldman calling me a cunt on live television and Stephen Greer burying me after he gets fired, Jake Donovan claiming he throws all his matches against me, and thanks for reminding me, Kevin Cage’s creepy ass obsessing over me.”

“It’s not your fault, I know, and…”

[Again, she rubs her eyes.]

“With all the people I could be blaming, and could be punishing – and I have to work for them, and fight two of the few people who bear no responsibility for any of my problems.”

“I’m sorry, Christian.”

“Christian Light vs Heidi should have been one of the biggest spectacles the wrestling world had ever seen.  We should have had the retired legends, the ones who stayed retired, coming out of the woodwork to watch.  We should have sold out the Superdome.”

“Instead, look at this mess that Defiance is in, and either I humiliate myself, or run the risk of making it worse.”

“And as for Claira…”

[Another sigh.]

“I don’t know exactly what Kai told you about me and Gemma Lockhart.  I know Eric Dane pretty much told me not to talk about her because she’s not coming to Defiance, but… if you hate someone for eight straight years, you can’t just forget them.”

“She and I tore each other apart on four different occasions.  One clean win each, one bullshit win each.”

“But when you hate somebody, when you hate somebody so much that you’re willing to tear down everything else just so long as it hurts them more than it hurts you… you’ve etched that hatred right into your soul.”

“I know, you’re probably going to think I’m being dramatic.”

“Maybe I am.”

“But I can’t ignore it.”

“If you ever have reason to hate anyone like that, you’ll know what I mean.”

“I hope it doesn’t end up being me, but, you know… ask Wendy, or Jane, or that stupid bitch DuBov who wanted me to notice her.  I have a way of making women hate me.”

“It’s not fun.  Ask Kai some time if he still says that line about ‘it takes a woman to hate properly’.”

[Heidi gathers her hair back.]

“But despite all this.  Despite not wanting to hate the guys from Heritage and not believing in what my side stands for… I still want to win this tournament.”

“Because sometimes… even if you know it’s not going to stop all the bullshit talk…”

“It’s very satisfying to win, to just plain win, and to stare into the face of whoever was most recently claiming that you were a phony and you weren’t actually any good and you couldn’t win, and telling them.”

“I won.  Fuck you, I won.”

“Right about now, I really need to be able to shout that from the rooftops.”

"Even if I have to beat the good guys to do it."

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