Here we go, me an Mr. Ellis hit tha road to Wess Virginee ta knock off tha ring rust, wiffout sandpaper er a grinder. I dunno how we gone ta knock tha rust off wiffout'em thou.

Ah well, we gotta country mile ta go till we get ta Wess Virginee. I rekon I'm ready but I dunno. Maybe I shoulda be like the Lil Engine that could.

I thanks I's can. I thanks I's can.

Jus wish Mr. Ellis woulda told me a lil sooner than he done did. I wonted ta visit ole Kim. I's gonna ask'er big boobies ona date to tha pitcher show. Oh ta have dreams.

~

An our ana haff down tha road I looked over at Mr. Ellis while he's a drivin an he wasa grinnin from ear ta ear.

So I asked him. "Mr. Ellis, whys ya smilin sa big fer?"

He looked over at me an then back to tha road.

"Boy, we's fixin ta make us some moneys. Yer gunna rassle a couple times in Wess Virginee an we'll get paid. That's why I'm sa happy." Mr. Ellis said wiff'at stupid grin on his face.

I jus looked away out that foggy winder. I ain't see nuttin but trees an more trees. Trus me it wasa borin ride.

"Mr. Ellis ya got any new songs on them tapes?" I asked.

He pulled outta tape from tha side of his door.

"Boy, I gotcha covered. I brung good ole Willie Nelson, ma hero." He replied.

Oh great, I hate me some Willie Nelson.

As tha song begun ta play it wasn't jus ole Willie, it wasa Waylon too. I thought I's livin down'er wiff tha devil when it started.

Ta try ta take a break from tha music I decid'd ta talk ta Mr. Ellis. It weren't a good idear but it was tha best'n I had.

"So Mr. Ellis, ya know anythin bout any these fellers I'mma rassle?" I asked.

Mr. Ellis spit his ole backer in tha empy bottle an kinda grinned. He grins too much fer me, kinda makes me thank he likes me more than a client.

"I know'at Dragon Jones feller. He wasa WWA champion in somethin er another. I ain't heard of that Hotrod er Lone Wolf befer. I rekon Jones isa lil feller tho. He's prolly gon ta be a fastin tho." Mr. Ellis replied.

"Well I rekon I can rassle a lil feller. He prolly be easier ta pick up an toss round tha ring wiff ease. Ya rekon?" I asked.

Mr. Ellis shrugged his shoulders an quit talkin.

I figured he'd do'at. He really like ta listen ta his music na matter how bad it is unfortunatly.

I woner why he ain't done na resurch on ma oppon'ts? What am I a payin'em fer? I rekon nuttin butta ride round ta ma matches. Maybe I'll jus use'em as a showfer.

I rekon I can take out that there Dragon, I'll jus toss'em round like done wiff ole Hoss, paw's old stubb'rn mule. He's a pushover spec'ally when I can get under'em an deadlift'em.

I woner'd what ma maw an how shes a gettin all them chores did wiff me on the road. Kindly makes me wanna tear up an cry fer ma poor maw an her bad hands. She ain't got much hand grippage. Her hands is goin an I hate it.

Now as fer them other two fellars I'm afraid fer'rm. Wiff me not knowin'em I'm libal ta hurts'em pretty bad. I hear'd of that ole Hotrod fellar from ma first visit to Defi'nce Rasslin. Hear'd he wasa tuffin but I dunno.

I did hear sumthin bout that Lone Wolf wasa well-traveled fella. I dunno if'n thats a good thang er a baddin. I rekon we'll be seein soon.

"Boy we's here." Mr. Ellis said. "Here we is in tha great state of ole Wess Virginee."

"Aight Mr. Ellis, I'm reat ta rassle. I'm reat fer that big ole paycheck. Let's kick this pig in tha ole baby maker." I replied as I got outta tha car.

Here we go inta tha wide world of pig farmin an tha doody smell that makes ya feel like a reel winner.

Pee Youuuuuu!

More Propaganda | View Samuel Tiberius Turner the Second's Biography