Inside the Mellon Center in Pittsburgh sets are being set up and the big show is being well prepared for. Outside is a different story, animal rights activist’s hold signs up condemning Chance Von Crank.  The crowd outside started small but has grown over the last few hours. Chants condemning Crank began hours before as well. The man himself sits inside the area in one of the seats. The arena is dark for the most part and the only light is for workers away from Chance. He sits alone in nearly complete darkness looking at the ring from his seat. He can hear the chants outside just enough to smile as he looks on. A camera man focus’s in on Chance the best he can with the horrific lighting. Chance is on the phone.

cVc:  Listen… I need that snake skin finished and ready in the measurements I gave you. I sent the measurements through my assistant and I need them as soon as possible. After I win the Southern Heritage title, that’s what the back of my strap will be done in, Python snake skin. Yeah I know its fucking brilliant, it was my idea.

 Chance hangs up on the tanner. Chance laughs after hanging up and finally notices the camera man filming him.

cVc: I wanted that to be a surprise for a future Defiance TV, Fucker. Thanks for ruining that now I wanted to make all the pussies with signs outside happy.

Chance calls the camera man over.

cVc: Mr. Controversy is at it again, listen to them out there. You’re welcome Python, I made this all too easy for you. Even when Defiance staff made you stand next to one of those, “Must be this tall to fuck with The Trailer Park Prodigy” signs and you failed…  Still here we are. I fell asleep earlier watching your power point presentation that was two shit shades of terrible. How in the fuck have you made it this far with lame shit like that? You talk shit like a bitch with a busted lip and taking a warrant for a spouse. Rambling on and on about shit that just does not matter. Nearly everything that leaves your cocksucker is horse shit. I don’t have any fans? I suck?

Chance calls to a ring hand to get one of his fans from the group of people waiting outside for another meet and greet. The ring hand returns with a fan wearing one of his new shirts.

cVc:  Here get this fan of mine on camera, Wear my shit proud! Give him some light back there Eddie!

Chance screams at the lighting guy to get the best shot of his fan’s shirt. The camera man gets a shot of the fan showing off his new shirt.

Fan: This is fucking awesome, man! Wait until my friends outside hear about this, can I get you to sign my shirt?

cVc: I don’t sign autographs, asshole.

Fan: Really?!?

cVc: GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE! Can’t you see I’m putting a nail in a fucking coffin here?

The fan is escorted away by one of the ring hands. Chance turns his attention back to the camera.

cVc: Since you’re the money maker around here Python, lets see a shot of your officially licensed t-shirt… I’ll wait…. Wait… Common Knowledge tells me these people coming to this PPV will give a fuck about buying a shirt that doesn’t exist about like they did for that shit presentation you gave earlier. You go on and on about how I’m not this and your that. I hope you choke on the very next dick that you suck. You are a walking contradiction motherfucker, saying THE TRAILER Park Prodigy doesn’t matter? You’re not worried about me? Yet all that comes out of your mouth is my name? Biggest fucking mistake of your life is underestimating the Shock-N-Rolla.... I have a point to prove and ill break your fucking back to do just that. You sit there with your picture slide show because you lack any real shit to hit me with.  You’re weak motherfucker and I know that you know that. I am custom made from head to toe of my own doing and I use my real name not ripping off the name of probably the most Pussy snake to ever exist. The only thing you have her squeezed the life out of is another man's penis. Everything you have said over the past two weeks is as weak at that spine running down your backside.

Chance stands up and walks toward the ring. Ring hand Eddie still watching on as the camera man films every step of cVc. Eddie flips the lights on that are directly over the ring just as Chance gets to the steps. He steps through the ropes and looks around the still mostly dark arena. Chance spins around in the ring as the camera man films.

cVc: 18,150 people will surround this ring… All here to watch us all do our thing. Everyone in the battle royal sure has a chance to win.  Whew the lights above this ring are bright, Snake Man. Your shitty music will hit and you will make your fudgepacker bo legged strut down that ramp and towards this ring. With every step closer you get to this ring you become more aware of this not being your night. You're asshole will tighten. Once those cold sweats hit you it’s just a matter of time before those weak knees give out. You can play with power point and look queer in every promo you shoot all you like, but this will be my night. No amount of vitamins or hitting your cock sucking knees to blow Jesus will help. You may come into Untouchable believing in God but you will leave this arena an atheist. No way after the fucking beating you’re about to take you will be able to believe in a higher power. Not even your God can help you against Chance Von Crank. In all the chaos of owning Python in every way in every promo I have not forgot the rest of you…. Dragon Jones don’t you think for one moment I have forgotten about you or your props. I know what you think you are a capable of… You think as highly of yourself as the rest of these wrestlers turned bitches do. Lash Graham you have Python’s attention if you were able to stay awake that long during that shit tirade he called a work.

 Chance stops talking in the ring and looks around once more. He spins doing his signature fist pump at his crotch.

cVc: Over eighteen thousand in this shit hole will react one way or another when they realize TPP has arrived. I will show you all how this is done, just stand back and watch me do my fucking thing. I don’t need power point presentations or cum swapping stories from washed out shit heads like Dragon Jones. Lash… Yeah I haven’t said all that much about you, but you have a target on your back from the get go. I know you are the only real wrestler in this free for all. All of you better bring your very best and I do Mean VERY Best… And even that…  Just won’t be enough..

Shock-N-Rolla… Here to Show Ya… Cocked Back and Fucking Loaded!

Chance Von Crank!

cVc: Python by the way...

Lick....

MY...

...balls

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