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TALKING SMACK

"Look at the size of this freakin' house. That's right. As Joe the Plumber alluded to, I have a bazillion homes, each at least two hundred square miles in area. This is one such home. Remember that part of the book of Revelation in the Bible when John gave the dimensions of the city in heaven and described it in miles of length, the walls in miles of height and so on? It might as well have been a studio apartment compared to this. My home has mile markers. That's what I'm sayin', here. I'm not FROM Texas. Texas is inside my house. It's that big. Right now, I'm sitting on a couch in one of two-hundred fifty living areas in this one house alone. Just outside the window is my swimming pool, the Gulf of Mexico. I pay thirty Mexicans to lift my dick for me when I pee."

- Dan Ryan

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