’Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the holes,
People were preparing, however there was one very sour troll.

High atop in his apartment building he sat perched,
Malak gazed down at the bustling streets people lurched.

“Ridiculous,” He muttered,
He even gave a few sympathetic ASMR finger flutters.

He noticed stockings and lights and everything bright,
For he always felt Christmas season just wasn’t right.

“Imbeciles,” He spoke,
All this Christmas cheer was surely going to give him a stroke.

Customers bustled in and out of stores,
Malak ensured to always keep his residence doors closed.

He peered through windows and noticed presents stacked with love,
The troll dare not sing silly songs about any such turtle doves.

“Rubbish,” He croaked,
Emulating DEFIANCEs resident bloke.

To the internet he scoured,
For all the online souls to devour.

Clicking and clacking on his keyboard he went,
His mission to cause upset and a stir took assent.

He threatened and bashed,
Leaving users a virtual gash.

There were children and gamers nestled all snug in their threads,
While visions of evil snowflakes now danced in their heads.

“How can I ruin Christmas?” Malak trolled,
He most certainly wanted to leave everyone out in the cold.

“THAT’S IT!” He exclaimed as he closed his laptop by feel,
A plan formulated with resorting to steal.

Malak dressed with haste, as he knew his time was short,
He hoped this wasn’t something that would end him up in court.

Out the building he ran,
With an empty toy sack in hand.

“I’m going to steal Christmas,” The snowflake bellowed,
There was a hobo nearby, making the snow indeed yellow.

He slithered and scampered his way through places,
Just like Ricky Henderson, stealing bases.

Undetected and untraced, the snowflake filled his sack,
By this time at night, everything was pitch black.

The streets were bare, and Garland didn’t care,
The crispness of Christmas had been snatched straight out of the air.

He was just about done, when he came to a pause,
No, he didn’t lay eyes on Santa Claus.

There was a tiny girl, with shivering feet,
Malak wondered what she was doing in the middle of the street.

“Go away little girl,” The scoundrel implied,
The girl looked at his sack and couldn’t help but utter a cry.

“Mister, mister, what do you have in that bag?”
All Malak heard was nag, nag, nag.

“Nothing my sweet petunia,” He diverted,
The little girl was definitely extroverted.

“I saw you steal Christmas,” She said with a jeer,
Her voice was full with sadness, dread and a tear.

“FIRST!” Malak commented, trying not to be lamented,
“I did not steal Christmas,” His justification, cemented.

Malak huffed and puffed as he was nearly home free,
What was this little girl doing out at quarter to three?

“I didn’t steal Christmas,” Malak lied,
Wishing this girl would go back to her hole and hide.

He wasn’t getting out of it, so he needed to use more wit.
He obviously thought this girl was a twit.

“You see, I just hate Christmas,” Malak fake pouted,
The little girl was having none of it, as she shouted.

“YOU CAN’T STEAL CHRISTMAS, IT’S TOO IMPORTANT TO EVERYONE,” She gasped,
Her winter sewn mittens, on her hands the whole time, clasped.

His eyes eventually wandered and saw,
Christmas Garland strung above the spa.

His eyes welt up with fear,
For finally, he felt that fabled Christmas cheer.

“Balderdash,” He fought,
These were feelings that couldn’t be bought!

He promised the little girl to return Christmas to where he had taken,
All he could ask for was to be mistaken.

The little girl nodded and smiled with joy,
She knew everyone was getting back their toy.

So, the snowflake hurried back and made everything right,
He apologized profusely and scurried off into the night.

Malak Garland overcame his Christmas blight,
AND A MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL, AND TO ALL A GOODNIGHT!

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