Title: Canadian Excursion
Featuring: Tom Sawyer
Date: 6/23/2013
Location: Calgary, AB, Canada

Tom Sawyer, live on the scene in Calgary. The floodwaters have mostly receded, in the big city. Medicine Hat is in some trouble, but... Tom has a contractual obligation. And besides, his minor star showing up in Calgary has gotten a flood of internet-based donations of funbucks, Bitcoins and PayPal to various organizations.
 
Also: Tom did a shitload of advertisements for the Red Cross and other stuff. So Canadia will be getting deluged with Tom Sawyer's friggin' face telling people to give blood. Tom couldn't be everywhere, but he sure could help how he can.
 
Anyway. Tom Sawyer, live on the scene. A DEFIANCE cameradude(IE an intern with a camcorder) has come with Tom, and although he's been busy, he's fucked up his fingernails, he's dog-tired and he wants to go sleep for about a week, Tom can't put off the work any longer. DefTV was coming up too soon, and he needed to talk shit about Seth Stratton and Dragon Jones.
 
The young DEFIANT has his blonde hair pulled back into a ponytail, a DEFIANCE baseball cap plunked on his head. The 'tail was sticking through the ponytail-hole. Natch. He had on a Calgary Flames tee-shirt, and dirt-smudged bluejeans. He wasn't on some Ecstacy-induced PokeHallucination. Tom was doing important disaster relief work.
 
“Ya know, Seth, I've known a lot of guys like you.”
 
Tom sniffed, one hand coming up to wipe at his upper lip. Floods brought mud, and mud brought dirt everywhere. Tom smeared mud across his cheek by wiping at his nose and upper lip.
 
“Bullies who thought they were safe by couching everything as a joke. And in your case, cheating bullies who is trying to make everything a joke, to insulate you from any kind of backlash.”
 
Tom reached down, wiping off his hands on his already-muddy jeans. Taking a few moments to think, Tom shook his head a little bit.
 
“It isn't really like me to talk about my reputation and my status in DEFIANCE like I'm some bigshot. But here's the thing. Seth Stratton... I've been here for a good long while. I've seen lots of people come and go. I could make a list of just a few of the names that have passed harmlessly through DEFIANCE during my time here.”
 
He could, too. Chasin' Lincoln, Saint Louis #3, The Good Time Boys... Ya know. Plenty of dudes.
 
“And so far, I don't see any reason why anyone is gonna be talking about Seth Stratton in six months. The bully routine is already being done better by people like Alceo Dentari, Bronson Box, and Heidi Christenson. The smug jerk who always has a funny little joke to make? Well, Cancer Jiles has that all sewn up. The guy playing headgames? Kai Scott's got that under wraps. Cheating? Well, we could talk for hours about THAT particular one...”
 
Tom turns, looking down at the still-unruly Elbow River. With his face mostly turned away from the camera, Tom purses his lips.
 
“Thing is, Seth, you were rehired to DEFIANCE for a reason. Because you make funny jokes and get laughs from the crowd. And I'm not gonna step on your toes about that. If you can stay with the company and actually get some facetime doing it, I think you'd carve yourself out a nice little niche. But there's a lot of dudes who have tried to do just that.”
 
Tom shot a sidelong glance to the camera, measuring it.
 
“Carve out a spot in DEFIANCE for themselves, that is. It's a lot harder than it looks. It's not just showing up and putting in a timeslip, being booked in matches and ending up getting your pay after. Don't believe me? Just ask your tag partner.”
 
Oh, Tom went there. It was kinda a touchy subject, too. Tom had invited the Nargod to come with him to Mechanicville, once upon a time. It didn't really pan out.
 
“Dragon Jones. Man, I liked you once. Your sense of humor was fun. Now you're all bitter and cigarette-smoking. It could be cool, if you didn't continually sabotage yourself with your own bad attitude and stuff. But...”
 
Tom looked down, sighing. He threw up his hands in helpless defeat. 
 
“You two could make a good team. The Bad Attitude Crew. The smug one, who always has something to say, and the bitter one, who always has a biting barb to throw. Add a third guy and you would fit right in amongst Dentari and his goons, Box and his goons, White and HIS goons...”
 
Tom was sounding increasingly bitter himself.
 
“But you, Seth Stratton, have done me a disservice. You're ignoring me, and I don't like that. I don't like your attitude, either. I don't like how you treat Eugene like he's not a rad dude, and I don't like how you treat the world like your own personal candy jar. It ends at TV 38.”
 
Tom Sawyer whirled on his heel, one hand clenched into a fist. He thumped the fist on his chest.
 
“Are Eugene and I a better tag team than you two? We'll find out at the show, but I'm definitely a STRONGER person than you are, Seth! Hiding behind your cheap insults, your jabs at Eugene's weight and his mother and whatever? Well, the time for jokey-jokes is over, Stratton!”
 
Sawyer threw his hair back, eyes bulging as he levelled an accusatory finger at the camera.
 
“I've gone toe to toe with devils, Seth. I've fought Immortals and Daemons and Scumsuckers and all the rest. Nothing's kept me down yet. You can sharpen up your tongue all your want, you can fling all the mud and faeces you can bring to bear...”
 
Tom Sawyer adopted a rockstar pose, both fists going out to his sides, eyes still wide and glaring, hair blowing softly in the Canadian wind.
 
“But I'm still gonna be standing after all the words are gone and there's nothing left but blood and sparks. So the real question comes down to, are Dragon Jones and Seth Stratton better fighters than Eugene Dewey and Tom Sawyer?”
 
Tom let his head fall back, eyes going to the sky, then falling shut.
 
“Guess we'll find out at DefTV 38.”


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